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Off Topic :
anyone have advice on death-will

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 lifestoshort (original poster member #18442) posted at 3:33 PM on Wednesday, January 15th, 2014

please dont quote me. father died. only child here. he never wanted will, but I helped him with one cause he was terminal and nurses asked for it. im estranged from his family. they see me as threat so that was my main reason. he didnt want it but told me what to write (he was doing well when it was done) made sure he did not sign it near me and told him to sign it if he wanted but hed have to go to bank. he never did. he may have had it notarized at his home. no way of knowing. there is NO will singed anywhere. we checked and his house is burnt to ground

anyway, i want will to go as he stated BUT I want some executive decision making in it. its my lawful right. siblings do not want that and per will thats non existent now states a sibling gets to make decisions. i want to do it with them. they wont allow it.

per interstate law, I get 100% with no will. you think they would make some compromise with me. im not even disputing money. Im standing up for my rights as his only child, which they hate.

my option is to stand up as child, and they fight me. or I stand down and I feel less of anyone important to him yet again. lawyers tell me to take all but thats not in my blood.

[This message edited by lifestoshort at 3:51 PM, January 15th (Wednesday)]

Im 45. 1st H I left in 2001 after 3 kids. narcassist.
2nd exH had MANY affairs.FALSE R. cheats again. D 5/09. 2 kids. I got 100% custody. ex hasnt seen kids in 6 yrs.
2014 to now: dated highschool sweetheart. He cheated w 23 yr old & left.

posts: 1061   ·   registered: Mar. 2nd, 2008
id 6640700
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ArkLaMiss ( member #14918) posted at 3:58 PM on Wednesday, January 15th, 2014

Screw them! You should inherit. If they have issues, too bad. They sound toxic, so do what you think best.

Just HOW stupid do you think I am, exactly?

posts: 1806   ·   registered: Jun. 8th, 2007
id 6640750
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Sad in AZ ( member #24239) posted at 4:22 PM on Wednesday, January 15th, 2014

Follow the law, and you can't go wrong. If state law says you inherit everything, so be it. NC with the idiots; if that's not going to work for you, quote the law. Period.

You are important and you matter. Your feelings matter. Your voice matters. Your story matters. Your life matters. Always.

Me: FBS (no longer betrayed nor a spouse)-63
D-day: 2007 (two years before finding SI)
S: 6/2010; D: 3/2011

posts: 25351   ·   registered: Jun. 3rd, 2009   ·   location: Arizona
id 6640808
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Dreamboat ( member #10506) posted at 4:30 PM on Wednesday, January 15th, 2014

You are his child and you deserve to inherit his estate, if there is anything left after bills are paid. And legally, with no will I think that it does go to you after to works its way thru probate.

If you want to do something for your relatives after this is all settled, then you can. But right now you do need to stand up for yourself because no one else will.

I am sorry for the loss of your father.

(((hugs)))

And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off
-- Shake It Out, Florence And The Machine

posts: 17695   ·   registered: Apr. 25th, 2006   ·   location: A better place :)
id 6640822
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Too_Trusting ( member #99) posted at 4:34 PM on Wednesday, January 15th, 2014

While states may vary, in general, the laws of intestate succession (dying without a valid will) state that the 1st line descendants inherit all. IOW, being the only child, the estate goes to you.

If there are no children, then the estate usually defaults to any parent alive at the time of death. If no parents survive the decedent, then and ONLY THEN does the estate divide among the siblings.

It sounds like the estate is rightfully yours, and yours alone. I agree with the others - go NC with the siblings and inherit the estate that is rightfully yours. Should you CHOOSE to share anything with them, you can. But, you are under no obligation to.

"Anyone perfect must be lying; anything easy has its cost. Anyone plain can be lovely; anyone loved can be lost." Barenaked Ladies

posts: 27842   ·   registered: Jun. 13th, 2002   ·   location: North Carolina
id 6640831
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gonnabe2016 ( member #34823) posted at 4:35 PM on Wednesday, January 15th, 2014

If you are talking about *his* siblings -- then tell them to back the fuck off and let you do what needs to be done. With no will, no spouse, and no executor named by him anywhere YOU are in the drivers seat here. YOU. NOT them, no matter how often or loudly they squawk about it.

It is in YOUR best interest to follow the law here. And I don't mean that in a materialistic way. If you start *giving away* what is legally/rightfully yours, there could be some pretty unfavorable tax consequences to you.

I don't see that you are being greedy, petty, or spiteful. I see THEM as being WAY out of line.

"Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive." - Sir Walter Scott

In my effort to be *concise*, I often come off as blunt and harsh. Sorry, don't mean to be offensive.

posts: 9241   ·   registered: Feb. 15th, 2012   ·   location: Midwest
id 6640832
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Deeply Scared ( Administrator #2) posted at 4:51 PM on Wednesday, January 15th, 2014

lifestoshort...

Please do not delete your post/s that is against the guidelines.

Thank you.

"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." My Mom:)

My tolerance for stupid shit is getting less and less.

posts: 210060   ·   registered: May. 31st, 2002
id 6640869
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 lifestoshort (original poster member #18442) posted at 9:52 PM on Wednesday, January 15th, 2014

thank you. all friends and attys say same. Im going with my legal rights. thanks for commenting

Im 45. 1st H I left in 2001 after 3 kids. narcassist.
2nd exH had MANY affairs.FALSE R. cheats again. D 5/09. 2 kids. I got 100% custody. ex hasnt seen kids in 6 yrs.
2014 to now: dated highschool sweetheart. He cheated w 23 yr old & left.

posts: 1061   ·   registered: Mar. 2nd, 2008
id 6641295
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LisaP ( member #15088) posted at 2:18 AM on Thursday, January 16th, 2014

My father passed a few years ago. No will, no spouse. 3 children left to deal with everything.

I just wanted to suggest that you get an estate attorney, forward your Dad's mail to your address, notify SS/retirement administrator, all bank and credit cards of his passing. If you don't know these, the mail will reveal it. He may have a safety deposit box at the bank. Once you establish yourself as executor, you can get access to all this. Our sister got to our Dad's before we arrived to his hometown/state and it was "empty"....

Death brings out the worst in people. It's frustrating watching the cockroaches come out and try to benefit off someone's death. All they should be doing is giving you support. Protect yourself and your rights. You know what your Dad wanted.

[This message edited by LisaP at 8:19 PM, January 15th (Wednesday)]

Me BS

Divorced!

~Feel your emotions, but control your behavior~ Unknown

posts: 2200   ·   registered: Jun. 23rd, 2007   ·   location: Oregon
id 6641624
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