Cookies are required for login or registration. Please read and agree to our cookie policy to continue.

Newest Member: Missmee

Divorce/Separation :
One reason to be the *first to file*.....

This Topic is Archived
default

 gonnabe2016 (original poster member #34823) posted at 6:19 PM on Saturday, February 22nd, 2014

You are assured that the D will happen in the jurisdiction of your choosing.

This will not make a whit of difference in most cases, but for those who have devious stbx's...it may. A devious stbx can figure out *where* the most favorable place for a D is in his/her circumstance, establish residency there, and then file there. And then YOU are (potentially) screwed.

People who might need to be wary of this are those whose stbx travels a lot and those who live near state lines.

Just be wary and keep your guards up.

"Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive." - Sir Walter Scott

In my effort to be *concise*, I often come off as blunt and harsh. Sorry, don't mean to be offensive.

posts: 9241   ·   registered: Feb. 15th, 2012   ·   location: Midwest
id 6697060
default

Phoenix1 ( member #38928) posted at 8:04 PM on Saturday, February 22nd, 2014

This was actually a potential concern for me before we filed. XPOS moved out of state, and I found out he was asking around about the residency requirements to file there, which was six months. I knew I had six months to get everything filed in my state and the clock was ticking. He was dragging his feet with paperwork I sent him, but Providence shown on me and I found out about latest OC. That gave me the leverage I needed to push it thru. (We did a dissolution so it required input/signatures from both parties before it could be filed, thus the reason he could drag it out.)

fBS - Me
Xhole - Multiple LTAs/2 OCs over 20+yrs
Adult Kids
Happily divorced!

You can't go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending. ~C.S. Lewis~

posts: 9059   ·   registered: Apr. 9th, 2013   ·   location: Land of Indifference
id 6697168
default

RealityStinks ( member #41457) posted at 8:09 PM on Saturday, February 22nd, 2014

This weighed on my decision to file. WW moved to a neighboring county where she is VERY well connected. I would have been royally screwed if she filed in the county she is currently living in as opposed to the one we have lived in for the past several years. She may very well have been waiting until she had her PO box long enough to establish residency before she filed. I don't know, and don't care at this point because I beat her to it.

posts: 414   ·   registered: Nov. 26th, 2013
id 6697172
default

Darcy3 ( member #39696) posted at 8:51 PM on Saturday, February 22nd, 2014

This was a concern for me as well. My ex had moved to another county and even though I didn't think he would file...that would require effort on his part...I needed to make sure it was done in my county as my lawyer would not go out of this county, and she is one of the best around.

Me = BS
Him = WS
3 teenagers
Married 24 years
D-Day: Nov. 10, 2012
Divorced

posts: 63   ·   registered: Jun. 28th, 2013
id 6697222
default

wildbananas ( member #10552) posted at 10:59 PM on Saturday, February 22nd, 2014

Absolutely. ex-asshat filed first in a county that is 3.5 hours from where I was (we both left the marital home and moved to different areas).

The trips back and forth sucked.

Travel light, live light, spread the light, be the light. ~ Yogi Bhajan

posts: 16592   ·   registered: May. 1st, 2006   ·   location: Somewhere
id 6697353
default

nutmegkitty ( member #33882) posted at 11:46 PM on Saturday, February 22nd, 2014

This played a part in my D too.

Me - happy!
2 DDs

Very happily divorced from an NPD since 2013.

posts: 4401   ·   registered: Nov. 10th, 2011   ·   location: MA
id 6697392
default

Leia ( member #42510) posted at 11:54 PM on Saturday, February 22nd, 2014

That and my STBX didn't file temporary orders and throw me out of the house. Now we're roommates. My lawyer told me not to leave. I was just hours behind him, and I have no clue how he got a lawyer to meet with him on a Sunday. I was going to throw him out. So now, we're in legal limbo. It royally sucks.

"Somebody get this walking carpet out of my way." Princess Leia, Star Wars

posts: 296   ·   registered: Feb. 19th, 2014   ·   location: Kansas
id 6697398
This Topic is Archived
Cookies on SurvivingInfidelity.com®

SurvivingInfidelity.com® uses cookies to enhance your visit to our website. This is a requirement for participants to login, post and use other features. Visitors may opt out, but the website will be less functional for you.

v.1.001.20250404a 2002-2025 SurvivingInfidelity.com® All Rights Reserved. • Privacy Policy