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nutmegkitty (original poster member #33882) posted at 2:24 PM on Wednesday, February 26th, 2014
I don't normally have occasion to see the OC, but yesterday when I was picking up the girls she (OC) was at the front door hugging my youngest goodbye. The OC is almost 2 now.
Seeing this was like a punch in the gut. It made me feel so weird. Like, here is this kid who knows nothing about the circumstances under which she was born...who knows if she ever will and if that will be a cross for her to bear. And my kids love her, I'm sure. But I wonder what they think of her birth...
I feel...I don't know what I am feeling, really. I don't know what the emotion is. I think it's triggering my PTSD actually. I have not felt this unsettled for a while. I don't like feeling this way.
Me - happy!
2 DDs
Very happily divorced from an NPD since 2013.
sparkysable ( member #3703) posted at 2:39 PM on Wednesday, February 26th, 2014
I can't imagine how that must feel.
I hate when those surprises pop up every once in a while.
D-day OW#1 2/2004;D-day OW#2 5/2010
Marriages that start this way, stepping over the bodies of loved ones as the giddy couple walks down the aisle, are not likely to last.
nowiknow23 ( member #33226) posted at 2:40 PM on Wednesday, February 26th, 2014
You can call me NIK
And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane
GingerAle ( member #33822) posted at 2:44 PM on Wednesday, February 26th, 2014
My EXWH: 6 month EA in 2010 OW 1
2 year Sexting/PA 2012-2014 OW2
I divorced him in May 2014
SeanFLA ( member #32380) posted at 3:33 PM on Wednesday, February 26th, 2014
That has to be brutal to see and makes my heart sink for you. I'm so sorry.
BS(me) 53
WW 52
1 son 20 yrs old
Married 18 yrs, together 21 yrs
"You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have." ~ Bob Marley
BtraydWife ( member #42581) posted at 3:42 PM on Wednesday, February 26th, 2014
I would imagine it's difficult to see something so innocent and precious that came from so much pain and destruction. I'm so sorry.
Whalers11 ( member #27544) posted at 3:50 PM on Wednesday, February 26th, 2014
((nutmegkitty))
My ex has said that his OC will never know the truth, and that they plan to tell her that she was wanted and loved and mommy and daddy just couldn't get along anymore and that's why they aren't together. I know your situation is a little different from mine. It sucks no matter which way you cut it.
[This message edited by Whalers11 at 9:54 AM, February 26th (Wednesday)]
Nature_Girl ( member #32554) posted at 5:46 PM on Wednesday, February 26th, 2014
That would gut me. Totally gut me. To see an innocent, beautiful child but know that her creation was part of my destruction and the destruction of my children?
(((HUGS)))
Me = BS
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - DIVORCED!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJgjyDFfJuU
jo2love ( member #31528) posted at 7:45 PM on Wednesday, February 26th, 2014
newlysingle ( member #38735) posted at 7:54 PM on Wednesday, February 26th, 2014
I can totally understand why this would bother you. I would feel gutted as well.
I have a feeling that an OC will come along at some point for me as well and it's going to hurt. I know Hello Kitty wants a baby and it will make me sick that my children will have to be related to something these two scumbags have created.
BW - Me (40)
XWH -The Gnat
"Engaged" to OW, but the wedding appears to be indefinitely postponed.
M for 8 years, together for 10
1 DD (8), 1 DS (3)
Dday 3/13
Happily Divorced 9/20/13
Phoenix1 ( member #38928) posted at 8:01 PM on Wednesday, February 26th, 2014
((nutmegkitty))
I totally understand. I have only seen pics of the most recent OC. She is about 1.5 years with a sweet, innocent expression. She will never know the utter destruction her birth contributed to. I will likely never seen her (thank goodness) and hope I never do. She is innocent in all this and didn't ask to be brought into the world, but her very presence rips my guts out simply because of what it symbolizes.
fBS - Me
Xhole - Multiple LTAs/2 OCs over 20+yrs
Adult Kids
Happily divorced!
You can't go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending. ~C.S. Lewis~
nutmegkitty (original poster member #33882) posted at 10:02 PM on Wednesday, February 26th, 2014
Thank god you guys get it. It helps. I took a klonopin today and it helped too.
Me - happy!
2 DDs
Very happily divorced from an NPD since 2013.
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