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Omg what a horrible show! Wh was watching it well I was in the room (I wasn't watching it but I could hear some of it) I got up and told him I couldn't be in the room with a show that horrible and sickening on that crosses all kinds of boundaries and is pretty much just a show about two people cheating. He looked at me and said "it's not about cheating it's about survival!" Wtf ever! A married man and a single woman together on an island naked sleeping next to each other...sounds like cheating to me.

He was talking about how uncomfortable he was sleeping naked next to a naked woman that wasn't his wife and she was complaining because "he wouldn't stop talking about his wife and he wouldn't keep me warm with his body hear because he thought it was wrong because he is married it's so unfair I was cold wahhhhhh" worst show ever. What a bunch of crap. Wh ended up turning it off because I got so upset but he still thinks it's okay because his wife is aware he signed up for the show and what was involved. Whatever. It's still completely gross and inappropriate.

[This message edited by Angel177 at 1:09 PM, July 31st (Thursday)]

((( Angel177 )))

Hubby and I watch this show regularly. We love it. We're both very outdoorsy (camping, kayaking, etc).

We've seen nearly every episode and have seen multiple times where one or the other person refuses to "cuddle" when it gets cold (conserve body heat) out of respect for their SO.

I too see it as a show about surviving with not much more than your skills, one item from the outside world, and whatever you can find in nature. I WOULD like to see them mix up the survivalists (man/man, woman/woman) and not just always do man/woman combos.

I wouldn't want my husband to sign up for a show like this. However those are MY boundaries. I know I wouldn't last ten minutes, so would never think to sign myself up.

Other men/women seem to be "ok" with leting their SO try the show...that's on them.

So sorry this was a trigger for you.

[This message edited by GabyBaby at 2:59 PM, July 31st (Thursday)]

I love this show and never thought of it in a negative way....interesting..

Okay...so maybe I should take a deep breath and calm down. Maybe I over reacted on this one. It honestly instantly sent me into a blind rage...I was shaking I was so mad. Thanks for giving me another perspective.

I watch this show with my kids. I like it. Would never let my SO do it and would never do it myself. I think clearly there are times when boundaries are crossed during the show, and clearly there are times when they can't stand each other and the whole "naked" element is just that, another element to their survival.

That doesn't mean it didn't shake you down to your shoes. We each have our own triggers. If you don't like it, you don't like it. Period. Doesn't matter what we or your WH thinks.

This last season of Survivor, no infidelity, still triggered the fuck out of me. Sobbing, hyperventilating... The whole nine. Because the manipulator won. And I am tired of seeing that.

I do understand how this could trigger you. Especially the episode, and the part you saw. I watch the show regularly and I know exactly which episode you are referring to.

I, however, had the opposite reaction when I saw it. In a survival situation, where warmth can be critical, body heat can save your life.

He and his W knew he was going to be naked with a woman and cold. If sharing body warmth was going to be an issue, he should not have signed up for the show and put his survival partner in a position to practically beg for warmth.

It's a situation where you have to use whatever you have to survive.... or don't sign up for a show like that.

Maybe I over reacted on this one.

You didn't overreact. Something was upsetting you, and you spoke up. That's how we're supposed to do things in a marriage - in contrast to coming up with some bullshit excuse to be pissed off with your spouse, and deciding that an affair is the solution.

The second he saw you were upset, and that it was a direct result of his actions, his job was to turn off the show, and do everything in his power to help you feel better. Instead, he underreacted.

I am sorry this show was a trigger for you, but I agree with your WH - it's a show about survival and there actually a lot of scenarios you can end up in where you have no clothes or minimal clothes out in the wilderness. I think it's real and not 100% for controversy.

^^^What pass said. It's perfectly normal to trigger. Things that seem miniscule to another person can trigger the heck out of a BS. Don't feel bad at all.

I love that show. And I was not a fan of Survivor or anything like that. I totally get how that would trigger you though. But of all the episodes I've seen no one seems to go anywhere near each other sexually. But then I guess it's pretty hard to be romantic when you're pulling leeches off your private parts.

I have to disagree about the naked part not being controversial. They are naked for ratings. They are naked to get more people to watch. There are many "survival" shows, this is their "hook" to get people to watch their show.

I just don't understand why anyone wants to do these survival shows, let alone naked. Challenge? Fuck, life is a challenge, I don't need any more fucking challenges.

You had every right to feel the way you feel, Angel. We can not help what triggers us, it just does. I feel our WS's need to do whatever it takes to ease these triggers for us. To make us feel safe and comfortable.

If its any consolation to you angel, I feel the same way. What happens when the cameras stop rolling. There is a whole production crew filming this *survival* of the elements and are out there *roughing* it too but, the cameras don't show that because it doesn't titillate our senses.

How can we say we are against cheating yet, so supportive of things that are created to stir emotions and test boundaries. I guess I'm showing my age but, it seems to me that if we would like to see the human race rise to the challenge of honoring commitments and staying within the realms of sexual boundaries, we would see these things for what they are and use our eyes to enjoy other forms of entertainment.

I'm not a prude but, damn, I'm so sick of seeing how sex sells everything and, it only does because we buy it. Supply meet demand.

And that's all I have to say about that!

I'm many years out and that part of the show irritated the fuck out of me as well. I ended up turning it off, because I was hoping the whiney woman would actually freeze to death.

Oddly enough that young woman pissed me off with her refusal to understand what fidelity takes and to support his need to have good boundaries for his marriage. She sulked for the rest of the challenge and in the end did something that could have been disastrous because she wanted to be seen as all that and he refused.

I was happy to see a man who made his marriage a priority.

I could totally see her as the OW. She has a huge ego and she was not happy that a man didn't take her bait.

[This message edited by KatyaCA at 5:51 PM, July 31st (Thursday)]

^^ I agree!!

I agree there are life and death situations where body hear is a nessasary survival need...this show isn't one. The producers are not going to let these people die.

It really was the woman the bugged me more then the guy...she is ow material for sure. I give him credit for keeping his boundaries....my husband did a lot more then lay next to a naked woman and it definitly ws not a survival nessecity in his case...

I won't be watching this show anytime soon but I've calmed down about it now. Just was a crazy bad trigger for me. I trigger on all kinds of things that never would have bothered me before...I just feel so alert about boundaries now but every marriage and relationship has different boundaries for different reasons...this show definitly crosses them in my marriage but obviously not in everyone's marriage.

Thanks for the replies :)

WH and I watch it as well. Didn't bother me, but I did cheer the guy on when he stuck to his boundaries.

If your WS wants to watch a show about survival I would recommend Naked and Marooned. It's one man surviving alone, naked with no supplies.

Hubby and I talked about it. HE knew what he was signing up for. I'm confused on why he would have an issue with cuddling for body heat. He didnt' want to betray his wife - ok, I agree. Then don't sign up for the show.