SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

so my AP was also married and when my H told his W about the A he denied it and said I came on to him (not true). I had gone NC with him immediately and it appeared his W and he were reconciling. We have mutual friends who have said they are very much still married and are doing things together, he still lives there etc.

My friend found him on POF,. He says he is divorced and looking for a relationship. He is scum of the Earth.

Would you tell his wife? I know this information will not be welcome from me. But I hate to see him hurting more women. My story with him is pretty standard. He pursued me big time. I gave in and he "loved" me was leaving his wife etc. all the while it meant nothing to him. It was a RA on my part but I thought I fell in love.

I guess in some ways I just want him to get his karma

Would you as the BS want to know this? I know this isn't the first time or second or third. I lean toward no but I feel for her. I have been the BS and I know he is making a fool of her

It sounds like you are still investing lots of mental and emotional time and energy in the other man. Are you content and secure with your marriage relationship, or, do you not care? Almost get the sense that your husband and his interest is no longer relevant in your universe. What is going on with your marriage relationship? Nothing like a wayward who spends all of her time and energy focused on her former affair partner.

Lots of victim mentality. Your affair partner wasn't married to your husband.

You are an adult woman who chose to become emotionally and physically involved with another person. Lots of time, planning, energy, lies,... thousands of little acts that added up over time. Cheating on your husband is all on you. Your decision. Not your husband's.

Your affair partner made an offer. You accepted. You could have kept saying no.

Karma for what? You chose to "give in". Though his wife should know, but your reasons seem to be stemmed from the fact that you chose to get into a cheating relationship and the exit didn't pan out. I mean really, if he wasn't lying and you two ended up together breaking his family apart because you lied and believed his lies you wouldn't be scum of the Earth? You make it sound like he would have been a great guy and everything would have been okay if he had stayed with you. I have seen this here so many times. They are scum because the affair didn't pan out and the lying KISA isn't who they said they were. As if the fact that the wife cheating on her husband was entitled or allowed to do what they did only if the AP was a good guy. I guess it all would have been worth selling yourself cheap if he hadn't lied. Come on, if you want to be angry be angry at yourself. You sound emotionally invested that the "love" he claimed wasn't real. Like, since it wasn't or had been you are absolved from your own accountability. It doesn't matter how long he pursued.

It sounds like you are still invested in this relationship with your AP. I'm my opinion you need to stay as far away from that as you possibly can.

WS only

[This message edited by SI Staff at 11:54 AM, May 14th (Monday)]

You want karma and you’re feeling used. He duped you and you fell for it just like many more women will fall for it. You are not really concerned about his wife. If you cared so much about his wife you wouldn’t have fucked her over yourself. I get it you’re mad but it won’t change anything. Let.it.go.