This was my second appointment with my IC from BetterHelp, and I’m wondering if she’s going to be any help to me at all. Today I explained the A I had and the situation BH and I are in presently, a couple months post D-Day. I got done describing what happened and she said "Oh, I see… So you never actually had sex with your AP?" And I was like, "Well no, but I intended to, and I definitely had an EA, and it’s been incredibly hard on my H…" (Edited for clarity: something about the way she said it made me think she was looking to minimize the infidelity as not a "real" affair because it was discovered before the intended extramarital sex was had.)
And she also asked multiple times whether my H has "forgiven" me. I explained to her that this has been devastating for him, and I expect it will likely take years before he feels anything close to forgiveness, even if he wanted to forgive me today, but we’re trying to work towards it. It felt wrong to have to do that; I felt like the counselor instead of the one being counseled. But I guess not every IC is trained in or experienced with infidelity recovery.
I’m wondering if I wait another week and give her another chance to help me with my issues, or if I should request to change ICs.
[This message edited by DayByDay96 at 12:29 AM, Tuesday, September 16th]
