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2oldforthis ( member #19825) posted at 3:10 AM on Monday, March 14th, 2011
What am I missing? I thought this book was for the BS.
He did not see what he had in me, what I saw in him I did not have!
Love kills slowly.
jjct ( member #17484) posted at 3:13 AM on Monday, March 14th, 2011
geaux, for anyone who reads this thread, it sounds like true remorse. Maybe it was a book, for some it could be a look of a crying eye, but it sounds like true remorse. I'm so happy for you! Shhh yeah take your time on the other side of this thing...it's rare to have true remorse. When I see it on here I get hopeful. Forgive me for getting vicariously all beautiful here, I'm giddy as a clown for you.
GeauxTigers (original poster member #28301) posted at 3:23 AM on Monday, March 14th, 2011
@2old - the MacDonald book is the topic, really, and its for waywards. Apparantly, it has magical powers, lol...
@jjct- thanks. I'm pretty damn giddy myself! 
Sigh... how did I end up here?
2oldforthis ( member #19825) posted at 3:39 AM on Monday, March 14th, 2011
Ok I am off the charts today.
So she is reading How to help you S heal from the A.
That makes sence.
Thanks! Having a really bad day.
[This message edited by 2oldforthis at 9:41 PM, March 13th (Sunday)]
He did not see what he had in me, what I saw in him I did not have!
Love kills slowly.
tryingtoohard ( member #31195) posted at 3:53 AM on Monday, March 14th, 2011
That's AWESOME!!! So happy for you! Sounds like you may finally be getting somewhere is right!
Also it's great that your WW actually agreed to read it instead of acting like she didn't need it. If she's willing to face her actions head-on and acknowledge the pain that will make R A LOT easier for you! It's hard to face your mistakes so you gotta give her credit there!
Great news- keep us updated!
People are often unreasonable and self-centered. Forgive them anyway...Give the world the best you have and it may never be enough. Give your best anyway. For in the end it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway. Mother Teresa
Cee64D ( member #21836) posted at 11:32 AM on Monday, March 14th, 2011
Though Clarrissa has been remorseful from very early on, I decided to get this as an addition to my library.
Note: If you use the amazon link here, SI gets a little some'n som'n to help keep he site going..
The hardest part of forgiveness is accepting it from others...
Me BH 44
Clarrissa FWW 44
D-Day 04 Oct, 2008
Holly-Isis ( member #13447) posted at 3:09 PM on Monday, March 14th, 2011
Thanks for sharing, somehow I missed this book.
I'm impatient and did a little research. I just downloaded it as a PDF file from her site and will install it on MrH's iPad and ask him to read it ASAP. We're four years out, but while he's been remorseful, he's never done the work until recently, so maybe this will help. He keeps asking what he needs to do, but my heart has died a little @ each "wait until..." so I don't even know where to start now. Maybe this will help.
I also noticed she has some articles on her site, maybe they will help people too:
http://www.lindajmacdonald.com/articles.html
Thanks for this GT!
oh, and p.s.- The author has a combined name of xOW2 and her mother. Tiny trigger there, but I can almost laugh at it now- the irony that a book that is helping others heal from the A is written by a woman with those names. Glad there's healing somewhere
"Being in love" first moved them to promise fidelity: this quieter love enables them to keep the promise. *CS Lewis*
Lost68 ( member #27515) posted at 8:10 PM on Monday, March 14th, 2011
Man... I'm aso happy to read your post!!!
(((GT MP)))
4kidscheatinghub ( member #31203) posted at 11:40 PM on Monday, March 14th, 2011
how funny! i bought this for my WH too..didnt know if he would read or not..but then i saw how teeny and noticed he even had notes at therapy a couple of weeks ago...i think he is trying really hard but i am in so much pain it's like i cant find it in me to fully forgive and am wanting to so bad but im in serious heartbreak pain that i have never been in or knew existed!=(
Me-34years old
husband (cheater)-39
4 amazing kids
http://www.ihatehimihatehimnot.wordpress.com
Boy-12
Girl-age 10
Boy/girl twins age 6
AND IT STILL WASN'T ENOUGH!
D-DAY-2/14/11
in counseling constantly but pain is excrutiating. He wants
GeauxTigers (original poster member #28301) posted at 1:30 AM on Tuesday, March 15th, 2011
Thanks for the well wishes everybody! And you're absolutely right, 4kids, I never knew such pain could be inflicted on me by someone I love. None of us did.
Good luck everybody!
Sigh... how did I end up here?
GeauxTigers (original poster member #28301) posted at 3:05 AM on Sunday, March 27th, 2011
**BUMPDATE**
Well, its been two weeks, and we've come further in that time than in the 10 months prior. I grow more hopeful each day. She's even threatening to dip her toe back into the SI waters.
Stay tuned...
Sigh... how did I end up here?
gardenmom ( member #29036) posted at 3:16 AM on Sunday, March 27th, 2011
I have seen this book mentioned 3 or 4 times in other posts, and since we are in a triggery time frame for me, and things have been rather tense, I mentioned it to DH. He ordered it right away. He said he would do anything to figure out what he is missing and what to do to help.
I will let you know what our outcome is after he gets it and reads it.
Thanks for the recomendation.
Me-BS-35
HIM-FWH-37 (Dad6573)
2 kids
married 16 years
Dday EA 03/10
Dday PA 06/03/10
Dday whole truth 08/2011
So tired and confused. R is up to him now.
Laura28 ( member #28997) posted at 3:39 AM on Sunday, March 27th, 2011
GeauxTigers
Thanks for the recommendation. My FWH is trying but he still doesn't quite get it.
I have ordered it but because I had to get it from Amazon US it will not be here (in Australia) until April 7th. I am going away for a few days on April 10th so will leave it for him to read while I am away. He's not much of a reader but hey who knows?
Thanks for the advice. If it works great if not ...$25 (postage to Australia was more than the book 
)is a cheap price to find out he's "Just not that into me"
Thanks
Laura
Married 42yrs Me BW 68Yrs Him F?WH 70yrs OWzero 1988 EA?/PA? Gaslighted. Dday May 28 2010. OW1 1994(6mths PA, EA 16+ years). OW2 2002(8yrs PA). OW3 2009(1Yr PA). Others?? Status: Not Divorcing..but.."You can't unfuck 'em"
Tresemme ( member #31185) posted at 7:43 AM on Sunday, March 27th, 2011
thanks for post..i will get it as soon as i get paid..ty
(Me)Bw late 30s
On 5/1/10 I learned I hired a succubus as a live in nanny and that she was preg w an OC!
2019 Divorcing and in love with someone I pray is the monogamist I begged Jesus for
painpaingoaway ( member #27196) posted at 12:18 PM on Sunday, March 27th, 2011
GT,
I'm so happy I came across this thread!
Forgive me for getting vicariously all beautiful here,
That cracked me up, but I feel the same way! I'm so happy for you!
I did not realize this:
Note: If you use the amazon link here, SI gets a little some'n som'n to help keep he site going..
so I will definitely use the SI link...
The fact the book is short should definitely help in our case since FWH never seems to be able to read anything longer than a magazine article (ummm, and hunting/fishing magazines at that!).
I'm going to order it now... I will let everyone know how things work out. Ahhhh, the helpfulness of SI never ceases to amaze me! What a blessing to us all! Thank you SI magicians! Now let me go find my credit card!
D-Day June 2009
Watch my movie: "My wayward husband's adventures in STD land":
Episode 1: youtu.be/9Jv0-d_CdYc
Episode 2: http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=8Tz822H82Gk
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