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I wish and want OW to experience and go through what I am going through x10!!!

WH is already paying for what he has done for a long time to come.

[This message edited by TheTooGoodWife at 11:56 AM, October 17th (Wednesday)]

Nah I used to feel like that but really what kind of people are they.

Somehow they are damaged goods to do what they do.

I once read an analogy thats good.

You can leave the keys in your car and 100 people will pass. 1 wiil be different and try to find you and tell you. 1 will be different and steal the car.

They are thieves.

I came to realsie my anger was towards him.

She was 10 a penny I've had 3 men over my life try to seduce me to cheat I never did.

My anger is towards him.

Actually I have found myself thinking that this is sp profoundly painful I would not even wish it on her.

I owe that slut nothing

That's probably what the OW thought when they were messing around w/our WH.

Don't get me wrong, I'm no where near forgiving the POS, mow. I just can't stand having all this anger.

When my WH calls her a whore, I ask him what does that make you?

Are our WS really any better than the AP?

It takes 2 to have an A.

Are our WS really any better than the AP?

Yes, in our case, absolutely. Because over the past year, JM has done an unbelievable amount of work to mend the damage he caused. He has apologized to me over and over. Just last night, he sent me a sweet text that ended with, "I am sorry for all of the horrible things that I did to you." Every single day he does something to try to make amends.

Whoreible has never said she was sorry for anything. She still sees herself as a victim and me as an abusive bitch who deserved everything that happened. (Even though she has never met me)

I have loved JM for 16 years. It's hard to go from that to hate. Whoreible...nothing but contempt, hate, disgust. Nothing positive to pull from.

I'll add this, too. 20 years ago today was the dday of my 1st H (XWH, also known as That Giant Asshole) and his OW who is now his wife. I tried to be decent and "mature" in dealing with them, only to have the deepest, most personal part of my life used by that bitch as a weapon against me. After having no contact with our ds for his entire life until this past spring, the Giant Asshole popped up, flew my ds to Arkansas for a week, filled his head full of all these promises of staying involved in his life, then dropped off the fucking planet again. Did not even acknowledge the boy's 21st birthday last week.

Yeah, I hate them both. I hope their house floods and gets infested with mutant termites and bedbugs and some sort of crotch fungus that eats their genitals off.

I owe that slut nothing

That's probably what the OW thought when they were messing around w/our WH.

You think the OW thought you were a slut and you deserved to be cheated on, carey? I don't understand your logic there.

Rationalizations and justifications for WS's to cheat can not be compared to the reasons why a BS's choses not to forgive an AP. imo

When my WH calls her a whore, I ask him what does that make you?

It makes them a slut, too. ( I reserve the word "whore" for professionals! Where they actually do it for money.) However, hopefully they are remorseful and are working hard to fix the issues they have that enabled them to behave in such a way.

t/j

carey,

In my case, the slut didn't give two shits about me. She knew about me, knew my fiance wasn't going to cheat on me, and she pursued anyway.

My F made the mistake of buying into the "friendship" she was offering. She always steered their conversations to "Oh your GF is SO lucky, most guys would cheat if they had the chance" blah blah blah.

He got drunk one night and called her---they talked about porn, sexual acts, sexual positions--and then she invited him over. He realized that she wasn't his friend and that he shouldn't be speaking to her in that manner. He hung up, and tried to distance himself from her.

When she wouldn't go away,and after he got a DUI he told me.

So, no, I don't owe her forgiveness. I don't owe her anything.

And yes, I do belive my F is better than she is. Why? Because he has worked very hard over the last 4 yrs to prove that he IS trustworthy, that he DOES have good boundaries, and that he IS the man I thought he was.

You know what she did? She moved down to the next seat in the bar, and started hitting on the next guy with a wedding band on.

So, I get your point that it takes two to tango, it does. But for ME, for my relationship, it only took HIM to show me that it would never happen again. HE worked for and deserved my forgiveness.

I don't care what she does. I don't care WHO she does. It is, however, my right to hate her for trying to step into MY life, and I don't have to forgive her for it. Ever.

end t/j

You think the OW thought you were a slut and you deserved to be cheated on, carey? I don't understand your logic there.

No SisterMilkshake, I mean that the OW probably felt the same regarding not owing the BS anything.

My WS justified why he thought he was entitled to having an A, so, I figure the AP does the same.

Rationalizations and justifications for WS's to cheat can not be compared to the reasons why a BS's choses not to forgive an AP. imo

I agree. I'm not saying any BS has to forgive the AP! I haven't even done so myself.

Another barren OW. At least she isn't passing her legacy onto off-spring. I think being a predatory OW is her MO. She's single and spends every evening at the bar.

There is no thing to like about her. She is pathetic. Together they were a mess. Thank God he saw the light and is disgusted by his behavior.

OW are pathetic creatures aren't they? My WH's OW deserves every bad thing coming to her.

Her karma has been attacking her since she decided to have an A. First she lost her job, then she lost her lover (my WH), her and her BH became evicted, and not sure if her BH is divorcing her or not I do know she gets beat up by him.

Last I heard she was trying to contact my WH's partner crying about how she has no one to talk to. Boo hoo her KISA isn't there to save her anymore.

P-A-T-H-E-T-I-C is all I can say. My life is so much more rich (not money just in general) than hers. She'll never be me... ever and that gives me the greatest joy!

But yeah I still hate that bitch.

[This message edited by crazyblindsided at 4:36 PM, October 17th (Wednesday)]

When a single female long divorced from a husband who obviously didn't want her because he discovered he had married a c**t, and an empty one at that, goes out of her way to stalk and persue a man she is FULLY AWARE is married, relentlessly, then they get what's coming to them one way or another, and I intend to have a ringside seat when that happens! I might even throw a bloody great stone of my own!

My FWH has certainly been far from an angel, and readily accepts his responsibility and lives every day with what he did to me (and tells me how much it hurts him that he crucified me in the worst way), I don't see why the fuck she should get off scot free!

[This message edited by Diva0702 at 4:41 PM, October 17th (Wednesday)]

I am with all of you.

I know that after all these years that I should be indifferent to the MOW/serial cheater. And most of the time I do not waste my time thinking about her.

But, I too still have my moments.

I know that the majority of my anger etc. should be directed at my FWH but he has been extremely remorseful from day one and has begged and pleaded for forgiveness.

The MOW had zero remorse.

She laughed about it all and made fun of me and my grief.

The fact that this was not her first LTA always got to me also.

She was not an innocent victim-she was a serial predator.

She had been cheating on her husband for over 30 years!

And she always targeted married co-workers.

She had dealt with a d-day with her own husband over 25 yrs ago when he found out about her first LTA!

And was she remorseful?

Did she try to change her ways?

No......

She continued interfering with other women's marriages and pursuing married men.

And she did pursue.

I have email evidence that would curl your hair.

It took one year of her pursuing my husband with all kinds of sexual come-ons.

This was a game for her.

That's why I still harbor ill feelings for her.

I am much better though.

Not obsessing about her like I did in that first year post d-day.

Most of the time I do not dwell on her.

But,I have to admit that I still enjoyed reading the comments!

You are all remarkable,strong, gifted and amazonian in your tenacity to be better than those filthy whoring bitches who think it's their right to just take what doesn't belong to them. and I am so glad I have you here, right now, beside me, sharing my loathing and showing me yours.

I have all the same feelings.

In my case the OW pretended to be my friend. She was part of a social group my husband and I were in.

She knew we were married as I was pregnant the entire time the affair was happening. We even hung out with her an her husband on a regular basis. She helped ruin what was supposed to be the happiest time of my life. We have many mutual friend who post pics with her in it and they invite us to the same places. Not only am I angry about what happend with my husband but I also feel that I am losing friends because she is always at the events. Even when I have asked her to not be there she sometimes shows up anyway.

Now she is probably pregnant with my husbands baby which means she will be attached to me in some way for the rest of my life. Worst part is she doesn't think she did anything wrong and hasn't apologized for any of it. According to her my, husband did this to me and not her. She must have lost control of her vagina for a year.

I hope she finds someone who she loves as much as I loved my husband and then someone like her comes along and destroys her world.

Thank you all for letting me know I'm not alone.

Hell freakin' yeah I'm angry with my h for cheating on me. That's an understatement. However, I must point out h told the truth when asked.H has been remorseful from the beginning. H tries to mend this shitstorm , and make things right between us. Even when I'm not. H is the man he used to be.

The price I've paid for the man I have now was very high. The currency was my everything. I feel guilty sometimes because he's working on himself, and being present ... and I'm livid. Not always but when it hits me. When I stop and think about the lies.The betrayal. That he had sex with her? I can cheerfully strangle him.

Yes. He betrayed me. He was a selfish asswipe.

She was his co-worker, but I knew her because I worked there part time. She was also a customer of mine. But... what they did they did. H ended it. Then 2 months of emails and texts that I found of her begging for more.

The point is it was over and she doesn't accept it.

She always finds a way to let me know she is still out there waiting for him.

What is important to me is what h will do. Not her mooning over h. That's her trip. I hate her because she tries to hurt me .I hate her because of everything real and imagined. I hate her period.

According to her my, husband did this to me and not her. She must have lost control of her vagina for a year.

Why do these trashy OWs think this way? They must not have control of their vaginas

My WH's OW told me "Why are you mad at me, I never did anything to you!"

[This message edited by crazyblindsided at 6:31 PM, October 17th (Wednesday)]

Dear OUME, I'm sorry the wench is crawling around your head.

I agree with Diva0702!

The nasty vindictive whores need a taste of the injustice inflicted on us by them to be returned like the plague, to them, ten fold!

Multiply that by 100!

I'm D but I think if OW stays with my ex that will be revenge enough!

He is NPD and I wouldn't wish that on anyone.. not even OW, but then she went for it!

Good luck to her

she will need it.

She must have lost control of her vagina for a year.

OMG!!! This is hysterical!!!

To carey's points and the ensuing discussion about OP/WS similarities/differences...

When I've called the OP in my situation xyz combination of absolutely denigrating terms, my H has said, "but isn't that me, then?" And I would say in the early months, "yup!"

We've had good solid discussions about the fact that we don't know what the OP is doing. She may be working on R with her partner, she may be doing all the amazing things that my WH is doing. And so maybe, if I no longer want to bash him because I've seen progress, maybe I need to let go of the OP bashing? At best, she's fixing herself. At worst, I don't fucking care anymore and she's not worth the energy or negativity.

The OP has been NC with us and us with her from the get-go. No fishing, no anything. This makes it a lot easier for me to post the semi-zen bullshit I just did above.