SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

I was raised in a very devout family. Most or all of my moral compass values come from that faith.

I have led a good and proper life. Ive never stolen anything or deliberately hurt another person. Ive never cheated on any girl friend.

So why did this happen to me? Why wasnt Got watching? Why wasnt God there? Why did God allow this to happen to me?

I see bad people often have little or no consequences for their actions. Cheaters prosper while good people suffer.

Yes. This whole thing has affected my faith. I no longer attend church or consider my self a catholic. All of that seems a fraud to me now.

Not once.

In fact, we are closer than ever. I ask for help now. Help me through this, Lord. Help us heal.

Mine was bc OW passed herself off as a devout Christian. WH said she spouted religion the entire time they were committing adultery. I know I shouldn't let her idiocy affect ME, but I must confess it left a bad taste in my mouth. I posted about it and some great people helped me adjust my attitude. So, things are better now, but not yet back to normal. Hopefully soon.

It hasn't affected my belief in God or the power of prayer luckily. I was thrilled when WH revealed the other day that he has started saying a little prayer before we talk. He asks God to help him "not screw this up". lol

Thank you ALL for your responses. I truly appreciate every one. I am somewhat better today. We went to the homeless shelter and had a great time serving others. My daughter had missed the past two months and it was good to have her there. She really enjoys preparing the food and then serving it up.

Someone mentioned the book of Job. Yes ,I have read it at least twice. A little more of my story.

I live over ,1,000 miles from where I grew up. Had only a couple of friends in the city when I got sick from a rare disease. Spent one month in the Hospital before they told me either surgery or your life. Five hour surgery. During the surgery I saw a bright light. Felt giddy but did not see any thing or anyone. Doctor told my family that they had almost lost me once during the surgery and had shocked me back to life. I went from running 7 minutes miles and lifting 200+ lbs to not even being able to sit up in bed by myself. My Mom had to lift me every morning as if I was a three month old.

I met my WW at the lake while biking to rebuild my leg strength. It was the only time she had been at the lake all year and I would not have been there had I not gotten sick. What's even stranger is I bought a soda and that where we met. I once owned a concession business with two other guys but I would never have gone to buy a pop when I was only 10 minutes from home. I think I told myself at the time, "you almost died, so what is the use of saving a buck over 10 minutes"

WW had a daughter who was six at the time and now she is 28. I raised her as my own and paid for 100% of her College. She has a really good career now but she lives two time zones away. The daughter that we had together will graduate from HS in a month and she was to go away to College. WW family is here and they have cut all contact with me. Once my daughter leaves I will be all alone again, right back to where I was 20 years ago. I am late 50's. Could never get another job anywhere else as good as the one I have.

Someone already posted that they were happy that God took them away from a person who did not deserve them. To my WW credit, she actually said that to me. That I deserved someone else. Not wanting to throw a pity party but I just was hoping to have a different life at this stage of my life.

Thanks again for the encouragement!!!

I just was hoping to have a different life at this stage of my life

None of us did ! I was 52 at the time of dday. I stopped my career 10 yrs before so we could semi-retire. This was a second marriage and we were married 26 yrs at time of divorce.

Now at almost 57, I'm starting over completely. Bought a different house in a different state that I won't live in for years and ours was paid for the last 7 yrs of our marriage. No career left so had to try something completely new. Very scary when you don't what the hell your doing half the time.

No one to share my victories with and my defeats. I also am a transplant. I do have my DD39, DSS34, and grandsons here but too expensive here to retire. Retirement security is gone but so is the husband that had me living a lie.

Somehow (I believe it's the Grace of God ) I'm OK and believe my future will be just fine.

Gma

I just was hoping to have a different life at this stage of my life.

I hear you. It's not fair and that sucks.

Hugs.

I'll chime in. My faith has not been wavered at all. I do not believe God would take my ExH and say here's a new woman for you or God brought them together. Sorry I just can't see it. One thing a lot tend to forget, people have a free will, we all make choices, good or bad. Do I believe God has someone out there for me now? Maybe, Maybe not. Its not up to God to bring two people together, can the circumstances mingle sure, can a road bring two people yeah. But all in all, we each have feelings emotions and free will to choose. I didn't choose for my Ex to leave and hear how a friend says oh God brought them together..Hogwash.

So, just remember we each walk in our path of faith no matter what that is, just know we as humans have free will, God can not go against free will, at least thats my belief.

WH said she spouted religion the entire time they were committing adultery

For me personally, this experience has caused me to have to rely almost entirely on my faith because without God I don't know how I could possibly get through this.

My WW told me 2 weeks prior to D-Day that she hadn't prayed in over 2 years and that she hadn't felt love from me in a long time.

On D-Day was the first time we prayed together as a couple. It was an encouraging start to our R, but we've still got a long way to go. For me...it's accepting the A and being able to leave the past in the past...for her, its accepting that I had completely withdrawn from the M myself and that this whole experience has caused me to have a genuine reevaluation of my priorities. It really felt like a 180.

While we have our struggles...last night was a perfect example...we're only 3 weeks in and I feel like we're working well on the R.