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Newest Member: mkei

Reconciliation :
Confrontation tonight- need some support

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Dawnie ( member #26912) posted at 1:53 PM on Friday, November 15th, 2013

((Wondertwin)) I am so sorry for your pain, you dont deserve it.

DIVORCED! Remarried to a real man!
BW (me) - 41 (now 48)
WH (him) - 43 (now 50)
OW - 23 yr old foreign gold digging whore looking for her American meal ticket
1 14 yr old son (now 21)
married 20 years/together 25 years
D day - 9/23/2009 5pm

posts: 815   ·   registered: Dec. 23rd, 2009   ·   location: Mid Atlantic coast
id 6562859
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knolls ( member #39242) posted at 2:08 PM on Friday, November 15th, 2013

Just thinking of you.

I am stronger than the storm.
I take every experience in my life, no matter how horrendous it was, as a learning experience

posts: 81   ·   registered: May. 13th, 2013
id 6562881
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FaithFool ( member #20150) posted at 3:05 PM on Friday, November 15th, 2013

I slowly lost my mind one sentence at a time.

Oh WT, I have been there and it is awful, truly horrific, I know *exactly * how you're feeling today.

Big hugs to you. It's a long road ahead. Take care of yourself first.

DDay: June 15, 2008
Mistakenly married Mr. Superfreak
20 years of OWs, WTF?
Divorced Dec 26, 2011
"Life is a shipwreck, but we must not forget
to sing in the lifeboats". -- Voltaire

posts: 21593   ·   registered: Jul. 7th, 2008   ·   location: Canada
id 6562971
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tushnurse ( member #21101) posted at 4:01 PM on Friday, November 15th, 2013

((((WT))))

I can tell you that when we had a similar event is when the fog really started to lift for my H. Pay attention to the actions.

You are doing what's best for you, taking care of you, finding some joy in your kids, and just getting through each day as they come.

Remember this is all on him. He chose this, and he caused this. It's up to him to start the work of fixing it. If he doesn't then you will be better, stronger, and happier without him.

((((and strength))))

Me: FBSHim: FWSKids: 23 & 27 Married for 32 years now, was 16 at the time.D-Day Sept 26 2008R'd in about 2 years. Old Vet now.

posts: 20380   ·   registered: Oct. 1st, 2008   ·   location: St. Louis
id 6563045
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silverhopes ( member #32753) posted at 5:02 PM on Friday, November 15th, 2013

(((Wondertwin)))

Aut viam inveniam aut faciam.

posts: 5270   ·   registered: Jul. 12th, 2011   ·   location: California
id 6563193
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jo2love ( member #31528) posted at 5:29 PM on Friday, November 15th, 2013

(((Wondertwin)))

posts: 51035   ·   registered: Mar. 16th, 2011
id 6563234
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sisoon ( Moderator #31240) posted at 5:34 PM on Friday, November 15th, 2013

I think you're very wise to just let yourself be at this point, wt.

Have some faith in yourself. You've got a lot of inner resources, and you've got a strong desire to heal. You may not be able to describe what you need right now, but it'll come to you, in all probability.

fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex apDDay - 12/22/2010Recover'd and R'edYou don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.

posts: 31115   ·   registered: Feb. 18th, 2011   ·   location: Illinois
id 6563242
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Blobette ( member #36519) posted at 5:57 PM on Friday, November 15th, 2013

I'm so sorry. We all know how awful the pain is. We're all holding your hands right now. Feel our strength.

BS (me): 51
WS: 52
Married: 27 yrs
Kids: 2
OW: Co-worker, 7 yr LTA
DD 8/1/2012, Working on R

posts: 1064   ·   registered: Aug. 17th, 2012
id 6563267
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anv5 ( member #39217) posted at 6:17 PM on Friday, November 15th, 2013

(((((Wondertwin)))))

I wish I had words of wisdom but I don't all. I have is support of I have been there too...& I feel another one will come but cling to the hope that he really did come clean this last time. You can & will get through this

BS(me)30
WH 29
1 Child
Married 11 yrs
D-Day: 4/9/13 he cheated in '08 & now + trickle truth & tons of lies 6/27 Found more, swears I really do have the whole truth now.
2/2/14 found out more...it seems the TT never ends.
Trying to R

posts: 71   ·   registered: May. 9th, 2013
id 6563295
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Skan ( member #35812) posted at 5:01 PM on Saturday, November 16th, 2013

I'm glad that he opened up. I pray that this is it the entire truth. It is exactly like going back to DDay. Actually, it can be even worse IMO, because having once mustered the strength to try to go on, you're left with another empty, gaping hole, and less energy and desire to pick yourself up again. I think that you're wise to take a couple of days to just process, let your brain start to actually begin to function again. (((hugs)))

Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.

D-Day, June 10, 2012


posts: 11513   ·   registered: Jun. 11th, 2012   ·   location: So California
id 6564238
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