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Fun & Games :
Fun with teenagers

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Aubrie ( member #33886) posted at 6:40 PM on Tuesday, February 11th, 2014

Two words: Balloon animals.

"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - J. Wayne

posts: 7926   ·   registered: Nov. 11th, 2011
id 6681040
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tushnurse ( member #21101) posted at 8:03 PM on Tuesday, February 11th, 2014

This thread is great. I'm getting looks as to why I'm howling with laughter.

I too torture my kids with stories and information that they cannot even begin to believe. Having worked for a colorectal surgeon I have seen and heard it all. Things we have retrieved, and the stories of how they got there are always fun when their friends are over.

Me: FBSHim: FWSKids: 23 & 27 Married for 32 years now, was 16 at the time.D-Day Sept 26 2008R'd in about 2 years. Old Vet now.

posts: 20380   ·   registered: Oct. 1st, 2008   ·   location: St. Louis
id 6681193
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TrulyReconciled ( member #3031) posted at 8:17 PM on Tuesday, February 11th, 2014

So long as you emphasize safe sex ...

"In a time of deceit, telling the Truth is a revolutionary act."

posts: 22740   ·   registered: Dec. 29th, 2003   ·   location: Hell and back, way back :o)
id 6681219
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itainteasy ( member #31094) posted at 8:17 PM on Tuesday, February 11th, 2014

t/j

tushnurse, I used to work as a phleb in a prison. There was one inmate who came to the infirmary complaining of stomach pain, and of not being able to poop for a week. He asked for a laxative and said he'd "be ok". He freaked out when the doctor ordered an xray.

Kept saying "I'm just a little backed up, doc, that's all it is, just a really hard poop."

Turned out to be a shampoo bottle. Suave, to be exact. In the bottle were rusty files.

The guy had to be airlifted to the hospital for emergency surgery. (we were told about the files in the bottle after the guy was returned to the prison)

He really thought a laxative would help him poop out the bottle.

And that, is hands down, the most interesting story I ever got from working there. The Xray was amazing to see, as well.

end t/j

posts: 3446   ·   registered: Feb. 4th, 2011   ·   location: NWPA
id 6681222
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broken2 ( member #16935) posted at 8:18 PM on Tuesday, February 11th, 2014

This is hilarious SI'ers.

posts: 2059   ·   registered: Nov. 8th, 2007
id 6681224
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 HFSSC (original poster member #33338) posted at 9:05 PM on Tuesday, February 11th, 2014

T/J

(can you T/J your own thread??)

One of the jokes I told them last night was this:

There was a proctologist that had a male patient who was in love with him. The guy was constantly hitting on the doctor and finally, the doctor said, "Look, this is inappropriate and I cannot continue to be your doctor if you are going to keep harassing me. You need to find another doctor." Later that weekend, the doctor gets a call from the ER. A proctological emergency requires his attention. Doctor gets there, and of course, it's the patient who has been harassing him. Deciding to be professional, the doctor enters the room and prepares for the exam. As he is looking up this guy's butthole, he asks the nurse for some forceps. And then he says, "My God, man, you've got a dozen long stemmed roses up your ass!"

The guy gasps, "Read the card! Read the card!!"

Me, 56
Him, 48 (JMSSC)
Married 26 years. Reconciled.

posts: 4971   ·   registered: Sep. 12th, 2011   ·   location: South Carolina
id 6681288
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TrulyReconciled ( member #3031) posted at 9:09 PM on Tuesday, February 11th, 2014

Being a guy, he probably didn't have the florist strip off the thorns either ...

[This message edited by TrulyReconciled at 3:10 PM, February 11th (Tuesday)]

"In a time of deceit, telling the Truth is a revolutionary act."

posts: 22740   ·   registered: Dec. 29th, 2003   ·   location: Hell and back, way back :o)
id 6681294
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Holly-Isis ( member #13447) posted at 10:39 PM on Tuesday, February 11th, 2014

I *must* work harder at embarrassing my teen!

BTW- I taught my daughter to use the word vulva when talking about her (visible) genitals. We haven't had much cause yet to add information about vaginas...but she's 9 so I should talk soon.

This means of course that DS hears the information too. We also use the word penis. But as he's gotten older, he substitutes the proper term for euphemisms. This could be a good way to make him squirm...just use the proper terms.

"Being in love" first moved them to promise fidelity: this quieter love enables them to keep the promise. *CS Lewis*

posts: 11713   ·   registered: Jan. 26th, 2007   ·   location: Just a fool in limbo
id 6681425
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kernel ( member #27035) posted at 11:11 PM on Tuesday, February 11th, 2014

And I thought I was bad when I made my son read the book (complete with anatomically correct pictures) that I gave him about the birds and the bees. You people are merciless! My son would never TALK when we tried to have the sex talks with him, so the book made sure he got the accurate information. Turns out that book made the rounds of several of his friends. Not a one of them had a child in high school, so I call that a win. Keep on embarrassing them - any way they can get the information is good. I would imagine they sure won't forget it when you're delivering it in such a unique way!

"On particularly rough days when I'm sure I can't possibly endure, I like to remind myself that my track record for getting through bad days so far is 100% and that's pretty good."

posts: 5379   ·   registered: Jan. 3rd, 2010   ·   location: Midwest
id 6681474
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Harriet ( member #34543) posted at 7:52 AM on Wednesday, February 12th, 2014

And there is always the first time they ask you how babies are made...my little tiny angels in the back seat of the car listening quietly to my answer... silence...then a tiny voice, "You and dad did that?" and the other one replying, "That's just wrong."

D-Day Spring 2008
3 years false R
Divorce Final 6/7/12

posts: 849   ·   registered: Jan. 14th, 2012   ·   location: California
id 6682002
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Holly-Isis ( member #13447) posted at 11:10 AM on Wednesday, February 12th, 2014

A year or so ago the kids were talking about sex in the car. DS- four years older than DD said

"Mom and dad don't do that! They're good Christians!"

It was his little sister that informed him, yes they do.

Then we had to have the talk that nothing is shameful about having sex. I think he preferred to believe we only had sex twice.

"Being in love" first moved them to promise fidelity: this quieter love enables them to keep the promise. *CS Lewis*

posts: 11713   ·   registered: Jan. 26th, 2007   ·   location: Just a fool in limbo
id 6682051
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jo2love ( member #31528) posted at 3:54 PM on Wednesday, February 12th, 2014

These are priceless.

A friend of mine (let's call her C) and I were helping out in our kid's school. Her son asked to borrow money to order a valentine gift from the student council (that will be delivered to another student on Friday). She wouldn't give him $ without seeing who the girl was.

So C walks into the lunchroom with her son. In front of a couple hundred kids, C makes her son point at the girl he has a crush on. His cheeks were bright pink. He was so embarrassed.

posts: 51035   ·   registered: Mar. 16th, 2011
id 6682308
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