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Gotmegood ( member #41407) posted at 7:34 PM on Wednesday, April 2nd, 2014
Funny, I just had a discussion with WH about the injustice of adultery.
I pointed out to him that there were essentially 3 people involved in his choice: 1. The prostitute benefitted by receiving ego boosting compliments as she paraded around naked and acted excited and happy. Plus she got the $$$
2. POS WH benefitted by having his voyeuristic desires sated by watching the naked 20 yr old cockroach parade around naked and tell him how excited she was to be with HIM; plus he had an orgasm.
3. I was collateral damage. Initial blow to my self-esteem was a mortal blow. Undescribable psychic pain. And all the rest.
The summary is 2 winners and one big loser, me. The most unfair scenario one can dream up. His response: no, really two losers, but you were hurt the worst, I know that now. Well, it's some consolation, but I wonder constantly, in the long haul will I ever get over it?
Me: faithful wife 62.
Him: WH 64 , prostitute 20 yr old
DDay: 8-13-2013
Status: boinging up and down like a yo-yo
krispy47 (original poster member #42863) posted at 3:47 PM on Thursday, April 3rd, 2014
I have to believe that we WILL get past it, if not ever over it. Recovering from this is SO much like recovering from the death of my son 18 years ago -- same roller coaster of numbness, sorrow, rage, grief, self-recrimination -- all of it! But I know from that experience that in time, if you work through all of those feelings, you come to a place where the huge awful thing you will never get past becomes just one more fact of your life. You will always feel a little sad about it, but it won't define you any more.
Hang in there.
Me: 47 WH: 48
Married 22 years, 4 kids
DDay: 3/5/14, 7 yr LTA plus rising ONS body count
Status: currently riding the coaster from hell
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