SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

I went to where I proposed 20 yrs ago. Took it off and chucked it into the pond. It's just a piece of metal now.

This was hard for me, too. People would comment on it because I wore it so long. One person checked every time I used to visit...I don't visit him anymore.

I still have the rings but what helped was a replacement I bought with my own money.

When the first occassions came around, I went and picked out a ring for myself that would be valentine and b'day gift combo on the first anniversary. It helped with that transition.

I may give my engagement ring to my daughter some day. Or sell it. Right now it feels like it's on fire if I touch it. So it stays in a drawer and I do not look.

ETA it was always a symbol for me of being in a couple. The weight of it reminded me often that I was part of something bigger than myself.

But, I still am. I just have to look harder in life to find where I belong. I think as a single person, it's harder to do.

[This message edited by Ashland13 at 7:36 PM, May 10th (Saturday)]

^ yep - one of my questions was did you wear your ring while fucking her?

Asked same question. He told me he wore it so she would know that he was never going to leave his wife. It was like he was proud to tell me he had put up these boundaries while he continued to fuck her for over 6 years. Well, thank you! That was a damn comfort for me.

As for my rings I sold the false R ring. The original engagement ring is too puny (well that is somewhat symbolic)to be worth much!

the teenager was still living with her mother when they started. I asked him if he wore his ring in front of her mother. He insisted that he did, but admitted to his sister that he didn't.

there was a point in this mess after DDay that I was trying to make it work, and he was insisting that he had to have both of us that he lost his ring. I knew right then that he was taking it off with her. how else would he not notice it missing for hours? (ironically, it turned out to be in the garbage)

I thought that toilet was a good place for mine. Flushed it that night.

These posts are incredible. Thanks for responding.

I took my rings out and wore them. I left my house with them on. I felt like an imposter. All this time I felt so naked without them. The rings were symbols of the vows and the love. All broken now. My nakedness was really me starting this new life he forced me to live. The rings aren't a part of it anymore.

So, the rings are beautiful. Always were. Always will be. They are worth quite a bit of money. I can never wear them again because, in truth, despite their monetary value, they are worthless to me. And the genuine value to me was that my wearing those rings represented to the world that I was married and loved and I loved someone enough to commit my life to him.

The solid genuine value is me being true to myself. I will never, ever, ever let someone treat me with such disrespect and disregard again.

I don't need to wear a ring to know that I was faithful. I'm worth so much more than that.

I sold mine back in January when I knew it was over. I have the funds saved to buy something or celebrate when D is final. I just took what the jeweler offered. I just didn't want to prolong the process trying to get a better price someplace else. Strange thing is that WW wanted out but is now prolonging the process because she does not want to split our assets 50/50. She is driving up legal fees mindlessly.

[This message edited by WestMonroe91 at 7:22 PM, May 11th (Sunday)]

I wore mine, but because of the weight loss for the divorce diet. It slipped off while floating/swimming down a river. I didn't notice it till I got out.

I didn't even have the chance to pawn it off

You're an interesting species, an interesting mix. You're capable of such beautiful dreams and such horrible nightmares. You feel so lost, so cut off, so alone, only you're not. See, in all our searching, the only thing we've found that makes the emptiness bearable is each other. - Contact

The solid genuine value is me being true to myself. I will never, ever, ever let someone treat me with such disrespect and disregard again.

Nice, IslandGirl. You get an A+

WH and I still haven't officially publicly declared separation and divorce except to just a few friends and family. So I still wear mine when on lunch dates with old mutual friends and to some school and sport events, but honestly it feels tight and uncomfortable. I feel like I'm lying wearing it. I don't wear it when I work out, so people haven't asked since I'm in yoga or hiking pants a lot. I noticed WH took his off more lately too. I'm not sure what I will do with it. It is valuable, being listed as an asset. I did chuck it at him early on in our discovery, that felt good.