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Newest Member: FaithGrace

Just Found Out :
he abused my kids....wow...

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Jrazz ( member #31349) posted at 7:53 AM on Saturday, July 19th, 2014

I'm so horrified for you and your sweet kids. You are their champion and I'm so proud of you for all the hard work you are doing on their behalf.

Sending good thoughts, prayers, and love to you and your children.

(((teeghan)))

"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." - Deeply Scared's mom

posts: 29076   ·   registered: Feb. 28th, 2011   ·   location: California
id 6877865
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bigskyblues ( member #36759) posted at 11:19 AM on Saturday, July 19th, 2014

Teegahn, I don't have a lot to say other than you and your children are in my thoughts and prayers!

I wish you and your little ones the best!

BSB

BH 50s
xWW 50s

Dday1 7-2012
Dday2 8-2012
Divorce 9-2012

4 kids all adults.

Married 22+ years.

I have moved on and life is good!

posts: 277   ·   registered: Sep. 8th, 2012
id 6877923
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simplydevastated ( member #25001) posted at 12:52 PM on Saturday, July 19th, 2014

I would love to be in that room when the question them. With all the evidence you have how can deny or justify it.

They are monsters.

I'm keeping you and your babies in my thoughts and prayers.

(((Hugs)))

Me - BS, 40 (I'm not old...I'm vintage)
Two Wonderful children - DS11, DD8
Getting my ducks in a row for divorce... finally (4+ D-Days too many - listed in profile.)

posts: 6121   ·   registered: Jul. 31st, 2009   ·   location: In the darkest depths of hell!
id 6877945
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Jomarion ( member #43659) posted at 11:22 PM on Saturday, July 19th, 2014

Teeghan, I am speechless. I can't offer much advice except to keep a diary, journal anything else your kids say, also document what they say emotionally. It may help your case.

You are taking such good care of your kids. Remember to take care of yourself too. Your self-care will help them in the long run.

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your brave, intelligent children.

me:BGF, 54, American immigrant. one son. me and my ex get along great, the most amicable split imaginable!
him:WBF,43, Polish immigrant
together since 2006,
DDay:October28,2009,after his 3 teen kids push him to cheat with OW.
5 betrayed me

posts: 298   ·   registered: Jun. 8th, 2014   ·   location: UK
id 6878399
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dmari ( member #37215) posted at 12:08 AM on Sunday, July 20th, 2014

(((((teeghan and children)))))

posts: 2868   ·   registered: Oct. 21st, 2012
id 6878426
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TheGivingTree ( member #43672) posted at 1:35 AM on Sunday, July 20th, 2014

Nothing to add except that my heart hurts for your babies. I am pretty sure I would become violent if someone hurt my kids.

Me: FBW, 50. Him: SAFWH, 59
3 fantastic kids: DS 18, DS 17, DD 12
DDay 1: 1/8/13, multiple DDays with TT for an entire year.

Working hard at R. No, strike that. I give up. We're heading for D.
If all you wanted was love, why would you use

posts: 198   ·   registered: Jun. 10th, 2014   ·   location: San Francisco
id 6878470
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Skan ( member #35812) posted at 3:23 AM on Sunday, July 20th, 2014

Gods below, lady. I wish to hell I was in your neck of the woods to bring you dinner and a bottle of wine. (((hugs)))

Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.

D-Day, June 10, 2012


posts: 11513   ·   registered: Jun. 11th, 2012   ·   location: So California
id 6878543
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Nature_Girl ( member #32554) posted at 3:37 AM on Sunday, July 20th, 2014

Stay strong, Mama! ((((HUGS)))

Me = BS
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - DIVORCED!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJgjyDFfJuU

posts: 10722   ·   registered: Jun. 21st, 2011   ·   location: USA
id 6878553
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nekorb ( member #40306) posted at 4:43 AM on Sunday, July 20th, 2014

WTF teeghan!

You just remember to breathe and stay right where you are when the urge to beat the ever living shit out of your ex and his mom starts to become unbearable. The kids need you not to be in jail once their POS father is incarcerated.

What a horrific experience for your babies. I am so, so sorry that happened and hope that this incident will keep him away from them for a very long time.

He's a horrible person.

YOU are an awesome mom. You hang in there. You can do this. High road, honey.

Me: BS 44; Him: WH 47 M - 22 Years
D-day: 7/2013; D filed 7/2014; Divorced 7-27-16
...the WS affair starts off in a dreamland where everything is all Golly, Wow! and Meant To Be! and Soul Mates drop from the trees to frolic in the mist. -devotedman

posts: 5796   ·   registered: Aug. 13th, 2013
id 6878596
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 teeghan (original poster member #40859) posted at 2:51 PM on Sunday, July 20th, 2014

Thank you all for the thoughts...

Oh I have had to fight the urge to just go and take justice into my own hands...trust me....

It has now been 16 days later - and MY SON still has marks very visible all over his legs, and his ankles and tops of his feet.... I just do not understand how someone can do that to a child..... I look at my kids, and I cant even spank them...let alone draw blood from head to toe like that.

I have been keeping a journal with all info they give me and when. I also make note about what our discussion was about, what their demanor was (crying, panic attack, sleeples nights - we have had a lot of sleepless nights this week) etc. I continue to take UPDATED pics as well so that you can see that even 16 days later - the spots on my son have still not healed. 16 days later..... WTF......

The detective is to come out to the house this week to talk to my kids. My son wrote a letter to my daughter the other day telling her he was sorry. He kept saying I know you are probably sad and I am very sorry. I asked him why he wrote it, and he said because he couldnt protect her. It broke my heart. And I told him I was sorry that I had not been there to protect both of them either as they do not deserve this. It literally makes me feel SICK. I will let you know how this week goes with detectives and with interview of the grandmother and him. That interview wont be until a week from today as the grandmother is on vacation until saturday. Glad to see they get to enjoy themselves while my kids are here suffering physically and emotionally.

I was told they will bring her in, *interview her* and then probably go after a warrant while she waits in the interview room - as most of said, with these injuries there is no real getting out of this. I also have to find out when they will be going after him for the other stuff that he did as well.

My daughter did inform me that she begged nightly to go home and was told you cant go home. Then was yelled at because she was "home" and she told him no she wasnt. Then she begged nightly to call her mom and they told her no that she couldnt speak to mommy. They kept telling her I was alseep and she said well wake her up, she told me I could call and they flat out told her no. The only times they were allowed to call me was around 7pm each night when he would school them before they called and threatened to get a spanking if they didnt keep it short, and that they were having a blast. I kept asking if all was ok because they were very quiet and they kept saying yes they just missed me. I get so upset and teary eyed thinking about them sitting on the other end of the phone not being able to really tell me they need help.

I am going to be filing in junvenile court as well to have any and all rights removed due to neglect, abuse, and best interest of the children.

Thank you all again for letting me vent - I do not really have anyone in my real life I can truly vent to so it is nice to be able to let it out here. Thank you!

posts: 111   ·   registered: Oct. 2nd, 2013   ·   location: Georgia
id 6878803
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nekorb ( member #40306) posted at 3:04 PM on Sunday, July 20th, 2014

Teeghan I cannot even imagine how you feel. I feel awful and they aren't my kids!

I'm glad they are going after these horrid people. Did they seriously think they were going to get away with this?

Are your kids in IC? That letter from your son to his sister speaks volumes about what his little heart is carrying.

Me: BS 44; Him: WH 47 M - 22 Years
D-day: 7/2013; D filed 7/2014; Divorced 7-27-16
...the WS affair starts off in a dreamland where everything is all Golly, Wow! and Meant To Be! and Soul Mates drop from the trees to frolic in the mist. -devotedman

posts: 5796   ·   registered: Aug. 13th, 2013
id 6878821
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 teeghan (original poster member #40859) posted at 4:36 PM on Sunday, July 20th, 2014

Yes they are in counseling and so am I. They had a counseling sesesion scheduled yesterday but the play therapist got into an accident and had to cancel. They are rescheduled for Wednesday. Thankfully she was ok - but had to go be checked out for her right foot.

I am almost certain that they have not told me everything. My son before was holding back a lot from me and telling his conselor. She did not tell me everything he said in case she needed to be called into court - but did tell me then that this monster should never be left alone with my kids - and at that time the stupid idiot got unsupervised visitation that was supervised. I was a bit in shock.... and all had been going ok the last 1.5 months until this visit. I just feel like such a fool.

I do know that my daughter did tell her dad that she hates him. It takes A LOT for that child to stand up to someone. She is always afraid she will hurt someones feelings. She didnt care this time though.... she really meant it when she said she hated him.

:( Thank you all for thoughts and prayers... please continue to keep us in your thoughts. We need it.

posts: 111   ·   registered: Oct. 2nd, 2013   ·   location: Georgia
id 6878890
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softballmom ( new member #44171) posted at 6:35 PM on Sunday, July 20th, 2014

Oh my gosh! I just read through your post. There are hardly words for such an awful thing. You and your kiddos are in my thoughts and prayers. I Am very glad your kids have such a great mom yo support and protect them! Best wishes are with you guys!!

posts: 12   ·   registered: Jul. 20th, 2014
id 6878966
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heme ( member #40684) posted at 8:13 PM on Sunday, July 20th, 2014

Oh poor babies and mommy.. You did everything you could, you didn't fail your children the system did.

((teeghan))

BS: Me (30)
WS: Husband (31)
Married 8 years, together 9
D-Day: Sept 10, 2013
D-Day2: May 31, 2014
Children: 5, ages 7, 5, 3, 1 and due in September

Leaning towards leaving, no one deserves this pain.

posts: 205   ·   registered: Sep. 16th, 2013
id 6879030
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Rubix ( member #44099) posted at 8:33 PM on Sunday, July 20th, 2014

What a horrific thing to happen. If I found out anything like that happened to my DD I would really struggle not to take things into my own hands, but you're doing the right thing. What an EVIL little ... Ahh there are no words for THAT. Thoughts with you and your kids Hun. Sending you lots of strength to! (((teeghan)))

BS:(28)WS:(32-RemorsefulHubby)
kids:mine:DD 8 ours:DS 2
Married: 24/04/2014. Seperated.
Dday: 13/6/14 CL ads, ONS,
10/2014 CL ads and possible EA

posts: 703   ·   registered: Jul. 12th, 2014   ·   location: UK
id 6879045
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determinata ( member #42124) posted at 2:47 AM on Monday, July 21st, 2014

Teeghan,

I am so, so sorry for the torture inflicted upon your babies. Please continue to be strong for your kids. You will get them *and yourself* through this. It's such an awful thing to happen but they will heal and you will help them. You are in my thoughts.

M 2007. DDay 2008
~10+ CL Prostitutes in 8 months
Divorcing SAWH "ActionsOverWords"
Me: Early 30s BW (also an adult OC) w Baby DS

6 years of TT, hidden STD & false R
Separated 5 mos+; he will not commit
Someday I will be okay

posts: 288   ·   registered: Jan. 19th, 2014   ·   location: New York City
id 6879285
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Skan ( member #35812) posted at 3:20 AM on Monday, July 21st, 2014

Just wanted to check in and tell you that you and your babies are in my prayers. (((hugs)))

Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.

D-Day, June 10, 2012


posts: 11513   ·   registered: Jun. 11th, 2012   ·   location: So California
id 6879313
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hopefulmother ( member #38790) posted at 3:34 AM on Monday, July 21st, 2014

So sorry. My prayers are going out for you and your two babies. I just hope that nothing more happened. I think all of us want to jump through our comps and perform some Boondock Saints Justice on these two pieces of shit.

Me-BW 44
WH-44 zugzwang
D-day 9-4-12
Major TT 8-14
Friends since 1993
Married 2004 with 2 children
My wedding band is a symbol of hope, forgiveness, love, and grace.

posts: 1991   ·   registered: Mar. 22nd, 2013   ·   location: PA
id 6879328
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PurpleRose ( member #33129) posted at 3:50 AM on Monday, July 21st, 2014

Wow, I'm so sad for you all! This is horrendous.

I am so impressed with your ability to get this taken care of quickly. You are a champion to your kids right now. Stay strong!

divorced the Dooosh 8/13
*****************************
Dance like nobody is watching,
Text and email like it will be used in court someday...

posts: 3871   ·   registered: Aug. 17th, 2011   ·   location: Happyville
id 6879339
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caregiver9000 ( member #28622) posted at 4:02 AM on Monday, July 21st, 2014

(((teeghan)))

You keep on doing the right thing. You are so strong and setting a great example for those kids about how to handle adversity.

Hug those babies.

Me: fortysomething, independent, happy,
XH "Stretch" (and Skew!) ;)
two kids, teens. Old enough I am truly NO CONTACT w/ NPD zebraduck
S 5/2010
D 12/2012

posts: 7063   ·   registered: May. 27th, 2010   ·   location: a better place
id 6879356
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