This Topic is Archived
lynnm1947 ( member #15300) posted at 3:21 PM on Tuesday, September 7th, 2010
Dear Lynnm1947,
Whatever possessed you to make 16 pints of chipotle salsa, 16 pints of regular chili sauce and 16 pints of extra spicy chili sauce? YOU ARE A FAMILY OF TWO!!!! We will be sitting on the shelves for 3 years unless you are invited to lots of dinner parties where you can bring us as hostess gifts. WERE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND? We are not sluts; we like to be used once in a while, not hourly.
Sincerely,
Long Weekend Preserves
Age: 64..ummmmmmm, no...............65....no...oh, hell born in 1947. You figure it out!
"I could have missed the pain, but I would have had to miss the dance." Garth Brooks
Rise_Above ( member #23674) posted at 3:02 AM on Saturday, September 11th, 2010
Dear HP2605dn printer,
You suck! You refuse to print when asked to. You don't wnat to be recognized by the computer and then go back to not printing what I asked you. I am tired of seeing the monkey butt! Now you've decided that you don't recognize that yes indeed there is actually a magenta cartridge in there and new one at that!
I will be tearing you apart in a couple of days, you will either work or your next port of call is going to be the island of useless things.
Your future destructor or liberator of color...it is your choice.
Ria
You can live the way you believe this is your opportunity to let your life be one that lights the way~F.Battistelli
*****
God's hand was an avocado branch
Threnody ( member #1558) posted at 8:11 PM on Monday, September 27th, 2010
Dear Body,
Your current lack of enthusiasm for this whole functioning thing is apparent. Please be in the meeting room at 2:30 to discuss other employment options.
--Brain,
Your Boss
[This message edited by Threnody at 2:11 PM, September 27th (Monday)]
“If you don't like my opinion of you, you can always improve.” ~ Ashleigh Brilliant
"Great love requires determination." ~ tryingtwo
"Don't try to win over the haters, you're not the jackass whisperer." ~ Brene Brown
Rise_Above ( member #23674) posted at 7:57 PM on Tuesday, October 19th, 2010
Dear Rain,
It is lovely to see you in the southland finally. I love listening to the pitter patter on the porch and see the drops glistening in the scattered sunshine.
If your friend the rainbow wants to come out and play too, that would be swell!!
Singin' in the Rain
Ria 
You can live the way you believe this is your opportunity to let your life be one that lights the way~F.Battistelli
*****
God's hand was an avocado branch
Heartless Bytchh ( member #12347) posted at 12:58 AM on Wednesday, October 20th, 2010
Dear Ria, that post was almost like reading poetry.
Nice!
Woodchipper pretty much trumps everything.-Rufus Turner
Sometimes I feel like SI is that person who says... "if you can't say anything nice... come sit by me!"-rumorhasit
TrulyReconciled ( member #3031) posted at 9:57 PM on Thursday, October 21st, 2010
Dear French citizens:
Get the Fuck over It - OK???
Merci 
"In a time of deceit, telling the Truth is a revolutionary act."
kdny ( member #760) posted at 10:31 PM on Thursday, October 21st, 2010
Dear TR,
Apparently I missed something. Or it was in French and I just didn't get it
Hazily,
Abbynormal
Whether we remain ash or become phoenix is up to us.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sometimes the fine line between a nervous breakdown and knowing things will be okay is a pair of furry pants~unfound
kdny ( member #760) posted at 10:33 PM on Thursday, October 21st, 2010
Dear Anti-Anxiety drug that starts with a K,
Yes, I know that people aren't supposed to take drugs not prescribed to them. What could half a pill hurt was my thought when my son said "here mom, you need this" at the office today.
Good thing I didn't take it before I came home.
Who the hell could drive on this? Who the hell can type on this?
Nighty night.
Love,
Who am I?
Whether we remain ash or become phoenix is up to us.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sometimes the fine line between a nervous breakdown and knowing things will be okay is a pair of furry pants~unfound
authenticnow ( member #16024) posted at 10:35 PM on Thursday, October 21st, 2010
Dear Whoever is in Charge of This Stuff,
Feeling like crap for Parents Weekend at DD's college? And my period?
Sooooo not funny 
Signed,
Moody and Sniffly
DS, you are forever in my heart. Thank you for sharing your beautiful spirit with me. I will always try to live by the example you have set. I love you and miss you every day and am sorry you had to go so soon, it just doesn't seem fair.
kdny ( member #760) posted at 10:38 PM on Thursday, October 21st, 2010
Dear Moody and Sniffly,
Would you like the other half of this pill? 
Love,
Happy to help
Whether we remain ash or become phoenix is up to us.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sometimes the fine line between a nervous breakdown and knowing things will be okay is a pair of furry pants~unfound
TrulyReconciled ( member #3031) posted at 10:40 PM on Thursday, October 21st, 2010
Dear kdny:
http://ireport.cnn.com/blogs/ireport-blog/2010/10/21/us-passionate-about-french-protests?hpt=T2
We're going to have to work until we're dead ...
"In a time of deceit, telling the Truth is a revolutionary act."
kdny ( member #760) posted at 10:44 PM on Thursday, October 21st, 2010
Dear TR,
Not if we move to France.
Merci,
kd
Whether we remain ash or become phoenix is up to us.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sometimes the fine line between a nervous breakdown and knowing things will be okay is a pair of furry pants~unfound
metamorphisis ( member #12041) posted at 10:52 PM on Thursday, October 21st, 2010
Dear Hazy,
I hope the name of that little happy pill wasn't ketamine 
Whip out the old Pink Floyd albums and have some cheesies and a nap. 
Love Meta
PS.. if you're not doing anything with that other half 
[This message edited by metamorphisis at 4:53 PM, October 21st (Thursday)]
Go softly my sweet friend. You will always be a part of who I am.
kdny ( member #760) posted at 10:53 PM on Thursday, October 21st, 2010
Dear Meta,
LOL, no, definitely not. But cheesies and a nap sound good.
Actually sitting under my desk with a whole chocolate cake sounds good and I don't like chocolate.
Love,
Hazy
Whether we remain ash or become phoenix is up to us.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sometimes the fine line between a nervous breakdown and knowing things will be okay is a pair of furry pants~unfound
Rise_Above ( member #23674) posted at 4:11 PM on Saturday, October 23rd, 2010
Dear furbabies,
Stretching is not an invitation to attack my toes, especially on a lazy Saturday morning.
Also, please teach me the art of levitation and vertical shift when scared, I think it could be most useful.
Gratefully
The one that feeds you.
You can live the way you believe this is your opportunity to let your life be one that lights the way~F.Battistelli
*****
God's hand was an avocado branch
karmasnmf ( member #12370) posted at 5:58 PM on Thursday, October 28th, 2010
Dear OL,
I'm sorry that you were lost. I'm glad that I found you and hope others will help to resurrect you.
Dear Life,
Thank you for not throwing me any curve balls this week.
Sincerely,
The person without a catcher's mitt.
Rise_Above ( member #23674) posted at 6:25 PM on Thursday, October 28th, 2010
Dear karmasnmf,
For you.
Many hugs
Ria
You can live the way you believe this is your opportunity to let your life be one that lights the way~F.Battistelli
*****
God's hand was an avocado branch
karmasnmf ( member #12370) posted at 7:10 PM on Thursday, October 28th, 2010
Dear RIA,
You are a life-saver!! Now I don't need a mitt!!
karmasnmf
karmasnmf ( member #12370) posted at 8:33 PM on Thursday, October 28th, 2010
Dear OL,
Please accept my apologizes for reviving you just to kill you. 
Your Friend,
karmasnmf
Rise_Above ( member #23674) posted at 8:40 PM on Thursday, October 28th, 2010
Dear karmasnmf,
Thank you for reviving OL and you are most welcome.
Ria
You can live the way you believe this is your opportunity to let your life be one that lights the way~F.Battistelli
*****
God's hand was an avocado branch
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