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Newest Member: hhsavannah

Just Found Out :
Honey, they always affair down

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scamper10 ( new member #30545) posted at 5:01 PM on Saturday, February 12th, 2011

bump

posts: 9   ·   registered: Dec. 28th, 2010   ·   location: pittsburgh,pa
id 5075259
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mefirst ( member #13135) posted at 5:59 PM on Saturday, February 12th, 2011

But of course their choices are skanks, inmates, unemployed and worthless.

The WS is always broken, so it makes sense. Their self-esteem and self-respect is nonexistant. They MUST be adored, in fantasy. The only minions prepared to take that role are society's castoffs.

Makes perfect sense.

Courage is not the absence of fear; it's acting in the face of fear.

posts: 905   ·   registered: Jan. 3rd, 2007   ·   location: Arizona
id 5075345
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MzMagoo ( member #30978) posted at 9:09 PM on Saturday, February 12th, 2011

ah, yes...

His current little "friend" that he has been texting and calling, is married, has 5 kids, and hasn't worked, like, ever.

His A...well, overweight and almost toothless, with large drug habit. Lovely.

BS (me) 37/WS (him)37
M 13 years/together 18
DD 1~ 8-10/ DD 2~ 11-10
3 kids~ S 14, D 10, D 10
Filed for D: 11-10
R: Trying to trust it is real
If you walk around the pool long enough, you are bound to fall in.

posts: 271   ·   registered: Jan. 26th, 2011   ·   location: At the moment? Hell.
id 5075547
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Tresemme ( member #31185) posted at 6:13 AM on Monday, February 14th, 2011

I loveeee this =)

(Me)Bw late 30s
On 5/1/10 I learned I hired a succubus as a live in nanny and that she was preg w an OC!
2019 Divorcing and in love with someone I pray is the monogamist I begged Jesus for

posts: 438   ·   registered: Feb. 14th, 2011   ·   location: Florida
id 5077585
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Crushed38 ( member #30644) posted at 2:43 PM on Monday, February 14th, 2011

God, I SO WANNA POST this in an OW forum, and they do have them out there because I just googled it!!

It's amazing that someone can break your heart and you still love them with all of the little pieces. -unknown

posts: 1540   ·   registered: Jan. 6th, 2011
id 5077925
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NOTINKANSAS ( member #31199) posted at 7:58 PM on Tuesday, February 15th, 2011

Thank you so much for this post. I have read it over and over.

I'm 33
He's 31
Recovering from SA
4 kids
D-Day 01-06-11 (Husband confessed sex 2x in 2009 with "trashy" girl from the ghetto)
D-Day 2 May 7, 2011 (confessed the rest of the betrayals)

posts: 234   ·   registered: Feb. 15th, 2011
id 5080853
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Canteatorsleep ( new member #31205) posted at 4:59 AM on Wednesday, February 16th, 2011

Thank you for this post

DD: 2/12/11
Me (BS): 31
Him (WS): 32
Together: 13 years
Married: 3 1/2 years

posts: 21   ·   registered: Feb. 16th, 2011   ·   location: Hell
id 5081708
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Cee64D ( member #21836) posted at 12:04 PM on Thursday, February 17th, 2011

The hardest part of forgiveness is accepting it from others...
Me BH 44
Clarrissa FWW 44
D-Day 04 Oct, 2008

posts: 2740   ·   registered: Nov. 30th, 2008   ·   location: Ohio
id 5084191
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Crushed38 ( member #30644) posted at 11:15 PM on Thursday, February 24th, 2011

Just wanted to give this thread a bump for anyone who might need to read it again, or for the first time.

It's amazing that someone can break your heart and you still love them with all of the little pieces. -unknown

posts: 1540   ·   registered: Jan. 6th, 2011
id 5097995
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Ms_Strong ( member #30883) posted at 12:34 AM on Friday, February 25th, 2011

And these women are totally okay with not being able to go out in public with their 'boyfriend', and know that every time he leaves her bedroom they are going home to sleep beside and wake up beside someone he is not ashamed of. What type of woman is happy to be that? The OW in my case is not unemployed, is smart, but I do wonder why she settled for that type of life instead of a proper boyfriend for 18m???

Me: 40, happily divorced Dec11
D-Day #1 - 9th Jan 11, D-Day #2 - 13th Jan 11
Kids - 4, 8 yrs

posts: 324   ·   registered: Jan. 18th, 2011
id 5098144
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Crushed38 ( member #30644) posted at 2:04 AM on Friday, February 25th, 2011

Because whatever her outward appearance is or whatever the public perception of her is, she's a morally weak person - the weakest of the pack - no character, no grit, an easy target. She's a piece of shit, with no self-esteem or self-worth.

[This message edited by Crushed38 at 8:29 PM, February 24th (Thursday)]

It's amazing that someone can break your heart and you still love them with all of the little pieces. -unknown

posts: 1540   ·   registered: Jan. 6th, 2011
id 5098284
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butterfly30 ( member #29356) posted at 3:52 AM on Friday, February 25th, 2011

WH had his head so far up his butt that his secret name for her was "Virtuous". Seriously. This insightful post helped me see that I am the only one in this nightmare that has earned that title.

posts: 65   ·   registered: Aug. 18th, 2010
id 5098477
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SongSungBlue ( new member #31265) posted at 4:05 AM on Friday, February 25th, 2011

Brilliant!!!! Thank you so much..... brilliant and so, so true....

M: 17 Years
Dday: 12/7/2010
Me: 40
H: 47
Daughter: 16
Son: 14
Reconciling

posts: 13   ·   registered: Feb. 21st, 2011
id 5098488
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s+++forbrains ( member #18128) posted at 3:07 PM on Wednesday, March 2nd, 2011

LOVE IT!! Thank you, I will be reminding myself every time I see the ap.

posts: 178   ·   registered: Feb. 9th, 2008
id 5108494
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soso1110 ( member #31376) posted at 3:13 PM on Wednesday, March 2nd, 2011

That just made me cry. It is so true. I often wonder what she had that I didn't. The girl my SO cheated with is very pretty and thin. BUT she knew he had a family and she knew he was not plannign on leaving but she still tried. she still begged, she still said she loved him etc...I could NEVER do that!!! now thanks to your post, I know what she doesnt have....self respect!!

posts: 302   ·   registered: Mar. 2nd, 2011
id 5108514
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Cee64D ( member #21836) posted at 12:32 PM on Thursday, March 3rd, 2011

The hardest part of forgiveness is accepting it from others...
Me BH 44
Clarrissa FWW 44
D-Day 04 Oct, 2008

posts: 2740   ·   registered: Nov. 30th, 2008   ·   location: Ohio
id 5110608
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journey2peace ( member #31157) posted at 3:16 PM on Thursday, March 3rd, 2011

I have spent the past month feeling horrible because WHs SOW was tall, thin, very attractive.

WH told me that she was married for a long time and was divorced about a year and a half ago and that even though he wore condoms (except during the oral sex ) she was such a nice girl and wouldn't have been a big STD risk.

In reality, it turns out she has been divorced multiple times, lived with other men between the marriages/divorces, but somehow ended up loving WH "more than she has ever loved anyone in her entire life." This after two months. No real dates (out to dinner once, they each paid for their own meal), only a handfull of booty calls. She can really pick the winners

It took me about a month to finally understand this concept. But, it's true...they always affair down.

Falling down is part of life. Getting back up is living.

posts: 192   ·   registered: Feb. 11th, 2011
id 5110907
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Crushed38 ( member #30644) posted at 4:15 PM on Friday, March 4th, 2011

Bumping this up again.

It's amazing that someone can break your heart and you still love them with all of the little pieces. -unknown

posts: 1540   ·   registered: Jan. 6th, 2011
id 5113282
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ReallyWeary ( member #31406) posted at 4:34 PM on Friday, March 4th, 2011

Needed someone to look up to him. I was always pressing for more. I work hard, expected him to work hard. I bring home a good salary. I expected him to bring home a good salary. I have a standard of living that I want to maintain. Expected him to do his part. His OWs were economically-challenged, poorly educated, and he could play Big Dog. They wouldn't push for more or be upset when he changed jobs again, or was unemployed for 6 months at a time. He came home and told me that he was a "catch", a red-flag that I missed.

BW (Me) 52
F? WH 53

DD#1 - EA Only (?) 12/25/07 25 YO Assistant
DD#2 - EA Only (?) 6/10/10 48 YO Assistant
M 14 Years, no Children together, 3 adult children

posts: 63   ·   registered: Mar. 4th, 2011   ·   location: South
id 5113321
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betrayedONE ( member #29650) posted at 4:48 PM on Friday, March 4th, 2011

Good stuff. Although hard to read considering FWW was the OW. Sad but true. My wife was more atractive and that boosted her esteem at the time. You nailed it though. That was pure luck.

OW sold her soul for the morsels

Isn’t it ironic that cheaters often call each other Soul mates (I found emails) when they are selling their souls.

[This message edited by betrayedONE at 11:27 AM, March 4th (Friday)]

Dday: 11/16/07
R with remorseful W
Me : 42 BH
MM: 41 Piece of shit married Cop
Her: 39 FWW
Together 21 years, married 18
Children: Boy 7 Girl 10

posts: 91   ·   registered: Sep. 19th, 2010   ·   location: Texas
id 5113345
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