SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

I myself was a late bloomer. I waited what seemed like forever to sprout pubic hair. When I did I was so darn proud of that stuff! There is no way I'm shaving it off now. I do keep it trimmed and partly shaved down below if you know what I mean. I have shaved it in the past and found it extremely uncomfortable. It was also a pain to keep maintained. Soon I realized I had no interest in that and went back to be more natural. These days I probably have let things go a bit wild. I could probably give the yeti a run for it's money!

I will echo what most others have said here which is do what you feel comfortable with. If you aren't comfortable with it or it triggers you then by all means keep your pubes the way you want them!

I think if your WH wants you to look like the prostitutes he had his A with, that's horrible and you should in no way let him manipulate you into emulating his hookers.

Absolutely agree with this!

and this

As far as the state of things down below, all I can say is that I only tried going completely bare there once and it was hugely uncomfortable-I'm already so sensitive there that taking the small buffer zone away was painful in a bad way. And even with trimmed hair I've always had really good hygiene so there's no cleanliness issue to solve by shaving.

I did it once and found it made being intimate painful because I am already so sensitive. Of course, as my friend put it, all it takes is a strong wind blow for me to feel it.

Shortly after DDay, I actually brought out the electric shaver and told WH to have at it. I have been waxed, shaved, as well as long and lush. Just a different "feel". I have no preference. I was very vulnerable and wanted him to see and feel my vulnerability.

It was weird to have him trim the way he wanted. After he finished, I asked if he made me look like OW - he kinda looked away and said "no". He said I now look like me.

I'm getting a little bushy right now and will probably break out the shaver again this week end. maybe we'll go with a landing strip.

I like to be pretty much hairless. I have a small landing strip. My H likes it, but I do it to feel clean and smooth.

In Florida, we are in bathing suits a lot too-easier this way.

Triggers here too but the other way. I like a topiary lady garden and always have done.

When I asked FWH about her general hygiene he said she never trimmed her nether regions and was proud of the fact she could go days without showering.

What smacked him upside the head was more that she'd not washed it and that had completely washed over his head during their A --- but it has left me with a bit more of a topiary trimming fetish.

The stuff I admit to on here!! Maybe it's good I don't know any of you IRL

This subject is a huge trigger for me.

During my ws A, he basically ceased intimacy with me due to a boatload of excuses, stress, job etc. We had not had sex in months nor had I seen him without clothes on, he started dressing in the bathroom..Yeh I know..big flag. Anyhoo, we had sex unexpectedly and to my surprise, he was as bald as a baby's butt. When I asked wtf?? He said oh I thought you would like it. Long story short, he didn't do it for me, I was not even supposed to.be home. I came home early from out of town trip and after a big fight we had some crazy sexcapade. He started requesting I do it, which I've always kept things pretty uhmm trimmed but he wanted the Telly Savales, if you KWIM. Fast forward a couple of years and my discovery of his porn addiction, now I

get it. He and ow are both heavily into

porn, its a rarity for the porn stars to have any pubes. So it all makes perfect sense now and its not a fun subject in my house.

@mrsdoubtfire...Ewwww days without bathing..she sounds like a gross pig.

On the topic of shaving, as I'm younger and a west coast guy, I'm used to both partners shaving down there (yes I do too).

If you mean COMPLETELY shaved, then that is less common but still fairly normal. It's not as difficult as you think as there are powders out there you mix into a paste, rub on, then scrape off and it's done. Magic Shaving Powder, for example, is designed for black men with facial irritation to shaving and is widely used by women to get a full Brazilian effect with no bumps, no razor burn, no pain.

Some hair down stairs is the majority. Like a landing strip or patch, but neatly trimmed otherwise.

Now on the affair thing, because your husband cheated doesn't mean he now gets rewarded with Porn Wife V2.0. Any kind of blame shifting is a bald faced lie. You're getting yourself into a very hairy situation if you let a WS try to finagle you into action through blame or guilt shifting from their affair(s).

Under NO circumstances should you even consider changing yourself to somehow compete with the affair... period. Maybe YEARS of hard work on the part of the WS should such fancies be pursued, but for now, I can't fathom a bigger jack-ass thing than trying to pit you against his whores by talking about pubic hair shaving.

If he does press this, then you tell him you want his back waxed... and you must perform the waxing for several months first before you'll even consider it. And be sure to RIP those strips off with no mercy.

[This message edited by MediumRare at 2:12 PM, May 1st (Wednesday)]

Any kind of blame shifting is a bald faced lie. You're getting yourself into a very hairy situation

Hate to split hairs here but the above statement gets to the root of the problem. Don't let your WH derail you with his clip request, s(h)ave yourself from his questionable desires; tell him to buzz off!

~Larry

that is too punny, larry

lol,lcl!

Since there is a minor derail, can I just add, vulva people. Vulva! If you are shaving up in your vagina...that ain't right. lol

Thank God this is an anonymous forum! Ya all remember when Brittney Spears went nuts & shaved her head? Well one of my reactions to Dday was to shave my kitty bald for the first time in my life, I was nearly 50 years old @ that point. Why I did it, how the hell do I know, was a crazy just found out moment. Turns out, I actually liked it & it was a total surprise for WH during HB. I really struggled with that aspect, was I rewarding his wayward behavior by being clean-shaven? My WH's cheating was BJ's from hookers so I don't think he saw any strange lady parts, hairy or not, so I decided I am OK with a new look down there. For me, I like the increased sensitivity so I have continued to mow my lawn:) Sorry for any guys who wander into this thread, TMI! Jamie

I just have to weigh in on this one. WH shared with me that the OW was completely shaved down there. And she had stubble that he found irritating.

I don't shave entirely, I just leave a landing strip. I personally think it looks nicer. As far as the hygiene end of it goes, the consensus among the doctors I've spoken to is that it is better to leave some hair, as the hair actually helps prevent bacteria.

personally I shave mine to a point for WH because I want to feel sexy for him .. I do anything In our relationship to keep him into me .. im almost 32 years old ... I hate when I feel unattractive on any part of me jmo

I've shaved mine for years. Not a total shave, I leave a triangle at the top. At first it was for a bf when I was 18 then became personal preference. Though I did feel some pressure to be done up freshly for XWBF all the time. I like guys at least trimmed up too. Going down on a man with a full bush is awkward.

Of course two weeks ago XWBF posted on facebook "Love is a Brazilian wax..." (I stopped looking at his page after that. Because ew.) How nice that Mrs. Robinson has the time and money to get that done. FTG!!!

Confused615, I agree!!

If you kept it short trimmed and after your H has an A, then tells you he likes shaved pussy.. It would be a huge trigger that would hAve me shaking. It IS your body. I can understand your trigger but not everyone that shaves it 100% off is a whore, there are plenty of woman that have hair on their vaginas and are even bigger whores.

I would have a problem with this and it would be a major trigger especially since its not something that you are used to or like. For me personally, sex feels way more better all shaved.

Jmho

@ LCL

Personally I prefer it either waxed or well groomed. But it's not a deal breaker if not maintained as overall I love her body regardless.

I triggered as well as she told me recently she thought the fact she was grooming to the shorter side might tip me off. how could I see that sign when she pretty much closed the door in that area and used other excuses about our relationship as the reason! It still bothered me that she took more care in that area without her AP asking than when I'd asked about it prior to her A!

It's really disturbing that this soon out he is making these kinds of demands. Also, I don't think it's right to make extreme demands (and shaving it all off is extreme) of your partner. It's reasonable to ask for hygiene and keeping things neat and trim, but keeping up a full shave takes time, effort, and can be uncomfortable.