SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

"We all have needs."

From WH to random FB "friend" he had no business being friends with.

Meanwhile, he ignored my needs for years.

I just learned this in a MC session when I asked WH what his skank ever said about me....said to my WH while they were on a date:

"you know, your wife is very lucky to have you as a husband."

Yeah, I'm very "lucky" to have wedded a cheater! Yeah, more like "unlucky"

OW used to have a pinterest board all full of lovely catchphrases about never regretting, and doing what makes you happy, living with passion, focusing on your needs, not judging others unless you yourself are perfect etc. So self centered and with no remorse what so ever.

Sounds exactly like our OW's facebook page.

Life isn’t about worrying.

And finding people who accept that person.

“A conscience is what hurt when all your other parts feel so good.” - Couldn't believe she actually posted this one.

“To be your friend was all I ever wanted, to be your love… is all I ever dreamed.”

“Life is short, break rules, forgive quickly, kiss slowly, love truly, laugh uncontrollably, and never regret anything that made you smile.”** The asterisks she always put on posts related to my WH.

“A soulmate is someone who has the locks that fit our keys, and keys to fit our locks… with that one person we’re safe in our own paradise. Our soulmate is someone who shares our deepest longings, our sense of direction. When we’re two balloons, and together our direction is up, chances are we’ve found the right person. Our soulmate is the one who makes our life come to life.” Richard Bach*

“Risk more than others think is safe. Care more than others think is wise.* Dream more than others think is practical. Expect more than others think is possible.”

“A special friend changes your life by being a part of it, makes you laugh until you can’t stop, convinces you an unlocked door is waiting for you to open. Your forever friend gets you through hard times, sad times, and confused times. If you walk away, they will follow you, guide you, cheer you on, hold your hand and say everything is okay. You feel happy and complete. You have a forever friend, and forever had no end.***

“It is wrong to think that love comes from long companionship and persevering courtship. Love is the offspring of spiritual affinity and unless that affinity is created in a moment, it will not be created for years or even generations.”

Your forever friend is one who messages you and says, “I’m thinking about you,” calls you and says, “let’s get together,” hugs you and says, “It’s all okay,” says NOTHING and you know they are always there even though you haven’t spoken to or seen them in days – you know they were there and always have been. You never miss a beat and you never lose a forever friend.*

“With courage in your heart and with God by your side take a stand. Begin to design the life you want to live as best you can. In some of my darkest, most painful and frightening hours, I have prayed, not for the answers to my prayers but for my God to help me find strength, confidence, and courage to persevere and do what I must do.”

And this one, just as he was set to leave me:

“It doesn’t interest me if the story you are telling me is true. I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself, if you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul. If you can be alone with yourself and truly like the company you keep in the empty moments.”

Thanks for this thread. I had no idea they all did this!

And of course she told him that he wouldn't be cheating if he been "happy" with me.

[This message edited by sudra at 8:09 AM, September 15th (Sunday)]

I don't have anything new to add, except...

Why do they all say the same stuff, even OM?

I don't personally know the OW in my case but I do know that she said:

"I don't want to be a home wrecker."

"I don't want to hear anything about your wife or home life."

"You are lesser because you are married and live in the suburbs." (to my husband...she would say this. He said she looked down on him for this...LOL what idiots)

"We should probably take a break." (when I finally figured out what was going on...NO I'm sorry...the jig is up! You should END IT!!!!)

"I can't believe I wasted 2.5 years on you." (when SAWH finally broke it off)

"He told me you were having marriage problems"

"you've been married for so long, it's okay you don't need a condom"

I shook my head the whole time reading this. I mean what the f@#& do they all get together have coffee and think this shit up. Is there a book they all read?

My OW said " My H cheats on me and hits me. Im looking for a real man for my kids and I".

The ow like to say that to wh "you my pussy is better than your wifes" and it funny cause he couldn't stay hard for her....guess it really want better. And likes to post about me on fb about how i must think I'm something special....how the universes does not revolve around me.....how i should let her keep him since she stole him.....Bitch please....if he was stolen than how come he is still here with me 9 months after d day?

Oh and how can I forget the one that makes me wish firing squads were still in vogue and I led one:

"Kids are so resilient."

(On why WH should be destroying his home life to be f*cking her and eventually abandon his children.)

WH told me this line with tears in his eyes.

OW used to call me paranoid. Grrrrr.

OW's answer when I sent FB message confronting her, "It's like if you don't take care of your cat, he'll go to the neighbor's house to get better food & care, I was just making him happy". She then promptly msg'd him, "herongirl is angry at me"...You think?? His response to her? "Fuck off". She also posted lots of religious statuses (she's muslim). Maybe she was hoping to be his second wife....(not legal but tolerated in their country, although WS isn't even muslim)

Git 'er done.

After coming in to my 17 year marriage, the OW had the nerve to say to me:

"I just want my life back."

Oh, I'm sorry you will never get those 3 months back.

What about my 17 years?

CRAZY ASS B!TCH!!

facepunched - they say that because of their egos. They are so selfish...they think everyone around them has them on a pedestal...they are soooo special you know. They have to believe this, well, you know...because they are cheaters and liars and taking part in evil deeds. They all have screws loose.

Oooh . . . I'll play. OW posted on her Facebook -

Be the kind of person you'd be proud to have your children emulate.

Seriously can't make that up!

when he ended the talkfest of looooove - Well, its her fault, she ignored you!

no matter than I , myself was ignored lol and was his fault as well...nope, was aaaaaaaaaall me....

My H's OW used to say that it's ok because everyone does it.

The other line was, " what's wrong with you? Don't you just want to have a little fun, like a fun blow job?" ( that's how you talk to your CEO?)

And after H's gas lighting , she said dont worry about Crestfallen, she has no idea and you're paranoid! Ps....I was sooo not paranoid, I was on it!

I didn't add xOw1, my friend, and I really should've. Hers are classic OW attitudes:

"I want the fairy tale. The happily ever after."

She didn't believe me when I told her M was work with peaks and valleys.

"I want what you have."

I didn't take her literally, I should've. I just tried to get her to understand that my tall, dark, handsome husband wasn't always the prince she thought she was.

My life would've been easier if I had let myself see the truth of him (and her) clearer too.

[This message edited by Holly-Isis at 10:31 AM, September 16th (Monday)]

From their google chats:

"Just so you know, you aren't the only one effing up your home life. I started dating a guy a month ago."

Hmm, 1 month verses 9 years and two kids.....

Not necessarility an OW quote. But the next time she or WH says "I don't know why I/we did it" I'm gonna haul off an slap 'em. Then I'll say "I don't know why I did that."