SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

Most Stressed women don't feel sexy. Also, women under stress have less of the sexy hormones circulating in their blood. Stress isn't doing her any good, it's probably making her feel tired and is causing inflammation and lower immunity.

I know how stress feels. It's no fun but people tell themselves they just have to live with it as a fact of life and soldier on. What if you got really good at massage? That could bring her closer. My WS would ignore me while getting sucked into his computer for hours and that added to my stress...not saying you do anything....just that stress can be from all kinds of things.

Fender,

You wrote, Sometimes I wonder if I am just expecting too much, but then I read stories of other couple who are very affectionate, and the woman actually enjoys sex and intimacy,

A large and perhaps also unanswered question here is was she affectionate and intimate with the OM. There's no sense in staying in a marriage were you remain a 2nd class citizen to the OM.

I think the only way to get this answered is to have your WW write out a detailed timeline and then take a polygraph.

To my way of thinking kissing is more intimate than intercourse and unwilling kissing is the greatest form of rejection.

It's great that your talk really cemented your mutual desire to be together. I think that choice when it's sincere and backed with actions and affirmed is the biggest trust builder. When you doubt your relationship you doubt your WS.

I do remember your last thread from the summer and there was a lot of discussion of intimacy. Have you or she worked on that in therapy or together? When there's a lack of intimacy or your mutually distant in that department I imagine it can create doubt.

Hard stuff all around and glad to see you connected on what you want and she had so much empathy and love as a response.