Newest Member: faithfulMan911

Just Found Out :
Before You Say Reconcile...

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Lost and Betraye ( Member #33988) posted at 6:21 PM on Thursday, December 8th, 2011

bump

Me=BS 50; Him=WS 46; Dday 11/10/11
Married 13 years; together 20
Kids: DD11;(2) grown boys/men from my previous marriage to a WS
Status: Divorcing

"The past is a guidepost, not a hitching post" L Thomas Holdcroft

posts: 317   ·   registered: Nov. 22nd, 2011   ·   location: CA
id 5574142
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emptyheart ( Member #18873) posted at 4:26 PM on Sunday, December 11th, 2011

bump for newbies

Me - BW, Him - WH
2 great kids that are my reason for living.
1st D-Day - March 28, 2008
False R for a year
2nd D-Day - April 11, 2009

posts: 1143   ·   registered: Mar. 28th, 2008
id 5578697
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annb ( Member #22386) posted at 6:40 PM on Monday, December 12th, 2011

bump

posts: 11257   ·   registered: Jan. 10th, 2009   ·   location: Northeast
id 5580485
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bufffalo ( Member #21854) posted at 6:12 AM on Friday, December 16th, 2011

DDay 9/25/2008

BH-me

posts: 6172   ·   registered: Dec. 1st, 2008   ·   location: Texas
id 5587555
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unarmbears ( Member #7480) posted at 4:06 AM on Sunday, December 18th, 2011

FBS-Me, 67
FWH-Him, 62
2 Sons 33 and 38
2 Daughters 36 & 31 And 5 darling grandchildren!
"Love is an impulsive act, it's free. It's the story we tell about it afterward that's our poverty." Byron Katie

posts: 4904   ·   registered: Jun. 27th, 2005   ·   location: From where the trees lean east...
id 5590977
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Lost and Betraye ( Member #33988) posted at 4:41 AM on Tuesday, December 20th, 2011

bump

Me=BS 50; Him=WS 46; Dday 11/10/11
Married 13 years; together 20
Kids: DD11;(2) grown boys/men from my previous marriage to a WS
Status: Divorcing

"The past is a guidepost, not a hitching post" L Thomas Holdcroft

posts: 317   ·   registered: Nov. 22nd, 2011   ·   location: CA
id 5594088
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annb ( Member #22386) posted at 1:45 AM on Friday, December 23rd, 2011

bump

posts: 11257   ·   registered: Jan. 10th, 2009   ·   location: Northeast
id 5599047
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unarmbears ( Member #7480) posted at 1:06 AM on Sunday, January 1st, 2012

Bump

Happy New Year!

FBS-Me, 67
FWH-Him, 62
2 Sons 33 and 38
2 Daughters 36 & 31 And 5 darling grandchildren!
"Love is an impulsive act, it's free. It's the story we tell about it afterward that's our poverty." Byron Katie

posts: 4904   ·   registered: Jun. 27th, 2005   ·   location: From where the trees lean east...
id 5612283
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 Fighting2Survive (original poster Member #28410) posted at 5:13 AM on Wednesday, January 4th, 2012

Me: BW, 40.......Him: FWH, 40
D-day: 3-22-10
DS1: 11, DS2: crawling
Status: R going well

"When you can tell the story and it doesn't bring up any pain, you know it is healed." - Iyanla Vanzant, Broken Pieces

posts: 7279   ·   registered: Apr. 30th, 2010   ·   location: NC
id 5617617
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lordhasaplan? ( Member #30079) posted at 3:22 AM on Friday, January 6th, 2012

BS- Me (45)
D-day: 5/18/10, lies and TT till (11/26/10).
Currently in R.
Don't carry others crap. It's your job to fix yourself, not your spouse.

posts: 2104   ·   registered: Nov. 10th, 2010
id 5621688
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 Fighting2Survive (original poster Member #28410) posted at 12:04 AM on Tuesday, January 10th, 2012

Me: BW, 40.......Him: FWH, 40
D-day: 3-22-10
DS1: 11, DS2: crawling
Status: R going well

"When you can tell the story and it doesn't bring up any pain, you know it is healed." - Iyanla Vanzant, Broken Pieces

posts: 7279   ·   registered: Apr. 30th, 2010   ·   location: NC
id 5628347
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bufffalo ( Member #21854) posted at 6:26 AM on Sunday, January 15th, 2012

bump...

DDay 9/25/2008

BH-me

posts: 6172   ·   registered: Dec. 1st, 2008   ·   location: Texas
id 5638183
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 Fighting2Survive (original poster Member #28410) posted at 7:10 PM on Wednesday, January 18th, 2012

Me: BW, 40.......Him: FWH, 40
D-day: 3-22-10
DS1: 11, DS2: crawling
Status: R going well

"When you can tell the story and it doesn't bring up any pain, you know it is healed." - Iyanla Vanzant, Broken Pieces

posts: 7279   ·   registered: Apr. 30th, 2010   ·   location: NC
id 5644310
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annb ( Member #22386) posted at 11:36 PM on Friday, January 20th, 2012

bump

posts: 11257   ·   registered: Jan. 10th, 2009   ·   location: Northeast
id 5648418
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bunni972 ( Member #33690) posted at 12:46 AM on Saturday, January 21st, 2012

Sometimes I wonder if we are truly in R or just rugsweeping but after reading this I know that we are truly in R and it is a wonderful feeling knowing that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I know that this journey is not going to be smooth sailing all the way but I have faith that we are supposed to be here and that we will come out on the other side happier and more in love than we were before the A.

ME: BS 40
HIM: FWH 41
2 boys: 20, 17
DDay #1: October 17th 2011 (A w/ co-worker & visit with 2 "working girls"
DDay #2: September 20th 2013(A w/ girl from Craigslist. Had sex multiple times with 2 women he found on Ashley Madison.
Not s

posts: 100   ·   registered: Oct. 21st, 2011   ·   location: Marion, IL
id 5648518
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AttemptStrength ( Member #27947) posted at 6:05 AM on Monday, January 23rd, 2012

bump

BS me
WS him x2 A's
1 autistic DS

I'd never have spent the money on a wedding dress if I knew I was just going to a costume party.

posts: 1992   ·   registered: Mar. 16th, 2010   ·   location: Wisconsin
id 5651824
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lordhasaplan? ( Member #30079) posted at 4:31 PM on Tuesday, January 24th, 2012

bump

BS- Me (45)
D-day: 5/18/10, lies and TT till (11/26/10).
Currently in R.
Don't carry others crap. It's your job to fix yourself, not your spouse.

posts: 2104   ·   registered: Nov. 10th, 2010
id 5654432
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annb ( Member #22386) posted at 11:03 PM on Thursday, January 26th, 2012

bump

posts: 11257   ·   registered: Jan. 10th, 2009   ·   location: Northeast
id 5659179
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annb ( Member #22386) posted at 8:37 PM on Thursday, February 2nd, 2012

posts: 11257   ·   registered: Jan. 10th, 2009   ·   location: Northeast
id 5670669
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rainbow123 ( Member #12329) posted at 11:01 PM on Thursday, February 2nd, 2012

My WH rugswept till the rug was threadbare. Then he left. No remorse, no discussions, only an expectation that I should feel sorry for him in having to choose between us. I feel sick when I look back on it, how it was all about his grief.

Then his affair fizzled out and we started to discuss reconcilation (more rugsweeping). Then he went away on a business trip and fell in love with someone else. More lies.

He never came back after that. Now that has ended and he is around again, smiling that winsome smile. Please God give me the strength to punch his lights out if he ever suggests he wants to try again.

BS,50, WH 49. Dday number one 01 July 06, followed by dozens more. No remorse. Divorced 08.

Badly scarred but doing OK. Possibly better than he is.

"It will be alright in the end. And if it's not alright, it's not the end."

posts: 483   ·   registered: Oct. 13th, 2006   ·   location: UK
id 5670867
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