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The Book Club :
Healing the Shame That Binds You

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 LosferWords (original poster member #30369) posted at 8:29 PM on Sunday, January 29th, 2012

Just started this book by John Bradshaw. So far it is pretty intense. My therapist basically assigned this book to me. We're presently working through some of my problems with addiction, possible co-dependency and FOO issues.

Anyone else read this book? Was it helpful?

Thanks,

Losfer

posts: 31109   ·   registered: Dec. 11th, 2010
id 5663718
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beautifulmess ( member #32130) posted at 12:32 AM on Thursday, February 23rd, 2012

Read this one with my BH. It took a LONG time. Lots of in-depth reading in the beginning. But it provided some amazing insight to both of our lives. The exercises at the end are wonderful, although I don't practice them as much as I should.

This book spoke to me so loudly when searching for my whys.

We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures.

posts: 93   ·   registered: May. 11th, 2011   ·   location: CA
id 5707157
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jjct ( member #17484) posted at 12:58 AM on Thursday, February 23rd, 2012

Seminal work to my understanding of the development of PD's and what I was dealing with. Game-changer.

My brief and unenlightened take:

Most "normals" see that they did 'a bad thing', PD's believe they are the bad thing (that they did). Crucial difference.

I did not read the rest of the book. It's free online iirc, that's all I needed.

Literally launched me toward healing...

posts: 7269   ·   registered: Dec. 24th, 2007   ·   location: texas
id 5707222
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enduring ( member #9337) posted at 4:19 AM on Thursday, February 23rd, 2012

I read it. I found it thought provoking. I found it helpful for both sides of infidelity.

Another book that was very good and discussed many of the same shame issues was one by Patrick Carnes that was called The Betrayal Bond. It identified so many behaviors that i just used to think, 'gosh that is so bizarre'. It dealt alot with early sexual and emotional abuse and the loyalty and defense of the people responsible for the exploitation. Real eye opener.

Me: BS 57
Him: WH 57
married 38 years
3 DD 10 grandchildren
Reconciling

posts: 792   ·   registered: Jan. 9th, 2006   ·   location: PA
id 5707602
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 LosferWords (original poster member #30369) posted at 6:05 AM on Thursday, February 23rd, 2012

Interesting you should mention the Carnes book, enduring. That is the book my FWW is currently reading. Makes for some compelling discussion material. Like you said, very thought provoking.

I agree with what you said, beautifulmess, that it is a long read. Small doses of it contain a lot of info that take awhile to consume and digest.

Glad it was able to help you with your healing, jjct. I appreciate the feedback.

[This message edited by LosferWords at 12:29 AM, February 23rd (Thursday)]

posts: 31109   ·   registered: Dec. 11th, 2010
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