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Found a receipt for $70 for delvery of a dozen roses for OW's birthday, with note: "Happy, happy birthday to the most beautiful girl in the world. Signed a "Friend" Did I mention that my darling hubby hasn't worked or paid a bill for going on 10 months? Or that he had just asked to borrow $300 to cover his phone bill (that he was using to text her!) and car insurance bills? Did I mention that we were just married in June?

I called OW (it was about 5am), told her I was looking at the receipt for the flowers and wondered if she enjoyed them, since H had probably gotten the money to buy them from me. Asked if she knew he was married, and she said no. After finally admitting it, he says that they only effed twice about a month before our wedding - and then he told her he was getting married. She asid they couldn't have a physical relationship but they could talk and be "friends." like that makes it so much better! She's supposedly going thru a divorce, and he said she was aways so "encouraging" him in his job searching. I'd be "encouraging" too if he hadn't been sitting on the couch consuming $300-400 of food every month, and running up the BGE bill. Couple days after discovering my H's dirty deeds, I sent Mz. Thang a note advising her that while I 'm sure he mentioned it, H does have herpes. Although - at my insistence - H called her the morning of the "discovery" and said he wasn't going to see or talk to her again, and that she couldn't contact him, I'm sure he has been. I figure my note gives them a whole lot of new stuff to talk about. And if he keeps on irritating me, I'm going send a note to her hubby. If they are together, and H was lying about her being separated, I'm sure her hubby will appreciate the info. And if not, he can use it to negotiate the final divorce decree. Hell hath no fury like a betrayed newlywed!

Well as crazy as I thought it was, telling the other spouse really does cause a change. My wife admitted that she would have done the same thing after her initial irrational anger. Also, she has shown a change toward R. As of now looks like it really was a fantasy buster as this other guy is now in turmoil and not contacting her.

My only recommendation I would make is when you inform the other spouse and Sh#$ hits the fan own up to it that you were the informant. I partially did it anonymously and looking back regret that.