SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

I like symbols that represent something; that have special meaning.

You know what would really bless me? If FWH got a tattoo. Say an infinity symbol or anything that he wanted that would be a permanent symbol and a reminder of his re-commitment to our marriage. It would be a picture that I would see and be reminded/comforted without words. He does not have any tattoos, so permanently inking his re-commitment into his flesh would be a really great way to show his remorse.

And if he gave me a ring with the same symbol...ahhhh yessss that would melt my heart.

Thought I would throw that out there for anyone who is looking for an anniversary gift or some way to show real commitment.

Believe it or not, we did this, just short of a year after FWH's LTA on our 20th anniversary. He loves tattoos and already had 2. I'm not much of a fan of them for women. But then I tried to think of something to give him to mark such a special anniversary and came up blank until I thought of tattoos. He designed his, interlocking wedding rings with our names, our wedding date and "Prov 5:18", ("May your fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth"). It's on his left pec (his idea). Mine is a flower and vine (think henna) designed by our daughter- it's on my foot.

Your post is the first of thought of them since his latest escapade. I suppose it ought to make me sad. I know he was remorseful at the time, and he's remorseful now. No guarantees for the future for any of us, but it is a reminder of what we have to hold on to. I still think it's a great idea.

I like it. Don't know if H would think of that. I already have one. His name with some vines and flowers, I gave it to him 13 yrs ago as an anniversary present.

Our original wedding rings had the infinity symbol on them. I don't think I'll give that symbol another shot any time soon.

[This message edited by wincing_at_light at 7:33 PM, September 24th (Monday)]

I'm not asking for this. It would be awesome if he came up with it on his own...

Must learn to let this man write his own life story. If I asked I would always feel like he did it because I asked not because he wanted to do it. This is where I am in R.

My husband has been pushing for us to get matching tattoos since we started R'ing. I think it's a beautiful idea. Maybe some cleverly applied clues would help nudge him in the right direction?

Well, I have a tatu that means a great deal to me. Got it when I knew, but didn't know, that we had something very wrong going on in our lives. Loved it then and love it now. It speaks to me, my strength, and my courage. Has nothing to do with WH. WH isn't a fan of tatu, but he likes mine and frankly, gets that it's MINE. He has no intention of inking himself and I'm good with that. I got it for me and for my journey.

I'm thinking about getting one too.

Maybe of an ant lifting a house LOL

But seriously, I'm thinking of getting 888- 3 infinity symbols Forever Faithful-Trustworthy-Forgiving. This would be about Jesus and remind me that He never fails me.

Maybe some cleverly applied clues would help nudge him in the right direction?

Request white ink.

My husband got my name tattooed on his chest as a wedding present to me.

Two years later another woman woman was looking at it during sex.

I say, as long as it means something to both of you - like, REALLY means something - go for it. Ask for it.

I know a woman who has her husband's name tattooed on her ring finger. She's a nurse and doesn't wear her rings to work. I love this idea.

It's a great idea, but then so is taking vows and getting married... Only difference is a marriage can be dissolved with some paperwork, a tattoo is a little more difficult..

If they can break their vows, I'm not sure I want a permanent mark of them left on my body if R doesn't work out..

Jokingly I told my WH he needs to get put on his butt in BIG letters" Irishar's till the end" He is very remorseful and thought that was funny...he said you know that is true and I replied keep working hard and it could be,if not at least I will feel better because it would hurt like he** We both laughed. Its nice when we have a happy moment as they are so rare amongst all the tears

We both got a phoenix (rising from the ashes) - although I think we did it prematurely, like in the HB phase. But alas, there they are.

It's a great idea, but then so is taking vows and getting married... Only difference is a marriage can be dissolved with some paperwork, a tattoo is a little more difficult..

If they can break their vows, I'm not sure I want a permanent mark of them left on my body if R doesn't work out..

That's why it would be a great gesture if the Wayward did this. Words are one thing but branding your own flesh is another. Vows are serious commitments, but when they have been broken this would be a good way to show that they are recommitted...a step beyond mere words.

Words are one thing but branding your own flesh is another.

I don't put much stock in symbols anymore. My wife's AP had his BW's name tattooed in the small of his back (so much for branding). My wife had the symbols of my commitment (her wedding rings) on every time she was with her AP. So my faith in symbols is forever gone.

That being said, if it is something he can do for that helps you heal and he does it of his own free will, then that would be a great gesture. You mention that this is something he has to come up with on his own - have you talked to him about it at all?

What about an arrow on their stomach pointing down and the words FLESH EATING VIRUS ?

I'm not much of a symbol person either, I guess. But if it means something to you, go for it.

You mention that this is something he has to come up with on his own - have you talked to him about it at all?

No I haven't. I think he would do this if I asked. I don't want my wishes inked on his body. I'd want his own heart expressed- a sign for me. If he was willing to tattoo his body that would speak real dedication to me. It would defeat the purpose if I asked him. It would be just like our vows I guess...the minister told us what to say and we repeated it. Since he was with someone else before our first anniversary, I can say that they were not a real expression of what was really in his heart.

I started this thread because I though maybe somebody out there would like the idea and ponder it for their own BS. For me, this is would be a biggie.

My H, on his own, designed and had his first tattoo placed on his right shoulder blade as a sign of his dedication to me and our family, six months after dday.

He designed a Celtic cross that has a ribbon draped around it. My name and my three children's names are written in each of the turns of the ribbon. It turned out amazing - and I loved it because he did it on his own and without my input.

I totally understand your feelings regarding you wanting your H to show his eternal love for you using symbolism - such as a tattoo. I do believe that asking him to do that will cheapen the effect.