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Divorce/Separation :
Mediation or normal process for filing?

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 stungbytravel (original poster member #37225) posted at 5:01 PM on Monday, May 27th, 2013

So I am finally coming to terms with the fact that I will have to be the one who files for divorce.

My state offers regular divorce or mediation. It's a no fault state. I am trying to figure out which path to take.

Mediation would be half the price. We have no kids and property separation would probably be easy. We have only been married for 5 years. However, I would really like to stick it to him and have him served.

What do you guys think?

posts: 264   ·   registered: Oct. 22nd, 2012
id 6350983
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Phoenix1 ( member #38928) posted at 6:51 PM on Monday, May 27th, 2013

How quickly do you want it to be over? How likely is he to work civilly toward an agreement? How much money do you want to give an attorney for, possibly, the exact same outcome?

Those are the kind of questions you need to ask. I could go either way and am trying for the faster, easier dissolution because I want POS out of my life as quickly as possible. I have plenty of evidence to go the ugly route and could file for D on grounds of adultery, but I just want him gone. Spending the extra legal money may give me personal satisfaction, but because we are an equal distribution state, it won't change the final outcome in any way (except make some attorneys richer). My practical side is ruling my emotional side, even though I would love nothing more than to humiliate him in a courtroom...

fBS - Me
Xhole - Multiple LTAs/2 OCs over 20+yrs
Adult Kids
Happily divorced!

You can't go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending. ~C.S. Lewis~

posts: 9059   ·   registered: Apr. 9th, 2013   ·   location: Land of Indifference
id 6351082
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Coraline ( member #36434) posted at 8:55 PM on Monday, May 27th, 2013

If you just want to have him served, can't you file yourself and still do mediation? Or have a lawyer file for you and then go through mediation? In my state, it's not an either/or choice before filing. You can do either one AFTER you are served or have someone served. Personally I'd let it go, but if it means that much to you...lol

Me: BW, 34 Him: WH, 35
3 Kids: 9, 3, and 1
Decree nisi will become absolute in January. We are DONE.

posts: 771   ·   registered: Aug. 11th, 2012
id 6351200
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