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Sad in AZ (original poster member #24239) posted at 11:46 AM on Friday, July 19th, 2013
The X called me yesterday; he'd heard about my move. As background information, he always wanted to get a 2nd house in the area I'm moving to; he wanted to be a 'snowbird', living in AZ in the winter and NY in the summer. I didn't want two homes 
He offered come to Houston to help me move; I said it would be silly to fly in for that. He countered that he could drive--it's a 17-hour drive 
I thanked him but reiterated that it would not make sense, and in any event, I had hired movers to help me.
I asked if he was on vacation, and he said, no disability leave--he had blacked out at work the other day and had also had a kidney stone attack Really?? He was going to drive 17 hours to help me pack after all of that??
The conversation drifted inevitably to how awful his job was, how he can't retire for a few more years, yada, yada. At the end, I said, "In retrospect, this job with corrections was not a great idea." (It's also where he met the OW.) He got very quiet and said, "No; it fucked everything up."
No, XH; you fucked everything up, but thankfully, you freed me. 
You are important and you matter. Your feelings matter. Your voice matters. Your story matters. Your life matters. Always.
Me: FBS (no longer betrayed nor a spouse)-63
D-day: 2007 (two years before finding SI)
S: 6/2010; D: 3/2011
newnormal ( member #21925) posted at 1:02 PM on Friday, July 19th, 2013
kidney stone attack
Love the karma story, but it you really wanted him to hurt, a kidney stone is really painful.
I loved the part where he admitted that the job was a bad idea. Poor baby, bad choices catching up with him. 
BS 43 (me)
FWH 48
D-day 9/07
Dont retreat, reload.
"Pull that knife out of your back - and sever the fuel line to that bus you got thrown under" Bufffalo
cmego ( member #30346) posted at 1:51 PM on Friday, July 19th, 2013
No, XH; you fucked everything up, but thankfully, you freed me.
^^^^This.
me...BS, 46 years old.
Divorced
FaithFool ( member #20150) posted at 2:06 PM on Friday, July 19th, 2013
Wow. That is crazy. 
DDay: June 15, 2008
Mistakenly married Mr. Superfreak
20 years of OWs, WTF?
Divorced Dec 26, 2011
"Life is a shipwreck, but we must not forget
to sing in the lifeboats". -- Voltaire
SBB ( member #35229) posted at 2:22 PM on Friday, July 19th, 2013
No, XH; you fucked everything up, but thankfully, you freed me.
Skan's tagline has always moved me: Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.
I may have reached a point where I'd piss on him if he was on fire.... eventually!!
She11ybeanz ( member #27457) posted at 2:33 PM on Friday, July 19th, 2013
Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.
OMG...I love this!!! 
That is what my ex-husband and sperm donor were....big fat ugly anchors... sink baby sink!!! Momma ship has set sail!!! (with her little buoy in tow!!) 
[This message edited by She11ybeanz at 8:35 AM, July 19th (Friday)]
"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"
ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12
Sad in AZ (original poster member #24239) posted at 5:15 PM on Friday, July 19th, 2013
He also said, "You sound good." to which I responded, "Yes; I am good."
You are important and you matter. Your feelings matter. Your voice matters. Your story matters. Your life matters. Always.
Me: FBS (no longer betrayed nor a spouse)-63
D-day: 2007 (two years before finding SI)
S: 6/2010; D: 3/2011
ajsmom ( member #17460) posted at 5:41 PM on Friday, July 19th, 2013
Man, I love, love, love messing with their minds being us newly Miss Independent's and all.
Woo Hoo!
AJ's MOM
Fidelity isn't a feeling...it's a choice.
"Truth has no special time of its own. Its hour is now - always." - Albert Schweitzer
____________________________________________
Me: BW - Him: 200+ # tumor removed 7/09
One AMAZING DS - 34
Amazonia ( member #32810) posted at 6:04 PM on Friday, July 19th, 2013
This is great.
"You yourself deserve your love and affection as much as anybody in the universe." -Buddha
"Let's face it, life is a crap shoot." -Sad in AZ
torn2bits ( member #28376) posted at 6:36 PM on Friday, July 19th, 2013
Good for you Sad! As if you were really going to say "yes, I would love for you to come help me move.....so you can be my knight in shining armor and I can nurse you and your kidney problem!". He should wake up from that dream now!
Me: 45/WH (SA): 49
M: 26 years 3 kids over 10 yrs old
EA/ PA Dec. 2009 -Divorce halted
gahurts ( member #33699) posted at 8:27 PM on Friday, July 19th, 2013
t/j:
Momma ship has set sail!!! (with her little buoy in tow!!)
But you have a little goil !
end t/j
He also said, "You sound good." to which I responded, "Yes; I am good."
^^^^ THIS!!! Good for you SAZ!
"Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indominable will" - Mahatma Gandi
"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - Aubrie
wildbananas ( member #10552) posted at 9:23 PM on Friday, July 19th, 2013
He also said, "You sound good." to which I responded, "Yes; I am good."
You go, girl. 
Travel light, live light, spread the light, be the light. ~ Yogi Bhajan
Williesmom ( member #22870) posted at 9:28 PM on Friday, July 19th, 2013
You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright
aLadypilot ( member #1822) posted at 9:30 PM on Friday, July 19th, 2013
Beautiful! I love these stories.
Divorced 9/2010
Just married 7/4/13
cass ( member #24261) posted at 10:02 PM on Friday, July 19th, 2013
Wow, good for you....and it's so good to be.......well good
DDay - April 2008
Me - 58 and doing great, alone.
Don't put the key to your happiness in someone else's pocket!
TrulyReconciled ( member #3031) posted at 11:05 PM on Friday, July 19th, 2013
"In a time of deceit, telling the Truth is a revolutionary act."
burnt_toast ( member #16891) posted at 2:14 AM on Saturday, July 20th, 2013
Great!
I may have not gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.
- Douglas Adams
courageous ( member #34477) posted at 3:10 AM on Saturday, July 20th, 2013
That's is so awesome!
No, XH; you fucked everything up, but thankfully, you freed me.
Free is a great feeling. Hope your move goes well.
Me: BW (in my 40's) Him: ExWH EA/PA with MOW coworker(also married). He ended up marrying his mistress.
259 ( member #22860) posted at 3:17 AM on Saturday, July 20th, 2013
so pleased he waited till you moved on before going fishing
Me = FBS
Him = gone
things that happen in my life do not define who I am. I get to choose to be the best I can be, for me. cause I'm worth it.
stronger08 ( member #16953) posted at 12:33 PM on Saturday, July 20th, 2013
You handled that perfectly.
You cant eat soup with chopsticks.
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