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Unagie (original poster member #37091) posted at 6:51 PM on Saturday, July 27th, 2013
I think he has a new OW....no solid proof. I asked him if he's hiding something and he tells me no, he knows monogamy is still important to me. I burst into tears out of nowhere during training today. Please no timber I don't think I can handle it at the moment, if you feel it is absolutely necessary then fine. I'm just hurting, gut has been screaming and that sent me to finally break and check our phone bill after months of not looking. He has over 100 texts picture messages included to a number with a florida area code I've never seen before. One day he texted this person from 10am until 1am. I'm so fucking stuck, I don't want anymore pain when I am finally picking myself up.
lostmommy ( member #33440) posted at 6:54 PM on Saturday, July 27th, 2013
(((unagie))) Sometimes you just have to listen to what your gut is telling you, no matter how much it hurts. I'm sorry you're going through it again.
Me (BS): 32, Mommy to J: 2 1/2 Divorced: 4/10/13
Sometimes you find yourself in the middle of nowhere, and sometimes, in the middle of nowhere, you find yourself
LosferWords ( member #30369) posted at 6:55 PM on Saturday, July 27th, 2013
(((unagie)))
No timber, just hugs.
ZenMumWalking ( member #25341) posted at 6:59 PM on Saturday, July 27th, 2013
((((Unagie))))
I'm so sorry you are hurting, the pain of it all is unbearable.
As for no solid proof: trust your gut.
((((Unagie))))
Me (BS), Him (WH): late-50's
3 DS: 26, 25, 22
M: 30+ (19 1/2 at Dday)
Dday: Dec 2008
Wanted R, not gonna happen (in permanent S)
Used to be DeadMumWalking, doing better now
Unagie (original poster member #37091) posted at 7:05 PM on Saturday, July 27th, 2013
Who the fuck sends over 100 messages in one day. Seriously? Apparently I sent him 4 around this time and it shows he never responded to any of mine. I was asking if he was eating dinner out, if I should order food or wait for him. I was telling him about an issue I had with work. But he responded to this person. Seriously over 100 fucking messages in a day!?
still2suspicious ( member #31722) posted at 7:09 PM on Saturday, July 27th, 2013
Sending hugs (((unagie)))
I am so so sorry for your pain 
Me: BSHim: WHDDay: LTEA Every storm runs out of rain - Gary Allen
D final 2/23
WoundedOpus ( member #39521) posted at 7:49 PM on Saturday, July 27th, 2013
(((Unagie)))
Seeing things in black and white on a call log are devastating. I remember adding up the minutes one month between FWH and MCOW (back before he texted). It was December. They talked for 40 HOURS. A lot of that was over a weeks vacation, 3 holidays and my birthday. I have no clue how he managed it, what lies he must have told me to get away and talk 
What's sadder still is seeing my own number on there, lightly sprinkled through. Most calls lasting ONE minute where it was probably him leaving me a vmail, maybe a 2-3 minutes call or two.
I'm so so so sorry you're going through this again. Like you said, who the fuck sends over 100 messages in one day...only someone up to no good I'm afraid 
I'm so sorry he's causing you this pain.
Me: BW 37
Him: WH 38
(DDay: 2/2008)
13 years, 5 kids...Seven years of Limbo
“I don't want to get to the end of my life and find that I have just lived the length of it. I want to have lived the width of it as well." ~ Diane Ackerman
seekingclarity ( new member #39676) posted at 7:49 PM on Saturday, July 27th, 2013
I am so very sorry you are suffering. Who sends that many text messages in a day? Why my STBXWH and the OW. Perhaps he and your husband are long lost cousins because Florida seems to be the place to find OW these days. It is horrible and painful and I am so so sorry that you are hurting. Try to take care of yourself.
Me: BS (50's, but No One Would Know)
Him: STBWXH - PA/CA/NPD Serial Cheater (50's going on 12)
D-Day: Every Day?
4 Outstanding Offspring
Tragedy in life normally comes with betrayal and compromise . . .
Unagie (original poster member #37091) posted at 8:08 PM on Saturday, July 27th, 2013
I'm laying on my bed because of my back pain with my desk pulled in front of me for training. He is napping next to me and I just want to yell in his ear, loud and shrill so it hurts. I won't I'm learning to bide my time.
meplusfour ( member #38958) posted at 9:30 PM on Saturday, July 27th, 2013
Take care of yourself. My heart breaks for you.
BW (me)42
WH 44
3 daughters, 1 son
Married 10 years, together 13
DDay 3/14/2013, four year PA
In R
"Sometimes you have to accept the fact that certain things will never go back to the way they used to be."
Unagie (original poster member #37091) posted at 11:15 PM on Saturday, July 27th, 2013
He is planning to go out again tonight, heard him mention the movies when he was on the phone with his BFF. This would be the third night in a row he is going out. My back is killing me, but you know his BFF's GF is out of town so he has to keep him company because he's lonely. Really he's lonely? I'm laid up in bed because of this fucking pain, on pain meds which I never take because I hate being on medications but it's okay to leave me alone. Thank you, every day you show me how much I actually meant to you.
Oh thanks you brought me some food from where you guys went!? Oh thanks you did my bag of laundry because you were going to do yours anyway!? (I actually do appreciate that one). When's the last time you talked to me, asked me if you could help me, showed interest in my life. My mom calls me everyday to make sure I'm okay, so does my BFF. My dad calls me every 2-3 days, my brother once a week. Everyone else in my life who I do not live with I feel cares for me more then this man. Add those fucking messages to it and I'm so fucking done. He's showing me what I mean to him, I think I need to start believing it. He wants me around and is capable of doing a kind act here or there for me, but actual commitment and relationship stuff...nada. I can't stop loving him, my heart breaks so much but I can't live like this I know this...I'm losing the person I want to be by allowing this to happen. Thank you for listening guys.
caregiver9000 ( member #28622) posted at 11:19 PM on Saturday, July 27th, 2013
Me: fortysomething, independent, happy,
XH "Stretch" (and Skew!) ;)
two kids, teens. Old enough I am truly NO CONTACT w/ NPD zebraduck
S 5/2010
D 12/2012
brokendancer7 ( member #39911) posted at 11:24 PM on Saturday, July 27th, 2013
I'm so sorry you are going through this. I feel your pain in the pit of my stomach.
It's kind of like a monster in a horror movie - they finally kill it, but then all of a sudden it gets back up and keeps going.
Kajem ( member #36134) posted at 12:00 AM on Sunday, July 28th, 2013
(((((Unagie)))))
Deep breath....and again.
You will find a way thru this. You are stronger than you realize. We are here for you.
Hugs,
K
I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - UnknownRelationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.
authenticnow ( member #16024) posted at 1:43 AM on Sunday, July 28th, 2013
DS, you are forever in my heart. Thank you for sharing your beautiful spirit with me. I will always try to live by the example you have set. I love you and miss you every day and am sorry you had to go so soon, it just doesn't seem fair.
Unagie (original poster member #37091) posted at 1:57 AM on Sunday, July 28th, 2013
Taking a pain med. Thankfully it knocks me out and gets rid of the pain simultaneously. I might get some real rest, probably not but here's to hoping. Today was shit. Maybe tomorrow will be better. Thanks for listening again...
JanaGreen ( member #29341) posted at 5:49 AM on Sunday, July 28th, 2013
I am so sorry you are dealing with this on top of the back pain. Your head knows how to handle this. Your heart will catch up. Be gentle with yourself and heal. I hope you feel better soon.
sisoon ( Moderator #31240) posted at 8:13 PM on Sunday, July 28th, 2013
(((Unagie)))
You deserve so much better!
fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex apDDay - 12/22/2010Recover'd and R'edYou don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.
HeartInADustpan ( member #38341) posted at 8:46 PM on Sunday, July 28th, 2013
So sorry you're having to deal with this, Unagie. Go with your gut.
((((Unagie))))
Hang in there.
Just call me Heart. :)
Reconciling
"If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything" ~Mark Twain
Spideysense ( member #39591) posted at 1:54 PM on Monday, July 29th, 2013
So sorry that you are dealing with this..again.
You are much stronger than i would be, biding your time, not screaming in his ear while he naps next to you (I would).
No advice-just sending good thoughts your way.
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