SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

I recently made a reapperance in JFO (new now ex S/O not old exWH...just to clarify)have lurked since my first go round here... I don't know how to deal with this...so here I am seeking collective SI wisdom.

I had a growth removed from the small of my back last week. My Doctor was sure it was nothing to be worried about. She took a good margin and went to 1.5 mm. 8 stitches to close me up.

Today I got the call, I wasn't expecting results until I went for the stitches out next Wednesday.

Malignant Melanoma.

She's referring me immediatly to a plastic surgeon for a larger excise and to the Cancer Clinic. I should have appointments next week at both.

Holy hell I'm scared. This is fast. Has anyone been through this? What should I be asking, expecting?

((( Lighthouse )))

((((lighthouse))))

sending SI mojo

Do some research on the different stages. Prognosis and treatment are based on depth of the cancer and on if any lymph nodes have been affected.

Sending you positive mojo and offering up prayers.

[This message edited by purplejacket4 at 11:20 PM, August 1st (Thursday)]

(((LighthouseHeart)))

I am so sorry about your diagnosis!! I don't have much advice as I haven't had melanoma but I have had basal cell carcinoma. It runs in the family. My dad had malignant melanoma a few years ago and fortunately it hadn't spread to the lymph nodes yet.

The Internet is a blessing (ie: SI) and a curse. There is so much unfiltered information out there to freak you out but I can't stop myself from "researching" my ailments before my Dr. appointments. Take advice and everything you read with a grain of salt.

I will say that getting a second opinion is always a good idea. Your Dr. may refer you to a specialist but that doesn't mean you can't get another opinion from a Dr. of your choice.

I'll be thinking of you!! Keep us posted!

Thank you guys - it's nice to see some response..hugs always welcome :)

I wrote things down as she was talking to me but now I'm not sure what they say lol...

The next excise will go wider and deeper to ensure that all the growth was removed by her the first time.

The referal to the plastic surgeon is because it's a deeper level of the skin layers...I think she said to 6mm and something about Breslo Depth? Because the excise will be much larger it needs a "Z" incision to make closing it back up and healing better?

The referal to the Cancer Clinic is for tracking and follow up.

She said that in the small of the back you're not dealing with lymph glands so not a concern. There was no sign of invasion to blood vessels (a good thing?)

The quickness she said is that IF there was any small bit still there the area has been disturbed and could spread and grow.

I've been with this Doctor for 35 years, I was 12 and she was just starting her practice, I do not question her at all nor the collegues she has ever refered me to for something - her care is top notch. Hell, I have her home number and she will do a house call still for me if needed.

I will ask her on Wednesday about staging..and ya I've already made the mistake of google thy ailment I closed it out and am not going to make myself crazy...so I came here instead lol

It's still scary. Heck I watch the Big C ya know?

((((((lighthouse)))))))

((((LighthouseHeart))))

(((((Lighthouse)))))

(((((Lighthouse)))))

Lighthouse, my h had a deep basal cell, required the Z incision. That just refers to how they cut ( in a z shape vs straight line)to keep scarring to a minimum in a place that does not typically have a lot of excess fat or skin (unlike most of me )

Hugs to you and sending prayers for early stage.

((((((Lighthouse)))))))

I'm keeping you in my prayers.

(((((Lighthouse)))))

Sending you good thoughts.

My best friend had that at the top of the center of her back. Excision and follow-up treatment took care of it. It took awhile to heal, because they removed lots of tissue, and that actually troubled her the most.

She has follow-up checks every six months for awhile, then it dropped to once a year, and after ten years went to checks every 18 months.

((((lighthouse))))

Sending mojo, strength, and prayers.

My friend at work just had that. They dug REAL deep in her arm which she said was not pleasant and then they called and said they got all of it - and it was malignant melanoma too.

I think they are just going to watch her lymphnodes and stuff for the next six months.

I also had a friend who had it on her ankle. They went all the way down to the bone on her, twice .. and got it all. She's been fine for a few years now.

If they catch it fairly fast, then it's all good.

I had one removed by a plastic surgeon in 1998. They went pretty deep (I had soreness for nearly a month), but no reoccurrence. If they catch it early, they can usually get all of it.

Cat

Hugs to you!

A bit of practical advice from a mom who's spent many years dealing with cancer centers, etc. for her kid:

1. Do you have a friend who can go with you to appts to take notes and ask questions? That way you do not have to worry about being focused. (That's my job in our family; FWH is the "I'm too distraught about our kid to be focused" one).

2. Follow up by email with your doc and with any specialists.

3. If there is a team approach at the plastic surgeon or (more likely) the cancer center, get to know the top nurse on your team, or the case manager. They will be very helpful. Even the most helpful and nice doctor is usually not as quick and proactive as the nurse or case manager.

My thoughts are with you, LighthouseHeart!

So sorry to hear this news.

Covering you in prayer.

(((LHH)))

AJ's MOM

Sending good thoughts to you

(((Lighthouse)))

Sending you healing thoughts and MOJO!