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General :
Texted the OW

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Ashland13 ( member #38378) posted at 1:06 AM on Sunday, August 11th, 2013

Yes, I've wanted to contact Ow, too, for different things.

For a time I wanted to ask her how does it feel to have "won" a married man away from a pregnant wife, little girl and home he built for over 10 years and ruined his life for.

Sometimes I want to tell her to run, for there's no doubt that she is only a pit stop on this road he's chosen.

I'm of the opinion that Ow is only a factor in all that he's done and also a convenient situation-probably someone with some money in the family and some type of affluence to feed the narcissism.

But I pride myself on NC with Floozy because it's one of the only bits of pride I have left at present and I don't want to feed her ego. Already I picture them snickering and whooping it up about me, so that image helps to keep me away.

I am glad that you got that done, Am.

I've thought for a while that the type of person to be an OP has to be a bully of sorts, in a way, don't they? To be able to pull it off, that is and willing to step on another person. I think it becomes a territory thing.

Ashland 13

A person is a person, no matter how small. -Dr. Suess

Perserverance and spirit have done wonders in all ages.

-George Washington

posts: 3034   ·   registered: Feb. 7th, 2013   ·   location: New England
id 6443137
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RidingHealingRd ( member #33867) posted at 5:19 AM on Sunday, August 11th, 2013

Would you expect anything more from a person who thinks nothing of selfishly fulfilling his/her desires, all the while aiding in the destruction of another's life?

She is nothing more that trash, absolute trash.

ME: 60 BS
HIM: 67 WH
Married: 35 years
D'Day: 10/29/10
in R 10 years and it's working but he is putting 200% into it (as he should) to make it right again.

The truth hurts, but I have never seen it cause the pain that lies do.

posts: 2519   ·   registered: Nov. 9th, 2011
id 6443338
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summerain ( member #37439) posted at 5:29 AM on Sunday, August 11th, 2013

HOLY FUCK AML04

You have to stand up for yourself. How DARE SHE.

No way, confront her in person and see what "a c***" she can be then. Or write a facebook post. I had a sort of similar situation as well. the first time was dday by ourselves... no audience. The second time... I told everyone and I told her I was telling everyone. And WH also told everyone (he did it very publicly)

You are worth so much more than that disgusting bitch.

She just tried to put you 'in your place'. I found standing up for myself towards a similar ow as yours as empowering and really made me turn a corner in my life.

I seem to remember Williesmom having a very funny story. Hopefully she sees this and shares it with you :)

[This message edited by lauren123 at 11:30 PM, August 10th (Saturday)]

OW1 inadvertently let me know WH loves English breakfast tea. Never ever saw him drink it. And I never will.

posts: 818   ·   registered: Nov. 10th, 2012   ·   location: Australia
id 6443343
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Lionne ( member #25560) posted at 5:41 AM on Sunday, August 11th, 2013

I sent letters too. I did so through anonymous email accounts and made sure they were blocked from responding. I'm glad I did. I don't really care if they laughed about it or not. It was something I did for me, letting them know what I thought of them.

Me-BS-71 in May HIM-SAFWH-74 I just wanted a normal life.Normal trauma would have been appreciated.

posts: 8533   ·   registered: Sep. 18th, 2009   ·   location: In my head
id 6443355
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MrsDoubtfire ( member #24786) posted at 7:42 AM on Sunday, August 11th, 2013

I found out by googling that texts can be sent anonymously over the computer. I text bombed that bitch like it was world war 3

t/j- how on earth do you do this??!

Awesomeness to you. That is hilarious.

BS(Me) FWH(Him) DDay 05.09
A went underground. True R 02.10
I won't let another woman reap the benefit of enjoying the man my H has now become†

posts: 1634   ·   registered: Jul. 12th, 2009
id 6443398
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MrsDoubtfire ( member #24786) posted at 7:59 AM on Sunday, August 11th, 2013

I spent many weeks in text contact with ow post Dday ( I pumped her for information and she obliged ) then, once the dust settled, I texted her BFF's boyfriend from my FWH phone ( this couple were ow beasties and complicit in the A) and pretended to be FWH. The text said;" how's life mate? Mine is fantastic. I cannot believe how lucky I feel that Mrs D forgave me. Our M is better than it ever was and I still cannot believe I almost threw that away for a c*** like "ow"!! Boy do I feel disgusted that I ever put my dick anywhere near that!! Sooo not worth anything that one!"

I sent this after I had stopped texting her though.

I KNEW it would get shown to ow and the response FWH got back from this guy confirmed ow was devastated.

FWH to this day doesn't know I did that as I deleted the texts but, even if he did, he wouldn't be mad at me.

My weeks of texting with the ow was to ensure they didn't get back together and to let her know their "relationship" was built on lies. The more information I gave her the more she grew to understand she was nothing more than his plaything. SHE came out of her own foginess the more I told her things like, "yep, he said he was taking you there on holiday? No sweetie, he said that because he'd booked that holiday for us already!" and "He told you he was working all over New Year?! No, we spent it in bed with a bottle of champagne....." Etc etc etc etc etc

Empowering- very much so.

I took back the control she had taken from me and it felt great!!

She even texted me one day to say FWH hadn't contacted her in a few days ( yes, initially he tried to crawl back there) and said she was worried he'd killed himself over the ending of the A. I took great joy texting her back and saying "oh, I wouldn't worry too much about his mental state. He isn't feeling suicidal. At least, I don't think he is. He is currently stuffing another cookie into his mouth whilst begging me to take him back and he doesn't look dead to me!!"

Oh how I played

BS(Me) FWH(Him) DDay 05.09
A went underground. True R 02.10
I won't let another woman reap the benefit of enjoying the man my H has now become†

posts: 1634   ·   registered: Jul. 12th, 2009
id 6443410
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Scubachick ( member #39906) posted at 9:16 AM on Sunday, August 11th, 2013

I love that your text got under her skin! I have never heard a another woman call herself the C word. She can mess with your husband but how dare you text her?! I "c***" believe it

posts: 1825   ·   registered: Jul. 23rd, 2013
id 6443429
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AussieMum ( member #36579) posted at 10:12 AM on Sunday, August 11th, 2013

Well, she used the right word to describe herself, didn't she?

These OW's are so *$&#@ arrogant! I texted OW2 after reading her and STBX's messages to each other. She responded with threats to get a restraining order on me, telling me to sort out my marital problems with my husband which had nothing to do with her (!), told me I am an 'unstable' person and to never come near her or her family.... effing bitch.

She didn't have the last word though I texted her and told her I'd drop off STBX's things on her front lawn that evening and perhaps her husband might help her take them all inside??

I'm glad you had the chance to get your feelings off your chest. Good for you. She's certainly revealed her true c*** colors

Me 47
ExH 51
EA Jun-Aug 12 (OW1)FB flirting and then EA/PA with OW2 (Aug-Dec 12). New OW Jan 13, introduced her to the kids immediately.
Married 10 years, together 14yrs
2 kids (DS13 & DD8)
Separated Jan 13. Divorced Jun 14

posts: 185   ·   registered: Aug. 23rd, 2012   ·   location: Australia
id 6443437
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 AML04 (original poster member #39682) posted at 12:32 PM on Sunday, August 11th, 2013

I want to respond to everyone but once again I'm on my phone!

I would love to respond and put her in her in her place. I hate that she probably thinks me not contacting her was because of what she said. But...as you can see, she's obviously not right. And God forbid she actually means what she says. I can handle it but she knows where I live and I have a son. I refuse to bring that level of crazy into my life anymore. The best thing I can do is move on from her. She's not worth my time.

I said my piece, and that's all I wanted.

Edited for typo

[This message edited by AML04 at 6:36 AM, August 11th (Sunday)]

Me-BS Him-WH DS 5/12
Met 2000, Married 2004
DDay 5/26/13, TT through 8/13
2.5 yr EA w/co-worker, PA 12/12 to 4/13
Hopeful for R

posts: 876   ·   registered: Jun. 27th, 2013   ·   location: MA
id 6443474
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dov46 ( member #29283) posted at 8:35 PM on Sunday, August 11th, 2013

"I took great joy texting her back and saying "oh, I wouldn't worry too much about his mental state. He isn't feeling suicidal. At least, I don't think he is. He is currently stuffing another cookie into his mouth whilst begging me to take him back and he doesn't look dead to me!!"

*****************************

I absolutely LOVE this!!!!!

*****************************

"I texted her and told her I'd drop off STBX's things on her front lawn that evening and perhaps her husband might help her take them all inside??"

*****************************

And this!!!!! You girls ROCK!

[This message edited by dov46 at 2:36 PM, August 11th (Sunday)]

ME:BS (46)
HIM:WH (37)
Husband caught in EA/PA 1/09. Filed for Divorce 2/09.
Reconciled 3/09....remains rocky!
Dday #2?-1/23/12
Divorced 6/26/12
It's the friends you can call up at 4:00 a.m. that matter....Marlene Dietrich

posts: 193   ·   registered: Aug. 10th, 2010   ·   location:
id 6443866
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sunshine226 ( member #38851) posted at 10:22 PM on Sunday, August 11th, 2013

So many different outcomes of contact with OW

In my situation, I have had contact with OW and it didnt make a bit of difference, although my conscience is now clear, I finally told her everything, that WH and I have been together and never broke up.

Her words when I told her we had sex was "well I'll have his bags packed, I am not going to be with a man who has his dick in another woman" Yes, she said that, this woman is a nut job......that was in January. The only thing that tramp did is make up a bunch of bullshit to tell WH about our conversation and make him question my true intentions, she told him I said I was going to take him back and then dump him.

But WH was here one time, OW thought he was at work, and I called her (about a month after my full disclosure) I asked her about taking him back, her story to me was completely different and WH was listening in the entire time....that was in February, he is still with her.

That was the last time I spoke to the OW and will be the last time I will have any contact with her. I wouldnt let her talk after her going on and on for about 5 mins, she apparantly loves to talk. In the end she told me off, said i was trying to come between her and WH, that I was pathetic and need to get a life.

She's a real physcho, even WH said that about a month ago, but she is his problem not mine

Me-BS (44)
Him-WS (47)
DDay 1/1/2012, common law for 22 1/2 years when he began A in September 2011
Status: moving on without him

posts: 234   ·   registered: Mar. 31st, 2013
id 6443973
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Housefulloflove ( member #38458) posted at 4:24 AM on Monday, August 12th, 2013

"I tend to be quite the c*** "

She certainly told the truth here.

I contacted the OW before I found out the EA was a PA. She wouldn't answer my calls or text. I never heard a word from her and not long after that she cut off contact with ex and left the country.

I don't know if she was scared of me or just didn't know what to say in response as she didn't speak/understand English very well (and no, my Ex doesn't speak her primary language at all!)

Me-29 Starting over
ExWH-29 Probable NPD, PA, manchild
3 beautiful young children
DDay 1/20/13 Admits PA
No remorse so NO R. DIVORCED! 9/2013

posts: 541   ·   registered: Feb. 15th, 2013   ·   location: USA
id 6444394
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kickboxer ( member #39858) posted at 6:38 AM on Monday, August 12th, 2013

Hell yes I called that biatch.

I put 2 and 2 together and figured out she was the one who had sent an anon gift card to my husband so he could purchase a new TV.

WH wouldn't admit to me that it was her, so I called her myself and confronted her.

Then I destroyed it while she was on the phone with me, and hung up on her.

She began harassing me via email, so I got a Harassment Injunction against her, and haven't heard a thing since.

BW - 42 (Me)
WH - 39 (2 ONS, 6m EA)
Married 15 years, 3 children
DD: 7/13/13
Status: Rugsweeping, I guess.

posts: 253   ·   registered: Jul. 18th, 2013   ·   location: Somewhere Out There
id 6444486
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