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General :
He just doesn't get it

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 changedforlife (original poster member #38474) posted at 2:12 AM on Sunday, August 11th, 2013

Why is he so thick? What is so hard to understand?

Today started out to be a pretty good day. We got outside and did something as a family. Nice. The A was not really on my mind during our outing.

We get home and I go outside with our DD while WH is inside. I come in the house to get the camera and WH is on the computer setting up a Twitter account. FYI, a lot of communicating between WH and OW was on twitter and my most recent discovery (3 weeks ago) that the A was still going on over the last 6 months when I thought we were trying to R, was by finding his secret twitter account.

When I asked what he was doing he said he was setting up a new twitter account and asked if I was OK with that. I told him I was uncomfortable with that and he said fine. I asked him how he thought that I would be OK with it and he mentions a convo that I do not recall that I said it would be all right. I asked if that was before or after the most recent discovery and he said before. Well, obviously I must have been starting to trust him but look where that got me.

Anyway, he ended up getting mad at me because I went to the bedroom to read while he watched tv and it was supertime. Then he complained that he doesn't get to feel angry or anything besides happy or sorry now. And then he had the nerve to complain that I couldn't even go out yesterday to buy a few grocery items we needed. I spent the day in bed mostly because I felt so weary and depressed.

Now we are not talking.

Me - BS Him - WH (in our 50's)Together 31 years/ 1 teenager1st D-day - Jan 24/13 #? d-days from broken no contact and continued infidelity for several years. Attempted reconciliation.July 28/23 told him it was over and he wa

posts: 172   ·   registered: Feb. 17th, 2013   ·   location: Canada
id 6443193
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hardtimesinlife ( member #10468) posted at 2:53 AM on Sunday, August 11th, 2013

I'm sorry. He is sending red flags.

Be vigilant.

Big hugs.

Ddays 2004 & 2007
I cut my losses mid 2013
Feeling happier every day :)

posts: 7056   ·   registered: Apr. 20th, 2006   ·   location: Florida
id 6443217
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brkn_heartd ( member #30396) posted at 3:24 AM on Sunday, August 11th, 2013

I am sorry. You have every right to be upset. He knows that, he is trying to blameshift to you. Don't let him, you need to keep your boundaries tight. Take care of yourself.

Me-57 BS
Him 65-WS
Married 38 yrs, together 40
Affair Aug-Dec 09
official D-12/14/09
broke NC 1/31/10
second D 3/19/10

posts: 2137   ·   registered: Dec. 14th, 2010   ·   location: Northwesten US
id 6443239
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womaninflux ( member #39667) posted at 3:29 AM on Sunday, August 11th, 2013

Sorry but it might be time to ask him to move out.

He's acting like a pouty teenager who was grounded for bad grades or something. He's rebelling against you. Was he rebellious against his parents or teachers when he was a youth?

I make this assumptions because my SAWH was acting like this, too, well past D-Day and cutting off contact with the AP.

BS - mid-40's
SAWH - mid 40's
Kids - 2 elementary school aged
Getting tons of therapy and trying to "work it out"

posts: 932   ·   registered: Jun. 26th, 2013
id 6443243
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