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Offhispedestal (original poster member #32528) posted at 5:46 PM on Wednesday, August 21st, 2013
I found this article and I must say that A LOT made sense ! I don't feel that this is the only answer to WHY they did what they did. But I understand now why my H became the asshole he did, why he gave me ridiculous answers....it made me crazy..I was always like "you expect me to accept your BS answer?"
Please read!
http://www.examiner.com/article/third-stage-of-an-affair-discovery-addiction
ME-48
WH-49
Married 27
2Beautiful daughters
DD 6/26/10 (he broke down & confessed)
DD#2 3/14/11 H in OW's car
TT 7/1/11 (NC broken, through emails)
In R
krazy8516 ( member #40076) posted at 6:58 PM on Wednesday, August 21st, 2013
Very interesting.
Thanks, Offhispedestal!
me: BW, 30
him: WH, 25
us: edging closer to R every day
married 2y, together 2.5y
1 beautiful daughter, 23m
"Someday soon, I'm going to put my life together; Win or lose, I'm starting over again."
Offhispedestal (original poster member #32528) posted at 8:58 PM on Wednesday, August 21st, 2013
When I read the second half of this article it just clicked. Everything I read is EXACTLY how my H acted. The stupid justifications, the blame, His explanations only made sense to him!
ME-48
WH-49
Married 27
2Beautiful daughters
DD 6/26/10 (he broke down & confessed)
DD#2 3/14/11 H in OW's car
TT 7/1/11 (NC broken, through emails)
In R
Pass ( member #38122) posted at 9:19 PM on Wednesday, August 21st, 2013
I like how they use the terms "Loyal Spouse" and "Disloyal Spouse". They are much more active terms for what actually happened.
Divorced the cheater and living my best life now.
The best thing about hitting rock bottom is that everything after that looks fucking fabulous.
myperfectlife ( member #39801) posted at 11:47 PM on Wednesday, August 21st, 2013
Bingo...sounds exactly like my WH. If that stage is finally over maybe my marriage can survive.
I am waiting to find out.
I cannot be responsible for another's personal growth.
DDay#1 of a "cheatillion" 4/1/13
Divorce final 11/04/13
ILINIA ( member #39836) posted at 12:04 AM on Thursday, August 22nd, 2013
I agree with the "loyal" and "disloyal" terms and like how we can be the "hero" of the marriage...it gives us a positive term vs a negative
[This message edited by ILINIA at 6:18 PM, August 21st (Wednesday)]
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