SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

I'm self employed, hense no money cos I've missed that much all my customers have gone elsewhere.

My parents gave me one months rent already. I've sold anything of value which wasn't much after he cleaned me out. He even took 2 sky boxes and came back and stole the third, which was plugged in to my 25 quid charity shop tv he got me to replace our massive flat screen he took.

God, I've really been such a mug.

You really have not been a mug. Promise.

I think we all have felt like that at some point (I certainly have!) but this is all their doing. Yes, there may have been red flags BUT how were you to know it would have turned out like this?

People who cheat are liars, and liars do not have much of a conscience, IMHO, so they do whatever they need to do to keep things sweet and then fuck everything up when they have been busted.

Just focus on you, we are here for you to help you through this awful time

I've supported him & his 3 kids for over 3 years. They've had every penny of my wage & I had to fight him for a fair share of what was left. He's not worked in years so I've been the sole earner, my wage plus benefits and I gave total control of it all to a man who only ever had his own interest at heart.

My reward for trusting this man, with everything has been financial ruin & years of lies.

I've supported him & his 3 kids for over 3 years. They've had every penny of my wage & I had to fight him for a fair share of what was left. He's not worked in years so I've been the sole earner, my wage plus benefits and I gave total control of it all to a man who only ever had his own interest at heart.

My reward for trusting this man, with everything has been financial ruin & years of lies.

Your reward is also a stronger heart and freedom from lies and toxicity -

Yes, we paid a price, but I promise you,

it is worth it!

Strength to you.

I'm felling numb on the surface but can feel a volcano building inside me and I don't know what to do with the pent up feelings I must be suppressing.

I tend to cope by pretending things are ok and I'm fine an eventual I am but I realise this is preventing me from fully learning my lesson & growing

He's tried to bypass my NC by going through a third party now.

He spent 4 hours and had my friend up till 2am on fb chat last night, trying all the rug-sweeping and side stepping responsibility he could, trying to shift the blame anywhere he could but on himself. He begged her to tell me he loves me and just wants to hold me and cuddle me.

Every single move I have seen him do (and has worked) previously he tried. Everyone except honesty and remorse.

This is the reply I just sent to her:

now I've had time to think and am not reacting from my heart my head knows what to do.

Would you please tell him that I don't want anything to do with him and that I've asked you not to mention him or anything he's doing/saying to me ever again.

He's still lying through his teeth. He is trying to convince me (and you) that the way he has treated me is acceptable and he should be allowed to have emotional affairs, text, ring, visit other women all day, every day and I should fall for his crap about them just being friends.

Would you also tell him that if he continues to slander my name by saying I sent someone round to beat him up I will report it to the police & request an injunction against him through the courts so he can never come near me again.

I still love him but I would rather be alone than accept the kind of relationship he offers. One of lies, half truths, omissions & insecurity.

I'm going to wait for a man who knows the difference between friendship & an emotional affair.

I want to say a huge Thank You to everyone on here for your support. It's that which has made me see what is acceptable & be strong enough to stand firm. Without it I would have crumbled and contacted him.

[This message edited by IndianDreams at 10:01 AM, October 19th (Saturday)]

his reply to my friend:

ok thank u (friend) i understand she dont want me or love me but i dont understand what she means about emotional affair it is just friends but she wont listen to what i say i would give everything up for her , this is not fair on u i need to speek to her but i will be dead before that happens oh well ok thanks again if u could just pass this one on to (IndianDreams) and i wont bother u or her again... thanks WH