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Crazy things OP said

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 plainpain (original poster member #40139) posted at 8:38 AM on Friday, November 1st, 2013

So many strange and bizarro things have been said since Dday, I feel like I should have kept a list. This one, I can't figure out. After my H told me OW was pregnant, and before he/we had gone NC with her, she called our house to yell at him:

"Who told you to tell your wife?? You've ruined everything!"

What does that even MEAN? How was he not supposed to tell his WIFE? I seriously don't know what she was thinking.

Me: Believer, 40s
Him: Liar, 40s
Married 19 years
1 year EA/2 month PA/incidental infidelities I can't begin to process
OC born 2014
OW:21
In successful R. It only hurts now when it rains.

posts: 875   ·   registered: Jul. 31st, 2013
id 6545675
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Clarrissa ( member #21886) posted at 10:10 AM on Friday, November 1st, 2013

Simple answer: by telling you, he ruined her little fantasy of perhaps getting an insta family. Stepping into your life and taking over.

Not to mentioned he probably ruined any chance she had of presenting herself as "a good person". But I think it's mainly the first one: he ruined her fantasy.

Oh, one bit of advice even though I'm an FWS: have yoir H demand a paternity test if it's even *remotely* possible that he's the father, just in case she tries to use the child as a way to stay in your life.

BH Cee64D - 50
FWW (me) - 51


All affairs are variations on a theme. No one has 'Beethoven's 5th' to everyone else's 'Chopsticks'.

posts: 6192   ·   registered: Dec. 3rd, 2008   ·   location: A better place
id 6545701
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MrsDoubtfire ( member #24786) posted at 11:20 AM on Friday, November 1st, 2013

Our OW said her mom always though FWH was a hypocrite for attending church whilst having an A

Hey OWmom. Isn't a hypocrite a mother who knows her daughter's having an A with a married man too!!

FFS!! Sorry- it just makes me seethe at their stupidness at times!

BS(Me) FWH(Him) DDay 05.09
A went underground. True R 02.10
I won't let another woman reap the benefit of enjoying the man my H has now become†

posts: 1634   ·   registered: Jul. 12th, 2009
id 6545744
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LivinginLimbo ( member #35004) posted at 1:34 PM on Friday, November 1st, 2013

Shortly after D-Day, the whore blogged "why can't his wife just accept it?"

Um, maybe it's because I'm just one of those crazy people who thinks cheating is wrong!

As Clarissa said, it's about the destruction of this fantasy they've been living in.

BS - 65
WH - 63
Married 37 years


D-Day 2/12/12
D-Day 6/1/16 Caught him back online early enough that no physical contact took place but still devastating. This sucks.

posts: 1246   ·   registered: Mar. 6th, 2012
id 6545840
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OldCow18 ( member #39670) posted at 2:46 PM on Friday, November 1st, 2013

About 3.5 months after d-day I had had enough and I sent a letter to OW calling her out on her behavior. She responded with a non-apology apology, and stated that I should not contact her through "corporate email" in a scolding manner. I responded that I thought that was humorous given the hundreds of XXX penthouse forum type emails she sent to my husband for months through "corporate email" She's such an asshole.

Me, BW forty something, DD & DS,
Married to WH (49) 11 years, together 16
D-Day 6.8.13

posts: 620   ·   registered: Jun. 26th, 2013
id 6545918
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Ostrich80 ( member #34827) posted at 5:02 PM on Friday, November 1st, 2013

They are some ballsy bitches for sure. When I called ow out on the hundreds of texts and pics she'd exchanged with ws, she told me, "your so jealous and insecure and you ALWAYS think he's cheating on you". dumb ass skank

I didn't ALWAYS think he was cheating, until he WAS cheating.

Oh yea she also said my ws was old enough to be her dad so why would she be attracted to him. Now I know my ws is a stud (insert sarcasm) but seeing as how there is only 7 yrs diff in their age, I hardly see how he could have fathered a child at 7 yrs of age. So no, not old enough to be her dad

[This message edited by Ostrich80 at 11:06 AM, November 1st (Friday)]

BS..me
WS..him
Been with him over half my life
4kid
DD1 10-01-09 DD2 02-12-12 discovered it never ended
OW..nothing special. Just your average skank
Status..#$%@????

posts: 5738   ·   registered: Feb. 15th, 2012   ·   location: midwest
id 6546142
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sisoon ( Moderator #31240) posted at 12:28 AM on Saturday, November 2nd, 2013

ow reportedly said something like 'I can't stand dishonesty.' Then they decided I wasn't evolved enough to know the truth about their great love.

fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex apDDay - 12/22/2010Recover'd and R'edYou don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.

posts: 31119   ·   registered: Feb. 18th, 2011   ·   location: Illinois
id 6546697
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crazyblindsided ( member #35215) posted at 12:32 AM on Saturday, November 2nd, 2013

"I'll let you keep your husband if you let me keep my job."

Well let's just say I didn't really want my WH at that time and I made him fire her (she was his employee) that very same day.

fBS/fWS(me):52 Mad-hattered after DD (2008)
XWS:55 Serial Cheater, Diagnosed NPD
DD(22) DS(19)
XWS cheated the entire M spanning 19 years
Discovered D-Days 2006,2008,2012, False R 2014
Separated 9/2019; Divorced 8/2024

posts: 9075   ·   registered: Apr. 2nd, 2012   ·   location: California
id 6546702
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Blobette ( member #36519) posted at 12:45 AM on Saturday, November 2nd, 2013

In my case, the AP was angry at my WH for unilaterally telling me (he confessed). She was also upset that "now we won't be able to do all of the fun things we'd planned!" -- they had planned some excursions into NYC and nice meals. She was quite happy to keep it on a FWB level and hated the fact that he blew it up. AND she was really angry that other people found out about it. It was their secret.

People are so weird.

BS (me): 51
WS: 52
Married: 27 yrs
Kids: 2
OW: Co-worker, 7 yr LTA
DD 8/1/2012, Working on R

posts: 1064   ·   registered: Aug. 17th, 2012
id 6546715
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integritymatters ( member #23681) posted at 1:08 AM on Saturday, November 2nd, 2013

Let me see....

"When this gets out, I'll be the one that will pay"

"You don't get to know about sex with BH, because he doesn't get to know about sex with you"

"You know that you don't want to be with her [me]. You know you want to be with me and my BH"

That one was the craziest of all

There's plenty more... and loads not even infidelity related... Very, very, very glad to be done with AP and hers.

[This message edited by integritymatters at 7:10 PM, November 1st (Friday)]

I dropped my toast this morning and it landed butter side up! It's going to be a good day. :)

posts: 1482   ·   registered: Apr. 19th, 2009   ·   location: Canada
id 6546730
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Want2help ( member #20547) posted at 2:05 AM on Saturday, November 2nd, 2013

"your so jealous and insecure"

I got this line, too. Also, how I was "keeping him from the only person who ever loved him."

FBS/WS- me.
F(serial)WS/BS- him.

Madhatters. More Ddays than birthdays, at this point. His OC, my OC...

UPDATE: Divorcing after almost 20 years.

posts: 2588   ·   registered: Aug. 7th, 2008
id 6546779
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niaveone ( member #40317) posted at 3:38 AM on Saturday, November 2nd, 2013

"You guys obviously had problems!"

Yea, and the least of them was her, apparently.

Me: BS
Him: WS
Married: 24 years
2 children
2 DDays
Reconciling

posts: 511   ·   registered: Aug. 14th, 2013
id 6546869
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courageous ( member #34477) posted at 4:50 AM on Saturday, November 2nd, 2013

"I don't want your wife to think of me as the other woman."

Uh... news flash you ARE the other woman. and a lying, cheating, skank at that.

Me: BW (in my 40's) Him: ExWH EA/PA with MOW coworker(also married). He ended up marrying his mistress.

posts: 880   ·   registered: Jan. 9th, 2012   ·   location: Texas
id 6546919
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married2stranger ( member #34492) posted at 6:56 AM on Saturday, November 2nd, 2013

Ohh I have some good ones to

*I love you enough to not make you choose. (of course this was after NC so he had pretty much already chosen )

*to me after I informed her BH - "I STEPPED ON YOUR TOES, and you retaliated Feel better? " (um stepped on my toes, I'm pretty sure you did a lot more than that..... also not sure why she thought it was okay to communicate with my husband but the second I inform hers I'm ... in her words "a real piece of art " (pretty sure she meant piece of work, but she's never been the brightest crayon in the box! )

* I think my favorite though has to be in one of her pathetic emails after NC, when she said "I thought we were Honest with one another " LOL... honey it's an affair, he isn't even able to be honest with himself, wow, you really thought the man cheating on his wife and

Destroying his FAMILY was going to be honest with you? I'm sorry, but what was your IQ again ?"

D-Day - 10/22/2011
Married 5/29/2004 together 13years!

(Me)"I've been called worse"....
(WH)"Oh yeah, like what?"
(Me)"YOUR wife!!!"

posts: 136   ·   registered: Jan. 10th, 2012   ·   location: Limbo Land
id 6546995
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prowoman ( member #40761) posted at 4:34 PM on Saturday, November 2nd, 2013

WH's OW contacted me about "the truth" and "what she thought i deserved" blah blah blah. just trying to further drive the wedge between me and my H. Like, I get it you're trying to break up my marriage don't try to talk to me about it!

also - married2stranger

she thought it was okay to communicate with my husband but the second I inform hers I'm ... in her words "a real piece of art " (pretty sure she meant piece of work,

LMFAO. ty for that

posts: 181   ·   registered: Sep. 23rd, 2013
id 6547241
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Zayda1 ( member #35387) posted at 5:04 PM on Saturday, November 2nd, 2013

OW had a blog titled "Keeping (OW's name) Honest".

It has taken everything in my to not make a nasty comment on her blog. Fortunately she hasn't bogged in 6 months.

Married 10 years, together for 12 years
2 children (9 years & 6 years)
Discovery of PA 04/15/12 (It only lasted a "couple of weeks" but it still shattered my world.)

posts: 482   ·   registered: Apr. 19th, 2012
id 6547269
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eachdayisvictory ( member #40462) posted at 6:09 PM on Saturday, November 2nd, 2013

ow tried to give me advice;

-if you're going to get out, do it while the kids are young.

-maybe he (H) isn't good enough for you or for me

-you don't have the love of a 'man and a woman' with your H

-I never even looked at a man with a ring before

-if you are waiting for me to be out of his life, I'm never going to be. I love him and he loves me.

Fuck, not so funny. Pretty shitty actually. Damn, wanted to laugh at her like you guys. Boo.

me, BW: 37
FWH: 38
together 19 years, M 13 years
Dday: Feb 2013
LTA for 2+years
children: 2 boys age 6 and 9
Reconciled

posts: 530   ·   registered: Aug. 28th, 2013   ·   location: nova Scotia, Canada
id 6547346
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Marathonwaseasy ( member #40674) posted at 6:14 PM on Saturday, November 2nd, 2013

That I just have to let go...

I think not

Unless I'm holding you over the side of a cliff I'm letting go of nothing

Me BS, 41
Him WS, 45
EA and PA (PA for 11 months)
DDay 13/9/13
3 children - 15,12,3
WS has bipolar, no excuse...

"We're not broken, just bent. We can learn to love again."

posts: 421   ·   registered: Sep. 14th, 2013   ·   location: Ireland
id 6547350
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TheAmazingWondertwin ( member #40769) posted at 8:15 PM on Saturday, November 2nd, 2013

After NC she tried to text him.

First one was nice and just saying hi. We ignored it.

Next one was weepy and all "I am having a tough day- could really use a friend"

We ignored it.

The last one-

Her roommate had pictures of them from the window and was going to post then online. Her job was in jeapordy because of him. She can't believe after all she did to help him while he was struggling now he was leaving her to do "damage control". I can't believe you would do this to me... Blah blah blah.

Um honey? There were no pictures but nice try trying to scare him.

What damage control? My WH is an independent contractor and an A would have NO EFFECT on his job-

and seriously sweetie? the only damage control he needs to worry about is me not ripping your effing throat out.

Tough titties your job is on the line- should have thought about that before you had a relationship with your THIRD MM.

It appalled me that she was trying to scare him into contacting her- then guilt in him into it.

Even If there were pics- I already know what happened. I have the texts and my WHs confession.

She had nothing to bargain with.

There are stories about her getting mad because anyone she asked about me told her I was "beautiful, caring, a great mom, smart etc etc" she actually cried one night and told him she was sick if everyone telling her how great I was.

Then she got mad when he told her he was taking me away for a weekend in Rhode Island. "How do you think that makes me feel?" Se asked. Seriously? SERIOUSLY??

We have been solid NC since a week after Dday( when I read about NC on SI). And after her threatening texts two months ago- she has been quiet as a mouse.

[This message edited by Wondertwin at 2:19 PM, November 2nd (Saturday)]

Just call me Wonder

If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice.

The axe "forgets"- the tree remembers.

Divorced and super good with tha
2 DS- 15 and 16
DDay 1- 07-24-2013
DDay 2- June something or other 2017

posts: 1251   ·   registered: Sep. 24th, 2013   ·   location: East Coast
id 6547466
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ButterflyGirl ( member #38377) posted at 9:05 PM on Saturday, November 2nd, 2013

"I'm NOT a mistress!"

Um, okay. Whatever you say so.

xBW~ 40
Two DS~ 15 and 11

posts: 3123   ·   registered: Feb. 6th, 2013   ·   location: Flat Earth
id 6547503
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