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Gender Difference

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 Saleschick (original poster member #39772) posted at 12:32 AM on Saturday, November 9th, 2013

I was getting my car inspected today and the male owner of the shop let me know he heard about my ex and his married OW. This guy is probably closer to my ex than me and was a customer of my exs business. He was super tough on the exs actions, told me to stop talking to the ex and put on my "B_TCH BOOTS"

I have noticed it seems like Men are much tougher on what my ex did to me than women. Men have all said walk and do not look back while "some" women initially were supportive of any reconciliation attempts. (and we have no kids)

Just curious if this experience is unique to my set of circumstances.

posts: 72   ·   registered: Jul. 8th, 2013
id 6555339
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brkn_heartd ( member #30396) posted at 2:32 AM on Saturday, November 9th, 2013

saleschick,

I had a interesting support group when I was in the acute phase of H's A. I had a friend that D'ed after her H has an A, I had a friend that recounciled, I had a friend that had been an OW and a friend (male) that had had an A. The first three were all females. It was interesting to hear their views. Ultimately, my female friends were more about the feelings and emotions. My male friend equated it more to reptilian reflexes and in a male that demonstrated it, he was adamant that it would not change. He indicated it had nothing to do with emotions etc. That is when I realized that men and women approach A's differently.

This is not to mean that this characterization fits everyone. I know some females that did not worry about emotions and would drop their pants at the thought of any action. I know some males that are very involved with feelings and emotions and would be crushed if their spouse had a A and would never have an A themselves. I was just sharing attitudes from my 4 in the support group. In is an interesting topic.

Me-57 BS
Him 65-WS
Married 38 yrs, together 40
Affair Aug-Dec 09
official D-12/14/09
broke NC 1/31/10
second D 3/19/10

posts: 2137   ·   registered: Dec. 14th, 2010   ·   location: Northwesten US
id 6555430
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 Saleschick (original poster member #39772) posted at 5:17 AM on Saturday, November 9th, 2013

I have been amazed how many guys tell me their stories of being cheated on and none of them are still with that woman. They tell me to run as fast and as far away from my ex as I can get.

While I have some female friends that were cheated on some of them are still with their husbands.

posts: 72   ·   registered: Jul. 8th, 2013
id 6555543
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