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better4me ( member #30341) posted at 4:50 PM on Saturday, November 23rd, 2013
(((shellybeanz))) I understand. I've been there too.
DDay 11/17/2010 BW:58
Happily remarried!
Dawn58 ( member #37656) posted at 5:05 PM on Saturday, November 23rd, 2013
Oh Shellybeanz, I so hear you. I have never lived alone before (I am 55). There are times, I really enjoy the time for myself. Then there are other times, that I simply can't bear sitting in this house alone. It has been such a hard transition from going to living with someone and having someone sleeping next to me to sleeping next to the TV remote. Not the same thing.
You are not alone. Maybe all of us lonely girls can meet somewhere online and keep each other company on Friday nights!
I just trust, that right now, I am getting over the marriage and creating space for a healthy relationship. I too, get sad when I talk to woman that have been single for years after their divorce. I don't know what the future holds for me, I just know that I am a loving, caring woman. So, I am learning to love and cherish myself, love and cherish the friends and family in my life. And when I am feeling lonely, be extra gentle with myself. Take a hot bath, treat myself to a little something or call a girlfriend.
I still believe in love.
I got into the marriage, because I loved him. I got out of the marriage, because I love me.
newlysingle ( member #38735) posted at 6:15 AM on Monday, November 25th, 2013
I'm with SBB. I was so lonely in my marriage, that life isn't much different now. The Gnat traveled most if the time and when he was home, he was checked out. I have those lonely nights too. I totally get it. I joined a single parenting group through meetup and they've been great when I'm facing I've of those nights with the kids. There is usually some kind of kid-friendly activity going on.
I just have to hope that we eventually all find someone special who is worthy of our love and companionship.
BW - Me (40)
XWH -The Gnat
"Engaged" to OW, but the wedding appears to be indefinitely postponed.
M for 8 years, together for 10
1 DD (8), 1 DS (3)
Dday 3/13
Happily Divorced 9/20/13
fraeuken ( member #30742) posted at 6:25 AM on Monday, November 25th, 2013
I have to second that I was very lonely in my marriage too. Having a warm body next to me in bed did not really mean having true company.
I am still getting used to being alone. It is not always easy and I too understand your feelings about wanting companionship. The one thing I liked most about dating xso was to know there was somebody waiting for me to spend time with him.
It is very tough with a young child as this ties you down. Sending hugs!
Temporarily independent with the whole world at my feet.
lifestoshort ( member #18442) posted at 4:25 AM on Saturday, November 30th, 2013
i miss having someone to tell what my kids did or what was funny so we can laugh together about it. now, its just me. I feel like I talk to myself in my head all the dang time. that sucks.
I dont so much care that its Friday or weekend or whatever, I rarely get alone time now anyway so Friday I love to be at home reading or watching a movie.
i just miss overall having company. I dont miss dating, or flirting or awkward conversations. I just miss being content and feeling safe. I miss sex.
I suppose this all takes time.
Im 45. 1st H I left in 2001 after 3 kids. narcassist.
2nd exH had MANY affairs.FALSE R. cheats again. D 5/09. 2 kids. I got 100% custody. ex hasnt seen kids in 6 yrs.
2014 to now: dated highschool sweetheart. He cheated w 23 yr old & left.
Harriet ( member #34543) posted at 9:02 AM on Saturday, November 30th, 2013
I feel the lonliness, too. And I would like to believe their will be love in my future, but who really knows? I know too many women who have been single for years to think that couldn't happen to me as well. My sister has been single for years and now I see how she fills up her days, way in advnace, and I am starting to realize that it's to ward off lonliness. I used to love being alone. I used to daydream about life without my ex and the freedom I would have to do whatever I wanted. I didn't expect the empty feeling.
D-Day Spring 2008
3 years false R
Divorce Final 6/7/12
Griefstricken25 ( member #29183) posted at 1:33 AM on Sunday, December 1st, 2013
It's hard, and I feel your pain. I'm alone with 3 kids and I sometimes crave another adult to come home to me SO badly.
It will help as your daughter gets older. She's so little right now. As she gets older, you can incorporate family movie night, and family game night, and go out and DO more stuff with her, on those lonelier evenings.
It will get better, even IF there is not a man involved.
Me!
3 amazing kidlets
To WXH "Now you're just somebody that I used to know." http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d9NF2edxy-M
D-day and separation - June, 2009
Divorced - December, 2011
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