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roarlouder (original poster member #40921) posted at 4:54 PM on Thursday, February 20th, 2014
Today is supposed to be the day I am supposed to sign all the final paperwork...then we just have to wait 8 weeks for a divorce certificate. I may have just jinxed the delivery by writing this.
I've had to cancel signing a few times due to delays from his lawyer, but I think today is it. I have mixed emotions. There will be relief, I feel like I can finally tell people. But I am so sad and mad too. There are so many things I want to say to him, but I know there's no point.
He's spent the last few weeks trying to "woo" me, but doesn't seem to understand, or be capable of giving me, the one thing that may make me pause and reconsider: proof he's actually capable of being/doing different. Real remorse, real no-holding-back truth about everything.
I have to make arrangements with him once the documents arrive to get a few things from the house. I so badly want to tell him how I feel, but I know there's no point. All I will get is "then come home, we'll be happy". His perception of a healthy relationship is so skewed...
My heart is broken...but I am determined to be strong. This is what I need to do, he's given me no choice. He's cheated our entire relationship, carried on a LTA whine we dated, right through our wedding and continued to once I gave him a second chance....
DDay-sept 2013
1LTA(5yrs) plus many ONS
Divorcing.
No kids
BAB61 ( member #41181) posted at 5:03 PM on Thursday, February 20th, 2014
He's a cake-eater! Don't let him undermine you! Keep your eyes on the goal, freedom from the pain of his betrayals.
((((roarlouder))))
Boss A** B*tch
BS/52 Me, STBXpos/56, dd's 16&14
1st D-day 10/19/2013 EA/PA
2nd D-day 12/7/2013 LTA/Rendezvous
S 12/7/2013 No-fault state, 6 mo S, counting down the days.
norabird ( member #42092) posted at 5:25 PM on Thursday, February 20th, 2014
I will be thinking of you today. It's so hard. But this is a step to freedom. You can mourn the relationship still while knowing he can't offer what you need.
Nature_Girl ( member #32554) posted at 6:34 PM on Thursday, February 20th, 2014
You're going to be able to walk through the gate into a new life. ((((HUGS))))
Me = BS
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - DIVORCED!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJgjyDFfJuU
roarlouder (original poster member #40921) posted at 8:27 PM on Thursday, February 20th, 2014
Lawyer just confirmed. Leaving for his office in 15 minutes.
I have never felt anything comparable to this. It's a death, mixed with deceit and betrayal...tempered with something still resembling love and disbelief...
DDay-sept 2013
1LTA(5yrs) plus many ONS
Divorcing.
No kids
HurtsButImOK ( member #38865) posted at 9:10 PM on Thursday, February 20th, 2014
Strength roarlouder. You can do this.
He has shown you who he really is, believe him. You deserve better.
Me: Awesome - 35.... ummm, not anymore
"I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel". –Maya Angelou
nowiknow23 ( member #33226) posted at 9:42 PM on Thursday, February 20th, 2014
((((roar)))) Sending you strength, honey.
You can call me NIK
And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane
myowndystopia ( member #41340) posted at 10:04 PM on Thursday, February 20th, 2014
(((Roar louder))) hope it has all gone ok. Sending you strength.
Me- BS
Him - WS (the Grub)
married 28 years/4 kids(mostly grown)
"'Cause there's a side to you that I never knew, never knew.
All the things you'd say, they were never true, never true "
Set Fire to the Rain
Adele
roarlouder (original poster member #40921) posted at 11:30 PM on Thursday, February 20th, 2014
Thank you for your support. Signed everything. Just have to wait about 8 weeks for it to be official. No surprises from his or his lawyer, which I thought there might be.
DDay-sept 2013
1LTA(5yrs) plus many ONS
Divorcing.
No kids
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