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I am curious as to why you have to formally evict him if this house was yours to begin with..

If it is a lease without option to buy when does your renewal come up?

If indeed the house is a rental or lease and the renewal comes up in less than 90 days, maybe it would be better if you could leave and let him be stranded there without electricity, food, running water, etc..

[This message edited by doggiediva at 10:24 AM, April 17th (Thursday)]

You need to contact an attorney immediately. Today. Go through Legal Aid if you must, but find out your legal rights.

In the mean time, assuming you can't kick him out today, I think you should change his circumstances there in your home right away. Raise his rent. Put his belongings in the basement or garage. Make him sleep on the couch or floor in the laundry room. Do you get what I'm saying? He doesn't get to live in comfort in your home anymore. He no longer has access to the kitchen. Lock everything down with padlocks if you have to. Make his life a living hell. Considering that he was going to dump you, I should think you'd find a great sense of healing in doing this. I would go so far as to turn the water off to the showers/tubs so that he has to go to the gym or YMCA to get clean.

Put a deadbolt on your bedroom and put everything you value in there. Move your furniture in there. Put the TV, computer & phones in there. Shut him out of every possible modern convenience.

You all are amazing! Thank you so much. I already had him living out of boxes and sleeping on the couch. When I get home from work I am going to take all the food he likes out of the house and replace it with stuff he wont eat. I have to feed the kids, so I was still cooking and he was still eating. I am also going to disconnect the cable from the living. I didnt think to do any of these things.

He cant live with the OW for a couple of reasons. 1. He won't have a car because he drives one of mine and I won't let him take it. 2. She and her two 20 something age children are all out of work and homeless. They sleep in a shelter at night and walk the streets by day.

That's part of the reason I dont understand his thinking. He is leaving a stable home, access to a car and All of us work (including my kids.) It makes no sense.

I have an appt with a lawyer for tomorrow to find out about starting the eviction process. I am mostly ok while I'm at work. But soon I will be heading home for the night and thats when I can't control my emotions.

It makes no sense.

You are right. It doesn't. It never will, either. You can't make sense out of nonsense, and that's what his thought and actions are.

This guy sounds like a parasite and you are going to have a far better life with him gone. Right now, the pain may be overwhelming--but better times are ahead.

Ask the lawyer about all of this. Can you change the locks and not give him a key. If so, do that and then move somewhere for a week and then move back. If not, move somewhere else (where he won't know where you are) while the eviction process starts and then have the electricity, phone and water turned off, until further notice by you.