SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

You may not be able to afford an attorney at the present, but that shouldn't stop you from doing research on your own as to whether is is legal in your state for her to flee with the kids..

My guess is that if she fled with the kids before you filed for divorce or separation, it would be legal...No kidnapping involved..She would have to be gone for a long time before you could file for D and be granted the D based on abandonment..A D automatically granted under abandonment shouldn't be as lengthy or expensive as a contested D..Can you get a cash advance or a loan on an emergency basis to get legal help if needed?

In our state parental kidnapping is taken seriously with Amber Alerts and such...

So it is wise to be protected legally and protect your kids...One has to wonder how long it will take for your WW to come to her senses...

[This message edited by doggiediva at 9:41 AM, May 2nd (Friday)]

easy, Tn is absolutely correct. I got to focus on the marriage and its repair an overlooked that.

it is absolutely imperative that you seek a lawyer like yesterday. her comment about the children is absolutely bone chilling. you need an opinion from him as to whether she can actually just up and leave with the kids.

if she has already thought about doing that, she's a lot farther down the road to leaving you than you think. get proactive. protect yourself and the children.

my advice would be to file for divorce and ask for custody. it can always be withdrawn.

easy, are there any parents or siblings you could borrow the money from?

yeah, its that serious!

easy, are there any parents or siblings you could borrow the money from?

I was just going to ask the same thing? Or relatives?

And yes, you have actually been threatened by your wife and in some way the OM.

Can you afford any kind of background check on this guy. Some of those can be as cheap as $15. Companies use them all of the time for employment.

Do you even know if this guy works?

Have you told her parents any of this?

I have done a background check on instantcheckmate.com. I was hoping it came back with a bad criminal record but it was clean. I so know he smokes weed. He has a picture of his bong posted on his Google+ page. He also left a comment about having the "wacky tabackey" I do not want my kids exposed to this. I may be gullible in this fact considering it is everywhere now but I was raised that drugs are wrong. I know people do not consider this a drug but I so. I am proud to say I have never done any drugs other than alcohol of course. I also sent an e-mail for anxinailt through massfamilylawgroup.com. I really cannot believe it has gone this bad this fast after 17 years of a really happy marriage.

get copies of those posts asap. put them in a spot your wife has no access to.