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kellyAnn65 (original poster new member #44211) posted at 11:21 PM on Wednesday, July 30th, 2014
My husband is acting so strange...If you were in my house this past week you would think we have the most wonderful marriage. He is hugging me kissing me and wants to have sex like everyday??? The problem is she is still in the picture he emails her every morning and calls her everyday..I just don't know what to think.He says he loves me and IS in love with me.. I am afraid if I do not sleep with him he WILL run to her...I am so confused 
yearsofpain25 ( member #42012) posted at 12:45 AM on Thursday, July 31st, 2014
Your WH is the worst kind of cake eater! He knows there is nothing you can do due to your cancer and needing his insurance. I read through your other thread to see what was going on.
Sounds like he has already run to the OW. "Needs a girlfriend". Please. IMHO what he is doing to you is mental and emotional abuse. Don't let that asshat sleep with you.
Surely there is something you can do about getting insurance for your cancer treatments other than getting it from him. Have you thought about leaving him or have you explored any other avenues.
I'm so very sorry kellyAnn65. Have you explored any option about getting out of your situation?
yop
[This message edited by yearsofpain25 at 7:20 PM, July 30th (Wednesday)]
"I remind myself of this. I am a survivor. I have taken all this world has dished out and am still here. So there is no reason to be afraid. Whatever happens, I will survive. So now onto living. It is time for me to thrive." - DrJekyll
jjct ( member #17484) posted at 1:03 AM on Thursday, July 31st, 2014
yop is correct.
((((kelly)))
Sending strength.
nekorb ( member #40306) posted at 1:07 AM on Thursday, July 31st, 2014
Do NOT have sex with this man. Even if it means he runs to OW. Let him go, honey. You will not stoop to the level of trading sex for *anything*. Do you hear me?
Have you consulted an atty? Once I filed for D, my WH was not able to drop me from his insurance (not that I think he would have).
Get to an atty. I don't know your backstory, but I'm sorry to hear about the health concerns it sounds like you have.
It's going to be ok.
(((Kelly)))
ETA: I think I put my mom voice on there for a minute. Sorry. What I meant to say was: I don't recommend you stoop to the level of trading sex for anything. It will set a precedent that will be hard to break going forward and will keep you trapped and immobilized in the relationship.
[This message edited by nekorb at 8:18 AM, July 31st (Thursday)]
Me: BS 44; Him: WH 47 M - 22 Years
D-day: 7/2013; D filed 7/2014; Divorced 7-27-16
...the WS affair starts off in a dreamland where everything is all Golly, Wow! and Meant To Be! and Soul Mates drop from the trees to frolic in the mist. -devotedman
RidingHealingRd ( member #33867) posted at 5:13 AM on Thursday, July 31st, 2014
I am afraid if I do not sleep with him he WILL run to her
^^^It appears that he is already doing that.
Not only should you not sleep with him, you should not allow him to live with you. If he is unwilling to end his A I would tell him to leave.
It is amazing how a WS can do an about face when they sense that there are true consequences for their behavior. I believe that he knows what he can get away with. You deserve better, expect it, insist on it.
I too would advise that you at least consult with an attorney to understand your rights.
((KellyAnn65))
ME: 60 BS
HIM: 67 WH
Married: 35 years
D'Day: 10/29/10
in R 10 years and it's working but he is putting 200% into it (as he should) to make it right again.
The truth hurts, but I have never seen it cause the pain that lies do.
cantgetup ( member #36146) posted at 12:03 PM on Thursday, July 31st, 2014
The problem is that the affection he is showing you and and sex he wants from you are not authentic. These are self-serving gestures so he can get what he wants. And it's
Working. He's manipulating you and obviously successfully so since you seem to think these are loving gestures from a loving spouse. They aren't. What a disgusting pig to be doing this to you with the health issues you are facing. That takes a special kinds of evil. Kick him out and file. From what I've read stress is not good for cancer patients. Take care of you and forget about him.
nekorb ( member #40306) posted at 10:26 PM on Friday, August 1st, 2014
Me: BS 44; Him: WH 47 M - 22 Years
D-day: 7/2013; D filed 7/2014; Divorced 7-27-16
...the WS affair starts off in a dreamland where everything is all Golly, Wow! and Meant To Be! and Soul Mates drop from the trees to frolic in the mist. -devotedman
stuckforever ( new member #39908) posted at 10:44 PM on Friday, August 1st, 2014
I finally figured my WH out. He will get all happy and lovey dovey and that is my signal that he has talked to or seen the OW. I know that sounds backwards but its true. He will be in an awful mood and a little while later he turns all nice and stuff (usually after he's been in the bathroom or out to smoke at the side of the house where I can't see him).
Makes me ill. I'm still biding my time....
[This message edited by stuckforever at 4:46 PM, August 1st (Friday)]
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