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I'm ready to start the new chapter in my life moving forward without a cheating lying manipulate unremorseful woman Holding me down

Wow, hotrod. Her head is so far up her ass she makes a human donut. Sorry you had to go through all that drama but glad to hear that your path forward is clear. Boy, is she ever going to regret her decision...but some lucky lady in your future will be glad she made it.

[This message edited by Jduff at 12:56 PM, April 11th (Saturday)]

What I heard what her wife told you was, "Me, me, me, me, give me money, me, me, me, victim, poor me, me, me, ME, stay friends with me, pay for my phone, me, me, me, I deserve for you to pay me, me, me, if I'm not getting you to pay then f you, me, me, me."

I think the whole meeting was for her to make sure you "stayed friends" so to manipulate you into paying for her stuff while she still cheated on you.

When she told you "I was on the fence, thinking of R until you blocked off OMs number, turned off my phone, closed our bank account, changed the locks" what she was hoping was that you would say "oh I'm so sorry I will do everything back to the way it was please give me another chance."

Sadly, I think the large majority of cheating wives don't think their husbands like "he's got to stay with me, no other woman would ever want that poor sad sack." That's how much most of them devalue their husbands and how valued they feel about themselves, like the world is their oyster.

How I see about your particular situation is that you are in a pain of world for a very short time, and very soon you will be better. It is much, much, much, much better that you've gone through this extreme but short-term pain NOW because if not, if you had stayed with her and gotten kids and more entangled lives, you would wind up with a pain that will last the rest of your lives. In other words, I think you are lucky that you found out about her now, rather than later.

Hey Hotrod,

How‘s it going?

Your WW reactions are typical.

Like all decisions they really aren’t final either… She’s posturing, issuing threats… You two still have a way to go before true and real commitment to a single path is made.

SerJr made a train-trip comparison. Let’s stick to it: You told your wife that you NEEDED to make that trip. You made it clear that she was welcome to come along but that she needed to board the train. She’s just told you that she had EVERY INTENTION of making the trip until she discovered you were riding coach and not first-class… Therefore she hasn’t bought a ticket, hasn’t packed a suitcase and is waving good-bye at the platform.

Right now you are boarding the train, you are stuffing your bag into the luggage rack, you are finding a seat, selecting your music to listen to, opening your book to read, making sure you brought some snacks and waiting for the train to pull out. You might even look out the window and see her standing on the platform. You might even see her walk to the exit. The ONLY THING that’s certain is that YOU are on the train setting off on the journey.

To bring this back to real-life: Your WW basically forwarded her resignation as your wife. All that’s left is to formally complete that process. Believe it or not you guys aren’t the first couple to divorce… There is a process, laws and procedures that will handle this and ensure you both get as fair a deal out of this as possible.

This process takes time. It gathers momentum – just like the train. And just like the train then your wife CAN jump on board until and unless the momentum is too great. Right now you might fell like sh@t but as the process goes on YOUR willingness to take her back will diminish.

So I strongly suggest you stick to your guns. Start the process of terminating the marriage. It’s not got anything to do with winning or with revenge – it’s simply the process of creating a situation inductive to recovery. IF your wife wants to reconcile… well… at that time and that point it’s totally your call. If she doesn’t… well… at least you are well on your way out of infidelity.

Hotrod

I was thinking of you s well.

Hope your anger has simmered and now you use that energy to file D and get that selfish brat out of your life.

Stay positive and drama free.

HM