SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

I'm a lot more selfish. It really stands out and my family has even called me out on it. Every interaction or friendship, I'm super paranoid about someone taking advantage of my good will.

Need to work on these aspects really. Not a positive change.

Here’s some perspective from someone 6-years out from DD, divorced and remarried with a baby on the way.

I don’t trust human beings. We’re all just too flawed.

Love is a fleeting beautiful thing-while it lasts. Just enjoy it while it lasts and try not to spend too much time wondering, questioning how long it will last. True love? You won’t know it till your buried next to that person. So, I seem continuously braced for disappointment.

I still love very tenderly. I love like it’s true.

I don’t tolerate BS either. I call it right out.

I live for the day and don’t think much about the future-which isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Living in the moment rather than busting your ass for some uncertain future.

My career has suffered. However, with baby on the way, I have purpose again. It’s amazing how resilient we are.

I don’t trust beautiful women. My new wife is beautiful. She doesn’t trust me either. She too was cheated on. Our mutual lack of trust for each other actually reaffirms that we still fear losing each other. I think when we start trusting each other, it maybe a red flag that we’re no longer worried about losing each other? (This is so messed up. So messed up that we laugh about it).

I have a twisted sense of humor now. I’ve learned to laugh at human foley. Laugh at myself and how our crazy minds work.

Boundaries. I expect firm boundaries now. So does she.

I’m more emotional now. Tear up for chick flicks. It’s embarrassing. I guess life just got real and I empathize with everything now-which is a good thing.

I can spot cheaters, and future cheaters with extreme accuracy and inaccuracy.

I sadistically miss the adrenaline rush of DD...

Just let that soak in a moment.

THIS, is interesting. This concerns me the most. This is the very essence of PTSD. This can wreck future relationships if not recognized, faced and managed.

[This message edited by RealityBlows at 12:37 AM, July 11th (Thursday)]

How have you changed? What have people said to you or observed?

My loved ones are concerned about how long it is taking me to heal from this betrayal. My first husband also cheated on me.

I no longer have the capacity to trust people. I have a damaged self image. I feel perpetually brokenhearted and lonesome. After 15 months, I still cannot shake it. I am afraid all the time. I cannot bear to be alone.