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General :
Have you seen sexts??

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EAPTSD ( member #62859) posted at 5:54 PM on Thursday, October 31st, 2019

That seems so lame. That's what he jeopardized 15 years for?

Have you seen the sexts between your WS and AP?

My WW broke no contact to just say that she missed her AP and how weird it was not to be talking to him. Nothing sexual, but it was worth blowing up two marriages to her. She also said he was often distant and condescending. Just because she understood that he was an asshole didn’t seem to change the fact that she desperately craved his attention.

“They always cheat down” is a cliche for a reason, it only makes sense inside the fantasy. Of course it sounds stupid and juvenile now. If your WH doesn’t own his reality inside the affair fog, he is minimizing. Even if her responses were lame, he can admit that he was disappointed in her and was excited about sending the pics.

Me: BS 33
WS : 35

DDay : 10/01/2016

posts: 55   ·   registered: Feb. 27th, 2018   ·   location: CO
id 8460886
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SumofOne ( member #70948) posted at 6:08 PM on Thursday, October 31st, 2019

Lord I know what this and other replies are going to send your mind to but my wife and her AP's said things such as:

You make me so hard

You make me so wet

I want to taste you

I want you to cum in my mouth and I will swallow every drop

I'd love to hit that from behind

I wish I could ride that big d right now

Details of how hard they came masturbating etc etc.

Think of every raunchy thing and it was probably said.

I just don't know how many times you can say I am hard for you or you make me so wet that it starts to lose meaning but it would take me all of 1 day to tire of such conversations.

The person you would take a bullet for is behind the trigger.

posts: 249   ·   registered: Jul. 6th, 2019
id 8460898
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 layla1234 (original poster member #68851) posted at 6:23 PM on Thursday, October 31st, 2019

Sumofone,

Gross. If I believe everything he says (I'm constantly back and forth). The pic sending had just started so I don't think they got to cum tasting. I do know my WH said he would "finish inside her" in one role playing convo. He said she said she would take his dick and put it in her mouth. Sounds hot right?

Married: 5-15-11
3 kids: ages 6, 3, and baby born in Sept.
D-day of EA with married COW:7-18-18

So much missing info from my story. I'm too exhausted to add it all. Divorce process started.

posts: 856   ·   registered: Nov. 15th, 2018
id 8460911
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SumofOne ( member #70948) posted at 6:44 PM on Thursday, October 31st, 2019

Sounds hot right?

Layla if you don't mind could you use a sexier font from now on. Nothing is hotter than Arial Bold.

I get how it can be erotic to talk/text like that but seriously, at some point wouldn't it just be words on a page?

The person you would take a bullet for is behind the trigger.

posts: 249   ·   registered: Jul. 6th, 2019
id 8460924
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 layla1234 (original poster member #68851) posted at 6:52 PM on Thursday, October 31st, 2019

I'm guessing that's the point where it usually crosses over into physical. The texting becomes not enough. I just hope one day I feel confident that it never went there.

Married: 5-15-11
3 kids: ages 6, 3, and baby born in Sept.
D-day of EA with married COW:7-18-18

So much missing info from my story. I'm too exhausted to add it all. Divorce process started.

posts: 856   ·   registered: Nov. 15th, 2018
id 8460931
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 layla1234 (original poster member #68851) posted at 7:56 PM on Thursday, October 31st, 2019

I can't find the post, but someone mentioned finding a hidden folder on a phone with pictures. Anyone know how that works? I have an android.

Married: 5-15-11
3 kids: ages 6, 3, and baby born in Sept.
D-day of EA with married COW:7-18-18

So much missing info from my story. I'm too exhausted to add it all. Divorce process started.

posts: 856   ·   registered: Nov. 15th, 2018
id 8460955
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ThisIsSoLonely ( Guide #64418) posted at 8:04 PM on Thursday, October 31st, 2019

I have not read them (could - I have them all on a zip drive) but my WH said that "I would be disgusted and likely throw up." He also said something similar to this:

I get how it can be erotic to talk/text like that but seriously, at some point wouldn't it just be words on a page?

I think his words were, it got boring and he was "less and less into it over time" but it was raunchy, porn-style texting and masturbating a lot in the car apparently mostly to her talking but sometimes via text (how do you hold the phone and type is beyond me while masturbating).

You are the only person you are guaranteed to spend the rest of your life with. Act accordingly.

Constantly editing posts: usually due to sticky keys on my laptop or additional thoughts

posts: 2519   ·   registered: Jul. 11th, 2018
id 8460957
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Zamboni ( member #65496) posted at 8:34 PM on Thursday, October 31st, 2019

Welll, my STBXWH must have started to run out of clever dick comments, because I did see him use the eggplant emoji as well.

Nothing says love, commitment, and respect like “🍆💦”

Me: BW
Him: WH Serial Cheater / NPD
Multiple affairs
Almost Divorced

posts: 864   ·   registered: Jul. 18th, 2018
id 8460978
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sickoftears ( member #59287) posted at 9:37 PM on Thursday, October 31st, 2019

Yes I saw them and it still makes me embarrassed for him. They were really juvenile and raunchy. Like 2 nearly 40 year olds reverted back to age 13 and had just learned naughty words. Laughable really. "I'm going to stick my dick so far up your ass it's going to come out of your mouth". Lol. I lost even more respect for him after I read some of those and it really hit home what a child I had been making a life with for the last 20 years.

It did help me learn about the nature of their relationship. There was never any lovey dovey stuff. He used her for sex. He was actually rude to her at times. He treated her like the desperate for attention whore she was.

I wish to add that after this, there are certain things that I will NEVER do with him and sexting is one. Car sex is another.

[This message edited by sickoftears at 4:24 PM, October 31st (Thursday)]

posts: 54   ·   registered: Jun. 20th, 2017
id 8461017
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hcsv ( member #51813) posted at 10:07 PM on Thursday, October 31st, 2019

I saw much more than the one the ex knows about. As mentioned previously, I was embarrassed for him. It was juvenile with so many emojis.

After 40 years, ex turned into someone I didnt know and couldnt trust anymore. Divorced. 1/17

posts: 774   ·   registered: Feb. 14th, 2016
id 8461030
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crazyblindsided ( member #35215) posted at 10:19 PM on Thursday, October 31st, 2019

My WH says she wasn't good at sexting.

Mine told me she texted him what he wanted to hear I never texted him like that again.

I saw most of the texts/sexts. I recovered a lot through the iPhone backup files burried in the code.

fBS/fWS(me):52 Mad-hattered after DD (2008)
XWS:55 Serial Cheater, Diagnosed NPD
DD(22) DS(19)
XWS cheated the entire M spanning 19 years
Discovered D-Days 2006,2008,2012, False R 2014
Separated 9/2019; Divorced 8/2024

posts: 9074   ·   registered: Apr. 2nd, 2012   ·   location: California
id 8461035
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Questioningall ( member #43959) posted at 10:27 PM on Thursday, October 31st, 2019

I saw some, not all, and they were hard to read. The worst was when he described sex with me and how I felt and substituted her for me in the scene. Though 5 years later, I think about it and wonder how she’d have reacted if he had said, “This is how my wife likes it and I think you’ll like it, too.”

Me-BS 57
Him-WS 57 Sorrowfulmate
Married 30 years, 5 kids
Dday #1 12/12 He made up a ONS
Dday #2. 3/14 EAs, 3 ONS, 2 LTA

Buttercup: We'll never survive.
Westley: Nonsense. You're only saying that because no one ever has.

posts: 594   ·   registered: Jul. 2nd, 2014
id 8461038
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SumofOne ( member #70948) posted at 3:49 PM on Friday, November 1st, 2019

Sickoftears, you should end every text you send to him with this line.

"I'm going to stick my dick so far up your ass it's going to come out of your mouth"

I love that. I might send it to my WW just for fun. The fact that she is not into anal would make it even more fun.

A bit off topic but one thing that burns me up and I do think men have to deal with this more is that my WW doesn't think these guys share her pics with their buddies. "I don't think he would do that". Some wouldn't but most do. They have no respect for her. She's a married woman sending them nudes. She also was blessed with an amazing figure...of course they are going to show or send to their friends.

The person you would take a bullet for is behind the trigger.

posts: 249   ·   registered: Jul. 6th, 2019
id 8461331
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sickoftears ( member #59287) posted at 4:19 PM on Friday, November 1st, 2019

Sumofone, that is exactly the way my mind works and I would love to do just that. The amount of smart ass comments that I keep to myself is unreal.

And I believe that you are correct about the lack of respect and discretion a man has for a woman that is a side chick and/or is a cheater. When I told my husband how shocked I was to read how he spoke to her because I had never heard him say things like that before, he looked at me like I had just grew another head and said "I wouldn't talk to you like that".

But I won't exactly argue that he treated me with respect either🙄, just not disrespectful in the same ways.

posts: 54   ·   registered: Jun. 20th, 2017
id 8461347
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Happenedtome2 ( member #68906) posted at 4:36 PM on Friday, November 1st, 2019

I saw the sexts. I was pretty lit up when I did too and couldn't believe my eyes. They would make a porn star blush.

I blew up before getting the chance to forward them, but did forward an email to myself that was a conversation about him pissing himself. She replied that she wasn't into it which made me laugh because of some of the other things that they were saying.

BH DDay August 2018 :https://www.survivinginfidelity.com/forums.asp?tid=633451

posts: 510   ·   registered: Nov. 23rd, 2018
id 8461368
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SadieMae ( member #42986) posted at 4:58 PM on Friday, November 1st, 2019

I've seen the sexts. It wasn't easy to read and I lost a lot of respect for him in reading the juvenile and disgusting things he wrote.

What hurt the most was reading him telling her that he imagined I was her when we were intimate.

He claimed later that he never did it, only told her he did. Whatever, right?

[This message edited by SadieMae at 10:59 AM, November 1st, 2019 (Friday)]

Me: BW D-day 3/9/2014
TT until 6/2016
TT again Fall 2020
Yay! A new D-Day on 11/8/2023 WTAF

posts: 1477   ·   registered: Apr. 3rd, 2014   ·   location: Sweet Tea in the Shade
id 8461384
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20yrsagoBS ( member #55272) posted at 5:06 PM on Friday, November 1st, 2019

No,

Per conversation with his AP, he used the same corny (lame) sayings with them that he used on me

My eyes just rolled so hard!

Obviously they didn’t need to put forth much effort to make it worthwhile.

Ick

[This message edited by 20yrsagoBS at 11:08 AM, November 1st (Friday)]

BW, 54 WH 53 When you lie down with dogs, you wake up with fleas

posts: 2199   ·   registered: Sep. 21st, 2016   ·   location: Tampa Bay Area, Florida
id 8461390
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20yrsagoBS ( member #55272) posted at 5:10 PM on Friday, November 1st, 2019

Meant to be together, never felt love like this, your my everything, I want to run away with you..

Eew how romantic coming from a cheater to a hole.

BW, 54 WH 53 When you lie down with dogs, you wake up with fleas

posts: 2199   ·   registered: Sep. 21st, 2016   ·   location: Tampa Bay Area, Florida
id 8461393
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Skatz1973 ( new member #71989) posted at 9:33 PM on Friday, November 1st, 2019

I found the burner phone and saw "send me sexy pics" (right after we had sex that morning) I was going to throw a load of laundry in, it was in his pants pocket, we ended up wrestling over it, very physical, I bit him so hard he bled. He broke it right then. Wish I could find them. The OW said she deleted all of hers. All I got to see was his initial "are extramarital affairs off limits for you LOL"she replied "well, I've haven't been with a married guy and find you attractive" he replied "well I think you're pretty as well :) is it the day time thing or the married guy thing that makes you would be awkward for the first time ever lol". He tried to tell me that he was the one that pursued her. Didn't look like it was that hard. She answered right away.

[This message edited by Skatz1973 at 3:34 PM, November 1st (Friday)]

BW
WH 1 year PA
D Day 3/24/2019
In R
M 13Y (at DDay)

posts: 2   ·   registered: Nov. 1st, 2019   ·   location: Wisconsin
id 8461528
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crazyblindsided ( member #35215) posted at 10:20 PM on Friday, November 1st, 2019

Dumbest sext I saw on STBX's phone:

'Do you still have any swimmers left' in reference to his sperm like were they planning on having a baby

Omfg sounds damn sexy to me

fBS/fWS(me):52 Mad-hattered after DD (2008)
XWS:55 Serial Cheater, Diagnosed NPD
DD(22) DS(19)
XWS cheated the entire M spanning 19 years
Discovered D-Days 2006,2008,2012, False R 2014
Separated 9/2019; Divorced 8/2024

posts: 9074   ·   registered: Apr. 2nd, 2012   ·   location: California
id 8461553
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