SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

My wife's A's started after DD was born, like right after.

But I took care of the child all day and she had trouble bonding w the child so that confuses me.

Hormones can go wonky. And not everyone follows the more common patterns. I feel for you because not only did your family’s world get turned upside down but you’re having to play a double parental role.

You gave me some food for thought. Right after our daughter was born my STBX started going out with co-workers and staying out late. My daughter was colicky and I was averaging about 3 hours of sleep a day. My STBX reminded me of a rebellious teenager and I was completely turned off. It just spiraled from there.

Some of them actually start to resent their own kids for getting attention from the woman they see as theirs and theirs only.

My other theory is some of them change their view of their wife as sexual partner/wife to a more motherly role. And I think that might be at the root of some cases of wandering, wanting someone to fill the sexy partner role once they shift how they view their wife.

Hormones can go wonky. And not everyone follows the more common patterns. I feel for you because not only did your family’s world get turned upside down but you’re having to play a double parental role.

Well, I was. But I left the stbxw. And I'm unfortunately used to that. I played a parental role to both of my actual parents starting at the age of 18.

And that is why I was so suceptable to being suckered into doing it again for my stbxw.

But I am so fucking tired of doing this over and over again. I will not rest until the only person I parent in this world is my daughter and nobody else.

I'm not there yet. Still parenting my mom and little brother. But making strides.

[This message edited by Idiotmcstupid at 1:29 AM, August 16th, 2020 (Sunday)]

Well, I was. But I left the stbxw. And I'm unfortunately used to that. I played a parental role to both of my actual parents starting at the age of 18.

And that is why I was so suceptable to being suckered into doing it again for my stbxw.

But I am so fucking tired of doing this over and over again. I will not rest until the only person I parent in this world is my daughter and nobody else.

I'm not there yet. Still parenting my mom and little brother. But making strides.

Hey, wanna co-author a book with me? My parents and in-laws and a few aunts are all gone now but my grandkids were born just in time to fill my “parenting” thing. Also had 5 dogs, 3 cats. My strides have simple baby steps. But I have 4 friends in my neighborhood, ages 89-95.

I think I’m hopeless

I hope I'm not hopeless... But it's hard to say.

I'll never parent a spouse again though, I'm entirely over it.

I'll never parent a spouse again though, I'm entirely over it.

Amen!

I refuse to play the mommy role ever again. I've got enough to deal with, handle your own shit, I'll handle mine. We'll come together when we need to, on joint matters, but there are a hell of a lot more things in life that are a You problem, not a Me or Us problem.

Never again will I go hunting for someone else's car keys every goddamn morning because somebody can't be bothered to put them away when they get home.