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Newest Member: 10yearson

Reconciliation :
Random wrong numbers

Topic is Sleeping.

BreakingBad ( member #75779) posted at 8:42 PM on Sunday, October 30th, 2022

Awesome action on your part.

It may be that she really does believe this is her father's number then and that she truly forgets it isn't. If so, then I really feel for her.

I was skeptical that these places were still open when she calls, but it seems like they are and it also answers my skepticism about why they would let her use their phone. If she seems lost/confused and isn't leaving but now wants to call for a ride home, that would definitely be a scenario where a worker might agree to allow use of the phone. It's awkward (and might feel mean spirited) to just usher out a customer who seems to have no where else to go out the door late at night and then just lock up.

"...lately it's not hurtin' like it did before. Maybe I am learning how to love me more."[Credit to Sam Smith]

Me=BW; fWH=online affairs with 3 APs over 3+ yrs.Both in IC & MC.Married 32 yrs now 2 kids-both in HS.Attempting R

posts: 358   ·   registered: Oct. 31st, 2020
id 8762902

leafields ( Guide #63517) posted at 8:50 PM on Sunday, October 30th, 2022

This is almost like a mini-mystery. I hope you find out who it is so you can get her to stop.

BW M 34years, Dday 1: March 2018, Dday 2: August 2019, D final 2/25/21

posts: 1894   ·   registered: Apr. 21st, 2018   ·   location: Washington State
id 8762903

Ariopolis ( member #75786) posted at 10:39 PM on Sunday, October 30th, 2022

Wrong idea. I thought it was a spoofed #.

[This message edited by Ariopolis at 4:41 PM, October 30th (Sunday)]

[This message edited by Ariopolis at 10:41 PM, Sunday, October 30th]

posts: 264   ·   registered: Nov. 2nd, 2020
id 8762917

Bigger ( Attaché #8354) posted at 12:22 AM on Monday, October 31st, 2022

Quite a few years ago – like 25 or so – my wife and I would get random calls all time of the day from someone asking for Erick. No Erick in the Bigger household. Clearly an older man and probably drunk. This had been going on with brief interludes for nearly a year, and this is pre caller-id and all this modern stuff. I once got the guy chatting and managed to pick out that this guy was a fisherman and from a small town about one hours drive from where we live. Still didn’t have a name though.
I called the police in that small town and told them what I knew – older man, drank a lot, probably a fisherman and was always looking for Erick. The small-town officer told me he had one man in mind as a likely suspect (all towns have their friendly drunks…) and asked me not to hang up next time I got a call. Lo and behold – an hour later my drunken sailor-friend calls… I go to another phone and call the police, while chatting with Popeye. Five minutes later the police are at his door (I hear them knocking) and soon the officer is on the other end. Promised to talk to him and get him to stop.

Never heard from him again.

Still don’t know who Erick is nor why he allegedly was at my number. laugh

"If, therefore, any be unhappy, let him remember that he is unhappy by reason of himself alone." Epictetus

posts: 11386   ·   registered: Sep. 29th, 2005
id 8762928

 ladyphoenix (original poster member #72766) posted at 8:45 PM on Tuesday, November 1st, 2022

So, thanks to the kind pizza shop owner, I now have a picture (not great but clear enough) of the woman who keeps wrong dialing my phone. It is not the AP, I did not expect that it was based on the caller's voice. I have heard a recording of the AP so I was pretty sure about that.

She is not someone I recognize. She wore long shorts, sneakers, and a hoodie. She spent two hours sleeping/passed out on a table in the corner until she was told they were closing at which point she got up and made the call. If she calls again I will let her know that I have her picture and that if she keeps calling, I will inform the police.

I wish I could say that it's all resolved now. But retriggering my suspicions has been a miserable experience for me, and FWH. I am on edge, hypervigilant, agitated, and easily irritated. We are doing our best to get through this, but it sure has been a challenge. I am not back at square one. I am feeling unsafe and worn out.

I know I can get through this. This whole process is hard. I can do hard things and this is just a small step backwards.

Thank you for all of your kind words, advice, and encouragement. It was helpful to "talk" about it.

M 24 years, together 30. DD1 Feb 2019, DD2(TT) June 2019, DD3 (TT) July 2019, (TT) March 2020, (TT) Sept 2020.We have 3 children: 23,19, 14 and two grandchildren since 2019. We work daily on R and building a stronger relationship.

posts: 144   ·   registered: Feb. 8th, 2020   ·   location: Canada
id 8763147

 ladyphoenix (original poster member #72766) posted at 8:53 PM on Tuesday, November 1st, 2022


I think that would make me crazy to not know what happened to the individuals in your story. It must have been a little satisfying to have at least the small conclusion that you did.

M 24 years, together 30. DD1 Feb 2019, DD2(TT) June 2019, DD3 (TT) July 2019, (TT) March 2020, (TT) Sept 2020.We have 3 children: 23,19, 14 and two grandchildren since 2019. We work daily on R and building a stronger relationship.

posts: 144   ·   registered: Feb. 8th, 2020   ·   location: Canada
id 8763149

ThisIsSoLonely ( Guide #64418) posted at 9:27 PM on Tuesday, November 1st, 2022

Your posts remind me of a family member.

My step brother has a serious mental illness (schizoaffective disorder - paranoid schizophrenia combined with bi-polar and severe depression). He is in his 50s and has fallen off his meds over the course of the last 35 years multiple times, and when he does, he can seem fairly outwardly normal unless you try to hold a long conversation with him, but amongst other things, he calls my parents house from random places - sometimes telling them its him, and other times giving them some other name. Using/borrowing phones is one of his standbys - because they are "not tapped" and so they "can't be traced." He borrows cell phones from random strangers, calls from businesses, etc, and usually (but not always) late at night, after he drinks (which he does not do when medicated and normalized). To me - using random phones apparently repeatedly in close succession screams mental illness (not to mention sleeping at a table for several hours beforehand).

So - this is another option, and sadly one I have experienced personally. Not saying it's the answer but it might be.

[This message edited by ThisIsSoLonely at 9:30 PM, Tuesday, November 1st]

You are the only person you are guaranteed to spend the rest of your life with. Act accordingly.

posts: 1987   ·   registered: Jul. 11th, 2018
id 8763152
Topic is Sleeping.
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