SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

How much time does everyone get? I get 5 days. the gal I work with husband died around the middle of december and she is off until the 16th of january. it has been very hard to pick up her share of the load while doing mine and I'm getting a little resentful. I hate to be a ruthless bitch but dang. I'm sure the extra days are a deduction in pay but they're letting her do it.

When I worked I got 3 days bereavement pay. Any other time off was not paid.

I'm sure that your company has a protocol, and she may be taking an extended leave and using her own PTO to cover the extended stay.

I believe the standard (in the US) for a spouse is on 3-5 days, and for 1st degree relative 1-2 days.

However most of us need more time than that to get things done, the funeral, etc, and then really don't get any time to deal w/ the grief.

If your employer has an IEP/IAP program, that may also be allowing her to take time off.

Losing a spouse is a pretty big hit for most people. Especially if it was unexpected.

She may not perform to her prior level for quite some time when she comes back either. So I would be sure to share with your boss, if the workload you are currently carrying is too much.

For a spouse, my company gives five days.

I can't imagine being able to function at work after five days though. The guy I was seeing, passed away unexpectedly and I had a very hard time with it...and we were just dating. So a spouse would be way harder.

I would think your CW would need some medical short-time leave to get it together.

I would not direct your resentful'ness at her though....I would place it on your employer. They should be getting you help with the extra work if it is more than you can do for a month.

My company gives three days. I have a coworker who unexpectedly lost her husband last year and she took a month off. Everyone pitched in and helped cover her job. We're a smaller family owned company, though.

I agree with this:

I would not direct your resentfulness at her though....I would place it on your employer. They should be getting you help with the extra work if it is more than you can do for a month.

agreed.

Local is 3 days. If travel incolved 5 days. I took more when my mom passed last month and it was vacation time used.

I give three days for immediate family if in state, five days if out of state. However, they can extend it with either paid or unpaid PTO. It is still their responsibility to make sure their job deliverables are covered no matter what (we have contractual obligations), but I try to be as accommodating as I can. Haven't encountered any problems in over eight years, and everyone tries to pitch in and cover the slack.

Up to 5 days paid for immediate family, but you can take additional time using either your PTO days or take it unpaid.

My company doesn't pay for any bereavement days. You're allowed to take up to 3 days off without penalty per policy. I imagine it would be pretty simple to get a doctor to fill out FMLA paperwork though. That said, nobody would bat an eye at someone taking much longer than 3 days for the death of their spouse or child.

If you're frustrated with the increased job duties while she is out, please speak to your boss. She likely won't be at 100% for quite some time, and will need compassion.