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Decisions

Thomas11 posted 11/20/2019 09:39 AM

Posting as this is the place with the people that understand the mess infidelity is and just needed to get it out. Probably sound like a broken record. For those that donít know, WW had 6 year long term affair. I gave it a shot, but others donít change unless they want to. Research showed thousands spent talking to psychics lately (was always about OM before), so put GPS back in service. Drove by his house 3 times in last month (twice in last 8 days) and preceded it restarting last time. Confronted last night and am divorcing. No contact but not living with pining any longer. Relieved, but none of it is easy.

EllieKMAS posted 11/20/2019 09:41 AM

(((T11)))

I am so sorry. But good for you getting out of limbo. D sucks, but it is worth it to not have to live like that anymore.

Keep on swimming!

Chaos posted 11/20/2019 09:43 AM

Damn. I'm sorry.

BeyondRage posted 11/20/2019 09:44 AM

No contact but not living with pining any longer. Relieved, but none of it is easy.

Six years and still pining???? Her words in the confrontation or did you get the denial bull shit???

Not making a decision is the hardest part. Just my opinion, but "limbo" is the worst state to be in.

i am assuming you are absolutely sure of NC??

fareast posted 11/20/2019 11:22 AM

Sorry it came to this Thomas but you will be in a better place. She has shown she is not worthy of you. You gave it your best. Always value yourself. Good luck.

Thomas11 posted 11/20/2019 11:25 AM

No contact and will not admit to pining, but talking about OM to some stranger and driving by his home says enough. Pining is crappy and happens, but not dealing with it professionally so that itís understood and ends, and doing this other stuff says sheís not all in, so I canít be either.

ThisIsSoLonely posted 11/20/2019 11:32 AM

Pining is crappy and happens, but not dealing with it professionally so that itís understood and ends, and doing this other stuff says sheís not all in, so I canít be either.

I'm pretty sure this is where my WH has lived for a long time. He goes back over and over and over again. And where does that leave you (and me)? On the outside looking in at a life we thought we were a part of. I'm sorry it's come to this - it came to me in a similar way. The contact for him always resumes...and likely will forever IMO. They are destined to have the 10+ year A (it's been 2.5 now) and fuck over every person who becomes involved with my WH - it will only end if the AP's OBS divorces her I think. Who knows if that will happen but it's not my problem anymore.

Robert22205https posted 11/20/2019 12:16 PM

I read your prior posts as well as this current one.

Every spouse has a right to feel safe from infidelity. Your wife has failed repeatedly over a long time frame.

IMO your wife's continued obsession with the OM makes her an unsafe life partner. You deserve better.

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