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Christmas Eve D-Day

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Marz posted 1/16/2020 15:50 PM

Many talk about the 180 or no contact but don’t achieve it.

Unless you apply it fully you won’t get to where you need to be.

Newlifeisgreat posted 1/16/2020 16:18 PM

When are you talking to the lawyer?

Who will be moving out?

Why not move out or have all of her stuff boxed up while she is away with the AP??

Good luck and stay strong!!

TheGuy123 posted 1/16/2020 18:35 PM

It sounds to me that you now have a great opportunity to redecorate the house.

Start in the bed room and take down all her crap and hang up some black light posters and velvet paintings of naked ladies with wings riding a unicorn.

Then move to the living room and hang up some neon light beer signs and maybe that picture with a bunch of dogs playing pool.....better yet get rid of the dinning room table and set up an actual pool table. At the very least hang up some swim suite model posters and a dart board

Use her time away wisely.....

If I was you I would pull all her crap off the selves and break out my old beer can collection and set that back up, also I love that singing fish that you hang on the wall and it moves around while singing "take me to the river"....

My point is you can really spruce up the place by getting ride of all the décor while she is gone.

Lets face it....your old ladies days are numbered so why not start "re-organizing" sooner rather than later? Why would she even care she is moving on...right?

Marz posted 1/16/2020 19:01 PM

^^^^^^ do it

Marz posted 1/16/2020 19:02 PM

I’d put a key lock on your bedroom door after I moved her stuff out

Buffer posted 1/17/2020 06:19 AM

Brother, still gather the intel, the fighting battle is just the culmination of the war.
As stated use the weekend wisely, I luv the decor TheGuy describes. Get DD to assist in packing up of WW crap. As others advised can the separation date be the weekend tryst she has planned? Full 180 now, no dinner, she cooks her own meals and pays 50% for everything, or have her evicted! Her free ride is over!
Change everything, close all joint accounts. Advise the landlord that you need her removed from the lease. Again this is if she won’t pay 50/50.

Buffer

heartbrokeninNC posted 1/17/2020 07:08 AM

I've repeatedly told her not to go on this little tryst but she is going "Damn the Torpedoes, Full Speed Ahead " on this shit. Let her know that this marriage is effectively over and that the lawyer is inbound. She says this little getaway is for her "sanity" . She is actively looking for apartments and still will not own the A (typical cheater).

[This message edited by heartbrokeninNC at 7:15 AM, January 17th (Friday)]

heartbrokeninNC posted 1/17/2020 07:16 AM

Who will be moving out?

She will be the one that is moving out.

KingofNothing posted 1/17/2020 09:16 AM

She says this little getaway is for her "sanity" . She is actively looking for apartments and still will not own the A (typical cheater).

You need to spend the upcoming weekend moving her stuff to the garage to make it easier for all concerned. I still think the photography trip is a good idea, but I can see where it might be a pain in the ass and "stalker-like" so you do you on that one.

OrdinaryDude posted 1/17/2020 16:54 PM

I would try to find a PI to surveil her for the weekend trip, if you can swing the funds for that...just to have that info in your pocket if it were to become a factor in the D later.

RubixCubed posted 1/17/2020 17:38 PM

I would try to find a PI to surveil her for the weekend trip if you can swing the funds for that...just to have that info in your pocket if it were to become a factor in the D later.

Definitely this.^^^^

You are in NC so you can do an at-fault divorce. You can also sue the OM for alienation of affection.
So get as much evidence as you can. A PI is the way to go.

KingofNothing posted 1/17/2020 18:24 PM

I would try to find a PI to surveil her for the weekend trip, if you can swing the funds for that...just to have that info in your pocket if it were to become a factor in the D later.

Agreed, 100%. Or drive down and take photos. An hour and a half isn’t too far.

This, is what a lawyer might call a golden opportunity....

Buffer posted 1/17/2020 18:29 PM

Hi Brother

Damn the Torpedoes, Full Speed Ahead
mmm torpedos (ex Navy).
Get the new decor sorted out before she gets back, her stuff can be on the garage and one room only. 50% for all bills, and rent.

Cyber Man hugs
Buffer

heartbrokeninNC posted 1/17/2020 21:26 PM

Did some more intel gathering tonight and was able to get a hold of the iPad and all of her Messenger and iPhone texts come through that also. Will be pulling it down tommorrow. Very incriminating evidence as she was texting this to her friend. The friend was encouraging the affair. My suspicions were granted when she stated she was gonna drop the papers on me last minute but DD discovered it too early and was caught off guard. Tommorrow, I will also be grabbing all the financials as of 1/16 from the bank.

heartbrokeninNC posted 1/17/2020 21:31 PM

Definitely do not have the funds to do a PI.

Newlifeisgreat posted 1/17/2020 22:38 PM

File immediately

The marriage is over

Sorry,

Detach! Detach! Detach!!!!!!

heartbrokeninNC posted 1/17/2020 23:10 PM

I'm already grabbing the ejection seat handles and pulling. Co-worker got me a number for a shark that her mom used and is very good.

Marz posted 1/17/2020 23:15 PM

You have enough it sounds like.

Cut off all contact while she’s on her trip.

A blind man would know what she’s doing.

heartbrokeninNC posted 1/17/2020 23:36 PM

I have stuff going back for the last 4 months and she had an affair before this one with her BFF's brother to kinda ease her into it. All the while the BFF is cheering her on. WW is sooooo f##k'd.

[This message edited by heartbrokeninNC at 11:39 PM, January 17th (Friday)]

OrdinaryDude posted 1/17/2020 23:37 PM

Some states that have a mandatory separation period also have emergency fast divorce for instances of abuse, incarceration, or infidelity...look into it.

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