Hurtingnconfused posted 6/11/2020 23:51 PM

So for anyone following my Jerry Springer story, Karma Bus backed up, one last update.

We file tomorrow. He read over all terms and agreed.... BUT

STBXWH can not refinance his truck without being off the mortgage. I let him know there was a complication with that but I have a solution. I decided I was going to work in the house to get 10-25 thousand more in equity so I wasn’t going to sell immediately. I also let him know he was responsible for half the mortgage until I sold it. I can afford to go a few months on my own and of course family will help. I have a family friend who said he’d fly up in a month or three to do the things I can’t. Offered the friend 10 an hour, beer n food, n plane tickets.

Offered STBXWH 10 bucks an hour off the loan of his truck and the chance to sell in a month. He told me if I paid the truck payment of 129 he’d do the work!!!! Guilt is a WONDERFUL thing. The divorce decree gives me all the sales and proceeds of the house.

I also confused the CRAP out of him. Was genuinely happy to see him for the first time since the “incident “. Met at the bar to go over final psperwork and told him he was right, we definitely needed to be apart and I was SO HAPPY!!! Hugged him and everything, And it’s a true statement. I had to get over the GUILT of not feeling bad, sad, whatever that it was over. But no tears. Ok I take that back, I teared up at work when I signed into my work computer and all of my stuff had been changed to my maiden name. I admit I cried a little at how awesome that was.. love my work family but not one tear over this

Went to IC, went to this same counselor 20 years ago for same reason, cheating spouse. She n I talked and she told me I look happy! Feeling it! Went to DivorceCare class also. asked if it was normal to feel nothing but relief n GLEE! Got down to the nitty gritty and essentially I grieved the last five years, was just waiting for the other show to drop so I could walk away guilt free knowing I did everything I could. I know I will have some more roller coaster but feeling positive optimistic happy relieved stress free Euphoric!!

BOught a “divorce” dress 6 years ago, wearing it!

The1stWife posted 6/12/2020 05:25 AM

You lost a tfriend n of weight and baggage by getting out of a toxic situation.

You deserve happiness!

Rock the divorce dress!!!!

ZenMumWalking posted 6/12/2020 11:17 AM

You're right HnC, this is FANTASTIC!!!!!

tushnurse posted 6/12/2020 11:56 AM

WOW!!! So happy to see this for you.

Now go be happy in life.

nekonamida posted 6/12/2020 14:57 PM

This is wonderful!

I hope he does the work for you but keep that friend in mind in case he doesn't. Be prepared for him to use the time to throw a pity party about how alone he is and how much his life sucks right now. Better yet, plan to be out of the house whenever he's around to work on it. Your happiness is proof that you will thrive without him so don't give him any opportunity to talk you back into misery.

Hurtingnconfused posted 6/14/2020 22:23 PM

I spoke too soon. SHES here for a month and still under foot. He dropped off the Home Depot card in the mail box and I happened to be in my car. They both waved at me from his truck like a SLAP in the face.

I doubt he’s gonna help