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Anyone with Adult Children? Help

LadyG posted 7/12/2020 04:42 AM

Today I Finally asked my 23 year old son, if he was ok about the Divorce. I was concerned that he will hate me if I Divorce his father. I was fearful of asking my adult children their thoughts and feelings.

Son exclaimed “HELL YEAH, YOU NEED TO DIVORCE THAT *******. We were confused by the BULL**** Reconciliation. WTF was that about”

My darling children get it. They won’t hate me after all. 🙏🏼

hcsv posted 7/12/2020 07:48 AM

That's pretty much what I got from my children, especially my son. It seems they see things more clearly than we do. They saw the "pick me dance" for exactly what it was - ridiculous, embarrassing and futile.

My ex does not have a relationship with any of his three children. He believes I have sabotaged the relationships.

If that's what he believes then
1. he doesnt really know me after 40 years and
2. he would be shocked at what I say to them when
and if he ever comes up in conversation(rarely).
I very often find myself defending him and
reminding the kids of the good.

[This message edited by hcsv at 7:49 AM, July 12th (Sunday)]

Chrysalis123 posted 7/12/2020 08:45 AM


How affirming for you. I like your son's attitude.

Countingsheep65 posted 7/12/2020 22:40 PM

Goes to show you, you are making the right decision.

Phoenix1 posted 7/12/2020 23:11 PM

I'm glad you had that conversation. Now you no longer have to worry and wonder.

FWIW, my kids were very supportive of the D, lost all respect for their father, and have no relationship with him. My youngest refers to him as her sperm donor, not dad. My oldest said he is dead to her. He blew it with his kids, big time, and appears to have no interest trying to mend the damage. His loss.

On the flip side, my relationship with my kids is stronger than ever, and it means the world to me. They know who they can count on.

Keep being the strong, supportive, and stable parent!

4kids posted 7/13/2020 00:57 AM


BrokenheartedUK posted 7/13/2020 06:52 AM

Hahahaha!! Kids are way smarter than we realise. My kids have always been supportive of the divorce. They all knew about the A on Dday and had a ringside seat to the shit show of “R” so there was palpable relief when I pulled the plug. And my Ex’s complete unraveling in the aftermath further validated it. My oldest DS turned 22 last week. His father sent him a short text wishing him a happy birthday. No card. No gift. No phone call. My son just shook his head and rolled his eyes about it. There’s no sugar coating of their dads behaviour anymore now that I’m not intervening to try and offset it, as I was in the M. I’m glad you had the talk with your son.

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