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I want to write about my EX with his real name on social media

Knotted09 posted 7/19/2020 00:38 AM

I want to write about my experience using my real name and using my Ex's real name.

possibly attaching screen shots of his dirty emails to the girl he cheated with(he used a fake name but it was our personal laptop i have screen shots)

recommended or no?

its late at night..and i am getting weird ideas...

i want to share my part of the story . how i was used and abused.

and i want to use his real name and possibly put his occupation somewhere there as well..so when its googled...my accounts of things come up and hes exposed.

i am feeling fearless...and just...bold and brave right now.

may regret it later...

Hedwig posted 7/19/2020 03:07 AM

Why would you want to do this?

What will you gain from this?

If it's exposure that you want, you can directly expose him to family/friends.

Tbh, exposing him on social media is going to make you look unhinged. There are better ways to recover and heal from infidelity.

DigitalSpyder posted 7/19/2020 06:38 AM

I imagine the odds are greater that you'll come to regret it than they are that you'll find anything lasting from doing so.

Why waste the time and effort?

Tallgirl posted 7/19/2020 07:01 AM

Honey, you are in pain and want to strike about against the unfairness of it all. You can do this but you will regret it.

There is a string in this forum that is for people to post what they want to say but wonít. Honestly it is really helpful. I suggest you use it. It is called staying no contact. I posted there only yesterday to release some anger. Honestly felt better.

Please post here, not on social media.

A slightly different view, I sometimeS interview people. I always check social media as part of the process. Never post anything that would make a potential employer think twice.

3greatkids posted 7/19/2020 07:14 AM

Unfortunately the satisfaction and easing of your pain you are seeking wonít be found this way. But the potential to increase your difficulties is quite high. Itís totally unfair to be served up such shit sandwiches to choke on. The struggle is immense.

The1stWife posted 7/19/2020 08:44 AM

Not a good idea. If he retaliates it could be ugly for you. He found post things that are untrue and now you are humiliated. With possibly very little recourse.

He loses his job? Hurts you financially doesnít it.

I know the pain and anger. Do not react to it. Heís not a catch - heís a catch and release (fishing term). Be thankful you will move on and heal and end up happier b/c you are no longer living in a bad marriage.

Okokok posted 7/19/2020 09:29 AM

This will make you look like a crazy person and accomplish the exact opposite of what you hope it will.

This will also fuel the flame of whatever narrative your ex has cooked up, changing 0% of the minds of his friends and supporters, but absolutely "proving" to them that you are crazy/messed up/whatever.

In addition, it will probably cause dozens of other (innocent) friends and acquaintances who otherwise don't think about you at all to have their entire concept of you altered and skewed in a negative way. You may change 50+% of their minds from indifferent or positive about you to now thinking you've gone off the rails.

Be aware of this. You will end up hurt.

If you want control of the narrative, exposure of the truth, or even something approaching justice, there are much more effective, tried and true ways to go about living your life and exposing your ex.

Social media posts are nonstarters.

[This message edited by Okokok at 9:30 AM, July 19th (Sunday)]

Muggle posted 7/19/2020 12:25 PM

You want to be heard and you've been heard. You want to punish him and make him feel the pain he's put you through.

Anything you post about him using his real name might result in a lawsuit against you for defamation of character. It won't matter if it's true or not, he might take legal action.

If you have any children would you want them to see what you write? It will only bring them pain, for a moment of vindication for you.

My attorney told me to not post anything public on social media or anywhere else that could be used in court or read by a judge.

Post your story without names, as you also might expose yourself to unwanted attention from random people on the internet.

Concentrate on healing, talk to a councilor or someone that can help you process this soul sucking experience.

He will suffer the consequences of his actions, they all do in some way. It might be today, or it might be years from now but in my experience it will happen.

I'm sorry you're hurting. When I felt like doing something rash, or lashing out in the beginning, I asked myself if this was who I wanted to be. I asked myself if I would hurt anyone else that didn't deserve it. Sometimes sitting on anger for a bit defuses it to something more manageable,

Never act in anger or a moment where you feel powerless. The real power is in making well thought out decisions, that benefit you.

Knotted09 posted 7/19/2020 22:45 PM

thanks everyone.

i stayed up until 2 AM planning my revenge on him. then went to sleep tired.

i am better now.

sober.

hes about to get remarried and i am on all sorts of weird places..from hysterical laughing to ultimate sadness and grief. i alternate between the 2 extremes.

thanks everyone for contributing with your insights.

The1stWife posted 7/20/2020 11:05 AM

Heís getting remarried is a huge trigger for you. So sorry you have to deal with that.

But you are assuming his life is a fairy tale. And the fiancťe is perfect. Do you believe everything you read on FakeBook?

Donít think his life is so great. And knowing him, you completely understand the life the new wife is facing. Dollar bet he cheats on her. Maybe she cheats on him.

The old saying - you never know what goes on behind closed doors.

Celebrate you donít have to live with a lying cheating H.

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