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A Bigger House or a Bigger Life?

LadyG posted 9/25/2020 03:59 AM

This Question was posed to me today, ‘A Bigger House or A Bigger Life?’

I didn’t hesitate with my answer, A BIGGER LIFE!

Absolutely, no judgement as I am at a stage in my life when I can choose a Bigger Life.

What would you choose and Why?

ZenMumWalking posted 9/25/2020 06:08 AM

Like you, bigger life. Life is more fulfilling than a house.

Superesse posted 9/25/2020 06:34 AM

I am not sure what a "bigger life" looks like, but I just came across a local real estate listing for the biggest, most gorgeous old colonial home I have ever seen around here. Every single photo showed perfectly-furnished rooms filled with antiques, lighted with crystal chandeliers, ceilings of beautiful wood, drapes of heavy velvet, kitchen with glass door cabinets 10 feet tall, a butler's pantry...in other words, a real palace, designed and intended for lavishly entertaining crowds, and it just made me feel...sad for the seller.

That house was clearly a showplace for somebody's non-existent lifestyle; otherwise, it wouldn't be for sale! I got the feeling it was a stage set for a movie that will never happen again, if it ever did happen!

So often, people strive to have that kind of material setting, yet without friends and family to share it with, what real joy is there in having such a place to rattle around in?

Bigger posted 9/25/2020 07:05 AM

uhhh... What's this about....

DragnHeart posted 9/25/2020 08:09 AM

I guess this depends on what you define a "bigger life" as.

Personally I think I'd go with a bigger house. An addition would mean each kid has their own bedroom and maybe I could have an art/craft studio.

EvenKeel posted 9/25/2020 08:45 AM

Bigger life.

Better to be living/enjoying life....than to sit in a big ole house being house-poor (ie restrictive lifestyle because you can't afford to do anything).

My children frequently talk about the memories we have made doing things through-out their childhood. Not once has either complained about their bedroom size.

Makes me reflect on holiday dinners at my grandmothers. Very small house! Heck the fridge didn't even fit in the kitchen! But we don't recall being cramped around the table. We remember the get-togethers and all the family/friends.

That is a bigger life.

Bigger posted 9/25/2020 08:47 AM

The issue is understanding and defining what a bigger life really is.
I think that for many “bigger” and “better” can be shallow goals. Like if you let a kid chose the meals for a month you will be eating chicken nuggets, burgers, hot-dogs, fries and drinking soda’s and end up toothless, malnourished and with scurvy.
If we were to base “bigger” life on the ability to choose and act without considering the consequences, then it’s not “bigger” by my yardstick.

A “bigger” life IMHO is accepting responsibility and accountability and being happy with your decisions because you are both responsible and accountable.
This in turn tends to make us better managers of what we have – including money. If you lead a bigger life the way I see it then you are responsible and accountable. This tends to lead you to the Golden Rule of what makes people financially independent: Spend less than you earn. Do that and I don’t care if you spend your money responsibly on travel, charity, your kids or… a bigger house.

So yes – a bigger life all day.

somanyyears posted 9/25/2020 09:02 AM

..very thought provoking question...

...spent your money on a big mortgage ..OR ..go places, see the world and experience new thrills.
Cars might enter into the equation?? The house or the Ferrari collection??

Also, it depends on what stage your life is at..

For me, Down-sizing is on my mind. I've filled the big house with 'stuff' gathered over the years.
At 73... ? I could take up sky diving or rides in spaceships... or go back to school and become a... lawyer maybe??? FAT CHANCE!!! (read my bio!)

There is a special peace-of-mind that comes with owning a home.. and size doesn't matter.

I would advise striking a 'balance'... don't let a huge mortgage tie you down and deny you the other pleasures in life.


DragnHeart posted 9/25/2020 11:41 AM

I guess having a big life for me IS my home. Life is more than big and busy here. My home is also my place of zen. Then again with being so cramped it's also chaotic.

We do our family outings and whatnot but as I was told our kids are very lucky to have the farm and be able to play and explore all they want. Just getting them inside for dinner is a challenge most days.

I'd never try to one up someone in the size of my home. Just add on to make it more convenient. It's really a very simple and small home. I have no desire to put on a show for people. I have ducks running around my kitchen....not exactly show home worthy lol

But its home.

What does a big life mean? Travel? Being well known and liked? Keeping up with the Jones?

I'm more than content to sit in the back yard surrounded by ducks and geese and a goat who wants attention and listen to the loons calling in the distance.

WhatsRight posted 9/26/2020 21:32 PM

For the short time that we had the “bigger house“, about 13 years, it WAS a “bigger life“.

Every holiday we were able to host at our home because there was more room.

Every July fourth it was a huge event. Friends and family used the pool for their children’s birthday parties. Halloween was crazy big. Hay rides and bonfires.

And we have all of those memories. That is what a bigger life means to me.

Now that we have drastically downsized, it is more lonely, less residents, less activity.

soverybetrayed posted 9/27/2020 08:34 AM

I had to downside when I chose to buy an RV an travel for work. It was hard but it helped me realize that things aren't important to me. I actually downsized so much that I could fit all of my stuff into a ford focus hatchback.

I am buying a park model home which is 399sq ft so I have more stuff now but I still keep it uncluttered.

I loved having adventures in my 21 ft RV and worked in New York, Kentucky and Texas. I worked as a work camper and made wonderful friends.

I love the idea of less stuff for a bigger life and more adventure.

Lionne posted 9/28/2020 17:32 PM

I'm extremely lucky. I am able to have both. Our current house is biggish, 4 B 2.5 baths, our unused basement is finished, handy when the kids were young, not needed now. The costs to live here are more than manageable, so is the upkeep. I like the idea of downsizing but the anticipation of packing and moving is completely intimidating.

I'd go for the big life if I had to choose. We lived in a tiny house before the issue of school quality came into consideration. Finding a comparable smaller house with some of the features we have, notably a lot on the woods, didn't happen.

We've accumulated too much STUFF. I am not a saver but my H and 2 sons are. I have 1800-got-junk on speed dial as soon as I can convince them that they really don't need all those swimming ribbons and extra boat motors.

crazyblindsided posted 9/29/2020 13:42 PM

I went from the Bigger House to the Bigger Life even though I'm living in an apartment now It's easier and less to clean too

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